The Case Is Altered Jonson, Ben This text is an enriched version of the TCP digital transcription A04638 of text S121512 in the English Short Title Catalog (STC 14757). Textual changes and metadata enrichments aim at making the text more computationally tractable, easier to read, and suitable for network-based collaborative curation by amateur and professional end users from many walks of life. The text has been tokenized and linguistically annotated with MorphAdorner. The annotation includes standard spellings that support the display of a text in a standardized format that preserves archaic forms ('loveth', 'seekest'). Textual changes aim at restoring the text the author or stationer meant to publish. Martin Mueller Incompletely or incorrectly transcribed words were reviewed and in many cases fixed by Madeline Burg Hannah Bredar This text has not been fully proofread EarlyPrint Project Evanston IL, Notre Dame IN, St.Louis, Washington MO 2017 Distributed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial 3.0 Unported License A04638.xml Ben Ionson, his Case is alterd. As it hath beene sundry times acted by the children of the Blacke-friers. Jonson, Ben, 1573?-1637. 36 600dpi TIFF G4 page images University of Michigan, Digital Library Production Service Ann Arbor, Michigan 2011 December (TCP phase 2) 99856692 STC (2nd ed.) 14757. Greg, I, 281. 22306 A04638

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Ben Ionson, his Case is alterd. As it hath beene sundry times acted by the children of the Blacke-friers. Case is alterd Case is alterd. Pleasant comedy called, The case is alterd. Jonson, Ben, 1573?-1637. [74] p. Printed [by Nicholas Okes] for Bartholomew Sutton, dwelling in Paules Church-yard neere the great north doore of Paules Church, At London : 1609. 1597

Printer's name from STC.

Running title reads: A pleasant comedy, called The case is alterd.

Signatures: A-I4 K2 (-K2).

Imperfect; all after I3 lacking.

Reproduction of the original in the British Library.

A04638 shc The Case Is Altered Jonson, Ben Madeline Burg Hannah Bredar 1597 play comedy shc no A04638 S121512 (STC 14757). 24202 0 0 0 002247.91F The rate of 247.91 defects per 10,000 words puts this text in the F category of texts with 100 or more defects per 10,000 words. Incorporated ~ 10,000 textual changes made to the SHC corpus by Hannah Bredar, Kate Needham, and Lydia Zoells between April and July 2015 during visits, separately or together, to the Bodleian, Folger and Houghton Libraries as well as the Rare Book Libraries at Northwestern University and the University of Chicago

BEN : IONSON , HIS CASE IS ALTERD .

As it hath beene sundry times Acted by the Children of Blacke-friers .

AT LONDON Printed for Bartholomew Sutton , dwelling in Paules Church-yard neere the great north doore of S. Paules Church . 1609 .

A pleasant Comedy called , the Case is Alterd .
Actus primi ,
Scaena prima . Sound ? after a flourish : Iuniper a Cobler is discouered , sitting at worke in his shoppe and singing . Iuniper , Onion , Antony Baladino . YOV wofull wights giue eare a while , And marke the tenor of my stile , Enter Onion in hast . Which shall such trembling hearts vnfold As seldome hath to fore bene told . Such chances rare and dolefull newes Oni. fellow Iuniper Peace a Gods name . As may attempt your wits to muse . Oni. Gods so , heere man . A pox a God on you . And cause such trickling teares to passe , Except your hearts be flint or brasse : Oni. Iuniper , Iuniper . To heare the newes which I shall tell , That in Castella once befell . Sbloud , where didst thou learne to corrupt a man in the midst of a verse , ha ? Onion .

Gods lid man , seruice is ready to go vp man , you must slip on your coate and come in , we lacke waiters pittyfully .

Iunip.

A pittifull hearing , for now must I of a merry Cobler become mourning creature .

Exit Onion . Onion .

Well you le come .

Iunip.

Presto . Go to , a word to the wise , away , flie ? vanish : Lye there the weedes that I disdaine to weare .

Anto.

God saue you Maister Iuniper .

Iuni.

What Signior Antonio Balladino , welcome sweet Ingle ,

Anto.

And how do you sir ?

Iuni.

Faith you see , put to my shifts here as poore retainers be oftentimes , sirrah Antony ther 's one of my fellowes mightely enamored of thee , and I faith you slaue , now your come I 'le bring you together , i'ts Peter Onion , the groome of the hal , do you know him .

Anto.

No not yet , I assure you .

Iuni.

O he is one as right of thy humour as may be , a plaine simple Rascal , a true dunce , marry he hath bene a notable vilaine in his time : he is in loue , sirrah , with a wench , & I haue preferd thee to him , thou shalt make him some prety Paradox or some Aligory , how does my coate sit ? well .

Anto.

I very well .

Enter Onion . Oni.

Na Gods so , fellow Iuniper , come away .

Iun.

Art thou there mad slaue , I come with a powder ? . Sirrah fellow Onion . I must haue you peruse this Gentleman well , and doe him good offices of respect and kindnesse , as instance shall be giuen .

Anto.

Nay good maister Onion what do you meane , I pray you sir you are to respectue in good faith .

Onion

I would not you should thinke so sir , for though I haue no learning , yet I honour a scholer in any ground of the earth sir ,

Shall I request your name sir ?

Anto.

My name is Antonio Balladino .

Oni,

Balladino ? you are not Pageant Poet to the City of Millaine sir , are you .

Anto.

I supply the place sir : when a worse cannot be had sir .

Oni.

I crie you mercy sir , I loue you the better for that sir , by Iesu you must pardon me , I knew you not , but I l'd pray to be better acquainted with you sir , I haue seene of your works .

Anto.

I am at your seruice good Maister Onion , but concerning this maiden that you loue sir ? what is she ,

Onion .

O did my fellow Iuniper tell you ? marry sir , she is as one may say , but a poore mans child indeede , and for mine owne part I am no Gentleman borne I must confesse , but my mind to me a kingdome is truly .

Anto.

Truly a very good saying .

Onion .

T' is somewhat stale , but that 's no matter .

Anto.

O t' is the better , such things euer are like bread , which the staler it is , the more holesome .

Onion .

This is but a hungry comparison in my iudgement .

Anto.

Why , I 'le tell you , M. Onion , I do vse as much stale stuffe , though I say it my selfe , as any man does in that kind I am sure . Did you see the last Pageant , I set forth ?

Onion .

No faith sir , but there goes a huge report on 't .

Anto.

Why , you shal be one of my Maecen-asses , I 'le giue you one of the bookes , O you 'le like it admirably .

Oni.

Nay that 's certaine , I 'le get my fellow Iuniper to read it .

Anto.

Reade it sir , I 'le reade it to you .

Onion .

Tut then I shall not chuse but like it .

Anto.

Why looke you sir , I write so plaine , and keepe that old Decorum , that you must of necessitie like it ; mary you shall haue some now ( as for example , in plaies ) that will haue euery day new trickes , and write you nothing but humours : indeede this pleases the Gentlemen : but the common sort they care not for 't , they know not what to make on 't , they looke for good matter , they , and are not edified with such toyes .

Onion .

You are in the right , I 'le not giue a halfepeny to see a thousand on 'hem . I was at one the last Tearme , but & euer I see a more roguish thing , I am a peece of cheese , & no onion , nothing but kings & princes in it , the foole came not out a lot .

Anto.

True sir , they would haue me make such plaies , but as I tell hem , and they 'le giue me twenty pound a play , I 'le not raise my vaine .

Onion .

No , it were a vaine thing , and you should sir .

Anto.

Tut giue me the penny , giue me the peny , I care not for the Gentlemen I , let me haue a good ground , no matter for the pen the plot shall carry it .

Onion .

Indeed that 's right , you are in print already for the best plotter .

Anto.

I , I might as well ha bene put in for a dumb shew too .

Ont.

I marry sir , I marle you were not , stand aside sir a while :

Enter an armd Sewer : some halfe dozen in mourning coates following and passe by with seruice . Enter Valentine . Onion

How now friend , what are you there ? be vncouered , Would you speake with any man here ?

Valen,

I , or else I must ha' returnd you no answer .

Oni.

Friend , you are somewhat to peremptory , let 's craue your absence : nay neuer scorne it , I am a little your better in this place .

Valen.

I do acknowledge it .

Onion .

Do you acknowledge it ? nay then you shall go forth , I le teach you how shall acknowledge it another time ; go to , void , I must haue the hall purg'd , no setting vp of a rest here , packe , begone .

Valen.

I pray you sir is not your name Onion ?

Oni.

Your friend as you may vse him , and M. Onion , say on .

Valen.

M. Onion with a murraine , come come put off this Lyons hide , your eares haue discouered you , why Peter ! do not I know you Peter ?

Onion .

Gods so , Valentine !

Valen.

O can you take knowledge of me now sir ?

Oni.

Good Lord , sirra , how thou art altred with thy trauell ?

Valen.

Nothing so much as thou art with thine office , but sirra , Onion is the Count Ferneze at home ?

Exit Anthony . Oni.

I Bully , he is aboue ; and the Lord Paulo Ferneze , his son , and Maddam Aurelia , & maddam Phaenixella , his daughters , But O Valentine ?

Valen.

How now man , how dost thou ?

Oni.

Faith sad , heauy , as a man of my coate ought to be .

Valen.

Why man , thou wert merry inough euen now .

Oni. True , but thou knowest All creatures here soiorning , vpon this wretched earth , Sometimes haue a fit of mourning , as well as a fit of mirth . O Valentine , mine old Lady is dead , man . Valen.

Dead !

Oni.

I faith .

Valen.

When dyed she ?

Onion .

Mary , to morrow shall be three months , she was seene going to heauen they say , about some fiue weekes agone ! how now ? trickling teares , ha ?

Valen.

Faith thou hast made me weepe with this newes .

Onion .

Faith thou hast made me weepe with this newes .

Onion .

Why I haue done but the parte of an Onion , you must pardon me .

Scaene . 2. Enter the sewer , passe by with seruice againe , the seruing-men take knowledge of Valentine as they goe . Iuniper salutes him . Iuni.

What Valentine ? fellow Onion , take my dish I prithee you rogue sirrah , tell me , how thou dost , sweet Ingle .

Valen.

Faith , Iuniper , the better to see thee thus frolicke .

Iuni.

Nay , slid I am no changling , I am Iuniper still . Exit Oni. I keepe the pristmate ha , you mad Hierogliphick , when shal we swagger .

Valen.

Hierogliphick , what meanest thou by that .

Iuni.

Meane ? Gods so , i st not a good word man ? what ? stand vpon meaning with your freinds . Puh , Absconde .

Valen.

Why , but stay , stay , how long has this sprightly humor haunted thee ?

Iuni.

Foe humour , a foolish naturall gift we haue in the Aequinoctiall .

Valen.

Naturall , slid it may be supernaturall , this ?

Iuni.

Valentine , I prithee ruminate thy selfe welcome . What fortuna de la Guerra .

Valen. O how pittifully are these words forc't . As though they were pumpt out on 's belly . Iuni.

Sirrah Ingle , I thinke thou hast seene all the strange countries in Christendome since thou wentst ?

Valen.

I haue seene some Iuniper .

Iuni.

You haue seene Constantinople ?

Valen.

I , that I haue .

Iuni.

And Ierusalem , and the Indies , and Goodwine sands , and the tower of Babylon , and Venice and all .

Valen.

I all ; no marle and he haue a nimble tong , if he practise to vault thus from one side of the world to another .

Iuni.

O it 's a most heauenly thing to trauel , & see countries , especially at sea , and a man had a pattent not to be sicke .

Valen.

O sea sicke lest , and full of the scuruie .

Scaene 3. Enter Iuniper , Antonio , Sebastian , Martino , Vincentio , Balthasar and Christophero . Seba.

Valentine ? welcome I faith how dost sirra ?

Mart.

How do you good Valentine .

Vincen.

Troth , Valentine , I am glad to see you .

Balth.

Welcome sweet rogue .

Sebast.

Before God he neuer lookt better in his life .

Balth.

And how i st man ? what , Alla Coragio .

Valen.

Neuer better gentlemen I faith .

Iuni.

S'will here comes the steward .

Christ .

Why how now fellowes all here ? and nobody to waight aboue now they are ready to rise ? looke vp one or two Signior Francesco Colomia's man how doo's your good maister .

Exeunt Iuniper , Martino , Vincentio . Valen.

In health sir he will be here anon .

Christo.

Is he come home , then ?

Valen.

I sir he is not past sixe miles hence , he sent me before to learne if Count Ferneze were here and returne him word .

Christo.

Yes , my Lord is here ; and you may tel your maister he shal come very happily to take his leaue of Lord Paulo Ferneze : who is now instantly to depart with other noble gentlemen , vpon speciall seruice .

Valen.

I will tell him sir .

Christo.

I pray you doe , fellowes make him drinke .

Valen.

Sirs , what seruice i st they are imployed in ?

Sebast.

Why against the French they meane to haue a fling at Millaine againe they say .

Valen.

Who leades our forces , can you tell ?

Sebast.

Marry that do's Signior Maximilian ? he is aboue , now .

Valen.

Who , Maximilian of Vicenza ?

Balt.

I he ? do you know him ?

Valen.

Know him ? O yes he 's an excellent braue soldier .

Balt.

I so they say , but one of the most vaine glorious men in Europe .

Valen.

He is indeed , marry exceeding valient .

Sebast.

And that is rare .

Balt.

What .

Sebast.

Why to see a vaineglorious man valient .

Valen.

Well he is so I assure you .

Enter Iuniper . Iuni.

What no further yet , come on you precious rascall , sir Valentine , I le giue you a health I faith , for the heauens you mad Capriceio , hold hooke and line .

Scaene 4. Enter Lord Paulo Ferneze , his boy following him . Pau.

Boy .

Boy .

My Lord .

Pau. Sirrah go vp to Signior Angelio , And pray him ( if he can ) deuise some meanes , To leaue my father , and come speake with me . Boy

I will my Lord .

Pau. Well heauen , be auspicious in the euent ; For I do this against my Genius , And yet my thoughts cannot propose a reason . Why I should feare , or faint thus in my hopes , Of one so much endeered to my loue . Some sparke it is , kindled within the soule : Whose light yet breaks not to the outward sence , That propagates this tymerous suspect ; His actions neuer carried any face Of change , or weaknes : then I iniury him ? In being thus cold conceited of his faith , O here he comes . Enter Angels . Ang.

How now sweet Lord , what 's the matter ?

Pau. Good faith his presence makes me halfe ashamd . Of my straid thoughts . Boy . Bestow your selfe . Exit Boy . Where is my father , Signior Angelio . Ang.

Marry in the galery , where your Lordship left him .

Pau. That 's well . Then Angelio I will be briefe . Since time forbids the vse of circumstance , How well you are receiued in my affection , Let it appeare by this one instance , onely That now I will deliuer to your trust , The deerest secrets , treasurd in my bosome , Deare Angelio . You are not euery man , But one , whome my election hath design'd , As the true proper obiect of my soule : I vrge not this t' insinuate my desert , Or supple your tri'd temper , with soft phrases ; True frendship lothes such oyly complement : But from th' aboundance of that loue , that flowes Through all my spirits , is my speech enforc'd . Ang. Before your Lordship do proceed too far , Let me be bould to intimate thus much ; That what so ere your wisedome hath t' expose , Be it the waightiest and most rich affaire , That euer was included in your breast , My faith shall poise it , if not � Pau. O no more , Those words haue rapt me with their sweet effects , So freely breath'd , and so responsible , To that which I endeuoured to extract , Arguing a happy mixture of our soules . Ange. Why were there no such sympathy sweete Lord ? Yet the impressure of those ample fauours , I haue deriu'd from your vnmatched spirit , Would bind my faith to all obseruances . Pau. How ! fauours Angello , ô speake not of them , They are meere paintings , and import no merit , Lookes my loue well ? thereon my hopes are plac't : Faith , that is bought with fauours , cannot last . Enters Boy . Boy .

My Lord .

Pau.

How now ?

Boy . You are sought for all about the house , within , The Count your father cals for you . Pau. God , what crosse euents do meet my purposes ? Now will he violently fret and grieue That I am absent . Boy , say I come presently : Exit Boy . Sweet Angello , I cannot now insist Vpon particulars , I must serue the time The maine of all this is , I am in loue . Ange.

Why starts your Lordship ?

Pau.

I thought I heard my father comming hither ward , list , ha ?

Ange.

I heare not any thing , it was but your imagination sure .

Pau.

No ?

Ange.

No , I assure your Lordship .

Pau.

I would worke safely .

Ange.

Why , has he no knowledge of it then ?

Pau. O no , no creature yet pertakes it but your selfe In a third person , and beleeue me friend , The world containes not now another spirit , To whom I would reueile it . Harke , harke , Seruants . Signior Paulo . Lord Ferneze . within . Ange. A pox vpon those brazen throated slaues , What are they mad , trow ? Pau. Alas , blame not them , Their seruices are ( clock-like ) to beset , Backward and forward , at their Lords command , You know my father's wayward , and his humour Must not receiue a check , for then all obiects , Feede both his griefe and his impatience , And those affections in him , are like powder , Apt to enflame with euery little sparke , And blow vp reason , therefore Angelo , peace . within . Count .

Why this is rare , is he not in the garden ?

Crist.

I know not my Lord .

Count .

See , call him ?

Pau.

He is comming this way , let 's withdraw a little .

Exeunt . within . Seruants . Signior Paulo , Lord Ferneze , Lord Paulo .
Scaene 5. Enter Count Ferneze , Maximilian , Aurelia , Phoenixella , Sebast . Balthasar . Count .

VVHere should he be , trow ? did you looke in the armory ?

Sebast.

No my Lord .

Count .

No , why there ? ô who would keepe such drones ? Exeunt Sebast . and Baltha . How now , ha ye found him ?

Enter Martino .
Mart.

No my Lord .

Count . No my Lord , I shall haue shortly all my family Speake nought , but no my Lord , where is Christophero , Enter Christophero . Looke how he stands , you sleep y knaue , Exit Martino . What is he not in the Garden ? Christo.

No my good Lord .

Count .

Your good Lord , ô how this smels of fennell . Enter Sebast Baltha . You haue bene in the garden it appeares , well , well .

Balth.

We cannot find him my Lord .

Sebast.

He is not in the armory .

Count .

He is not , he is no where , is he ?

Maxi.

Count Ferneze .

Count .

Signior .

Maxi.

Preserue your patience honorable Count .

Count . Patience ? a Saint would loose his patience to be crost , As I am with a sort of motly braines , See see , how like a nest of Rookes they stand , Enter Onion . Gaping on one another ! now Diligence , what news bring you ? Oni.

An t please your honour .

Count .

Tut , tut , leaue pleasing of my honour Diligence , you double with we , come .

Oni.

How : does he find fault with Please his Honour . S'wounds it has begun a seruing mans speech , euer since I belongd to the blew order : I know not how it may shew , now I am in blacke , but �

Count .

What 's that , you mutter sir ? will you proceed ?

Oni.

An t like your good Lordship .

Count .

Yet more ; Gods precious .

Oni.

What , do not this like him neither ?

Count .

What say you sir knaue ?

Oni.

Mary I say your Lordship were best to set me to schoole againe , to learne how to deliuer a message .

Count .

What do you take exceptions at me then .

Oni.

Exception ? I take no exceptions , but by Gods so your humours �

Count .

Go to you are a Raskall , hold your tongue .

Oni.

Your Lordships poore seruant , I .

Count .

Tempt not my patience .

Oni.

Why I hope I am no spirit , am I ?

Maxi.

My Lord , command your Steward to correct the slaue .

Oni.

Correct him , S'bloud come you and correct him and you haue a minde to it , correct him , that 's a good iest I faith , the Steward and you both , come and correct him .

Count .

Nay see , away with him , pull his cloth ouer his eares .

Oni.

Cloth ? tell me of your cloth , here 's your cloth , nay and I mourne a minute longer , I am the rottenest Onion that euer spake with a tongue .

They thrust him out .
Maxi.

What call your hind's count Ferneze ?

Count .

His name is Onion Signior ,

Maxi.

I thought him some such sawcy companion .

Count .

Signior Maximillian .

Maxi.

Sweet Lord .

Count . Let me intreat you , you would not regard Any contempt flowing from such a spirit , So rude , so barbarous . Maxi.

Most noble Count vnder your fauour �

Coun. Why I le tell you Signior , Hee le bandy with me word for word , nay more , Put me to silence , strike me perfect dumb ; And so amaze me , that oftentimes I know not , Whether to check or cherish his presumption : Therefore good Signior . Maxi.

Sweet Lord satisfie your selfe , I am not now to learn how to manage my affections , I haue obseru'd , and know the difference betweene a base wretch and a true man , I can distinguish them , the property of the wretch is , he would hurt and cannot , of the man , he can hurt , and will not .

Coun. Go to , my merry daughter , ô these lookes , Agree well with your habit , do they not ? Enter Iuniper . Iunip.

Tut , let me alone . By your fauour , this is the Gentleman I thinke , Sir you appeare to be an honorable Gentleman , I vnderstand , and could wish ( for mine owne part ) that things were conden't otherwise then they are : but ( the world knowes ) a foolish fellow , somewhat procliue , and hasty , he did it in a preiudicate humour ; mary now vpon better computation , he wanes ; he melts ; his poore eyes are in a cold sweat . Right noble Signior , you can haue but compunction , I loue the man , tender your compassion .

Maxi.

Doth any man here vnderstand this fellow ?

Iunip.

O God sir , I may say frustra to the comprehension of your intellection .

Maxi. Before the Lord , he speakes all riddle , I thinke . I must haue a comment ere I can conceiue him . Count . Why he sues to haue his fellow Onion pardon'd , And you must grant it Signior . Maxi.

O with all my soule my Lord , is that his motion ?

Iunip.

I sir , and we shall retort these kinde fauours with all allacrity of spirit , we can sir , as may be most expedient , as well for the quality as the cause , till when in spight of this complement : I rest a poore Cobler , seruant to my honorable Lord here , your friend and Iuniper .

Exit . Maxi.

How Iuniper ?

Count .

I Signior .

Maxi.

He is a sweete youth , his tongue has a happy turne when he sleepes .

Enter Paulo Ferneze , Francisco , Colomea , Angelo , Valentine . Count . I for then it rests , O Sir your welcome , Why God be thanked you are found at last . Signior Coloma truly you are welcome , I am glad to see you sir so well returned . Fran. I gladly thanke your honour , yet indeed I am sory for such cause of heauinesse , As hath possest your Lordship in my absence . Count .

O Francisco you knew her what she was !

Fran.

She was a wise and honorable Lady .

Count . I was she not ! well weepe not she is gone , Passons duld eye can make two grieues of one , Whom death marke out , vertue , nor bluod can saue , Princes , as beggers , all must feed the graue . Max.

Are your horse ready Lord Paulo ,

Pau.

I signior the stay for vs at the gate .

Max. Well t is good . Ladies I will take my leaue of you , Be your fortunes as your selues ? faire . Come let vs to horse , Count Ferneze I beare a spirit full of thanks for all your honorable courtesies . Count .

Sir I could wish the number and value of them more in respect of your deseruings . But Signior Maximillian . I pay you a word in priuate .

Aur.

I Faith brother you are fitted for a generall yonder , Beshrow my heart ( If I had Fortunatus hat here ) and I would not wish my selfe a man and go with you , only t' enioy his presence .

Pau.

Why do you loue him so well sister .

Aur.

No by my troth , but I haue such an odde prety apprehension of his humour me thinks : that I am eene tickled with the conceite of it .

O he is a fine man .

Ang

And me thinks another may be as fine as he .

Aur.

O Angelio , do you thinke I do vrge any comparison against you ? no , I am not so ill bred , as to be a deprauer of your worthines : beleeue me , if I had not some hope of your abiding with vs , I should neuer desire to go out of black whilst I liued : but learne to speake i' the nose , and turne puritan presently .

Ang.

I thanke you Lady : I know you can flout .

Aur.

Come doe you take it so ? I faith you wrong me .

Fran. I , but Maddame , Thus to disclaime in all the effects of pleasure , May make your sadnesse seeme to much affected , And then the proper grace of it is lost . Phoenix Indeed sir , if I did put on this sadnesse Onely abroad , and in Society , And were in priuate merry ; and quick humor'd ; Then might it seeme affected and abhord : But as my lookes appeare , such is my spirit , Drown'd vp with confluence of griefe , and melancholy , That like to riuers run through all my vaines , Quenching the pride and feruour of my bloud . Max. My honorable Lord ? no more . There is the honour of my bloud ingag'd , For your sonnes safety . Count . Signior , blame me not , For tending his security so much , He is mine onely sonne , and that word onely , Hath with his strong , and reprecussiue sound , Stroke my heart cold , and giuen it a deepe wound . Max.

Why but stay , I beseech you , had your Lordship euer any more sonnes then this .

Count .

Why haue not you knowen it Maximilian ?

Max.

Let my Sword faile me then .

Count . I had one other yonger borne then this , By twise so many howers as would fill The circle of a yeare , his name Camillo , Whome in that blacke , and fearfull night I lost , ( T is now a nineteene yeares agone at least , And yet the memory of it fits as fresh Within my braine as t were but yesterday ) It was that night wherein the great Chamont , The generall for France surprised Vicenza , Me thinks the horrour of that clamorous shout His souldiers gaue when they attaind the wall , Yet tingles in mine eare , me thinkes I see With what amazed lookes , distracted thoughts , And minds confus'd , we , that were citizens , Confronted one another : euery street Was fild with bitter selfe tormenting cries , And happy was that foote , that first could presse , The flowry champaigne , bordering on Verona Heere I ( imploy'd about my deare wiues safety ) Whose soule is now in peace ) lost my Camillo . Who sure was murdered by the barbarous Souldiers , Or else I should haue heard � my heart is great . Sorrow is faint ? and passion makes me sweat . Max

Grieue not sweet Count : comfort your spirts , you haue a sonne a noble gentleman , he stands in the face of honour : For his safety let that be no question . I am maister of my fortune , and he shall share with me . Farewell my honorable Lord . Ladies once more adiew , for your selfe maddam you are a most rare creature , I tell you so , be not proud of it , I loue you : come Lord Paulo to horse .

Pau.

Adiew good Signior Francesco : farewell sister .

Sound a tucket , and as they passe euery one seuerally depart , Maximilian , Paulo Ferneze and Angelo remaine Ang.

How shall we rid him hence .

Pau. Why well inough ? sweet Signior Maximilian . I haue some small occasion to stay : If it may please you but take horse afore I le ouer take you , ere your troopes be ranged . Max.

Your motion hath tast wel : Lord Ferneze I go

Exit Max.
Pau. Now if my loue faire Rachel , were so happy , But to looke forth . See fortune doth me grace . Enter Rachel . Before I can demaund ? how now loue . Where is your father ? Rach.

Gone abroad my Lord :

Pau:

That 's well ,

Rach. I but I feare hee le presently returne , Are you now going my most honored Lord ? Pau.

I my sweet Rachel .

Ang.

Before God , she is a sweet wench .

Pau. Rachel I hope I shall not need to vrge , The sacred purity of our effects , As if it hung in triall or suspence : Since in our hearts , and by our mutuall vowes , It is confirmd and seald in sight of heauen . Nay doe not weepe , why starte you ? feare not , Loue . Your father cannot be returned so soone , I prithee doe not looke so heauily Thou shalt want nothing Rach. No is your presence nothing , I shall want that , and wanting that , want all For that is all to me . Pau. Content thee sweet I haue Made choise here of a constant friend This gentleman ? one , whose zealous loue I doe repose more , then on all the world , Thy beauteous selfe excepted : and to him , Haue I committed my deere care of thee , As to my genius , or my other soule . Receiue hi gentle loue and what deffects , My absence proues , his presence shall supply . The time is enuious of our longer stay . Farewell deere Rachel . Rach: Most deere Lord , adew , Heauen and honour crowne your deeds , and you , Exit Rachel . Pau.

Faith tell me Angelio how dost thou like her ?

Ang.

Troth well my Lord , but shall I speake my mind .

Pan.

I prithee doe .

Ang. She is deriud too meanely to be wife To such a noble person , in my iudgement . Pau. Nay then thy iudgement is to meene , I see : Didst thou neare read in difference of good T is more to shine in vertue then in bloud . Enter Iaques . Ang.

Come you are so sententious my Lord .

Pau.

Here comes her father . How dost thou good Iaques ?

Ang.

God saue thee Iaques .

Iaq.

What should this meane ? Rachel open the dore .

Exit Iaques . Ang. Sbloud how the poore slaue lookes , as though He had bene haunted by the spirit Lar , Or seene the ghost of some great Satrapas . In an vnsauory sheet . Pru. I muse he spake no , belike he was amazd Comming so suddenly and vnprepard ? Well le ts go : Exeunt .
Actus secundi
Scaena prima . Enter Iaques solus . SO now inough my heart , beat now no more ; At least for this afright , what a could sweat , Flow'd on my browes , and ouer all my bosome ! Had I not reason ? to behold my dore Beset with vnthrifts , and my selfe abroad ? Why Iaques ? was their nothing in the house Worth a continuall eye , a vigelent thought , Whose head should neuer nod , nor eyes once wincke ? Looke on my coate ; my thoughts ; worne quite thred bare , That time could neuer couer with a nappe , And by it learne , neuer with nappes of sleepe , To smother your conceipts of that you keepe . But yet , I maruell , why these gallant youths Spoke me so faire , and I esteemd a beggar ? The end of flattery , is gaine , or lechery : If they seeke gaine of me , they thinke me rich , But that they do not : for their other obiect : T is in my handsome daughter , if it be . And by your leaue , her handsomnesse may tell them My beggery counterfeits , and , that her neatnesse , Flowes from some store of wealth , that breakes my coffers , With this same engine , loue to mine owne breed . But this is answered : Beggers will keepe fine , Their daughters , being faire , though themselues pine . Well then , it is for her , I , t' is sure for her , And I make her so briske for some of them , That I might liue alone once with my gold . O t' is a sweet companion ! kind and true , A man may trust it when his father cheats him ; Brother , or friend , or wife , ô wondrous pelfe , " That which makes all men false , is true it selfe . But now this maid , is but suppos'd my daughter : For I being Steward to a Lord of France , Of great estate , and wealth , called Lord Chammount , He gone into the warres , I stole his treasure , ( But heare not , any thing ) I stole his treasure , And this his daughter , being but two yeares old , Because it lou'd me so , that it would leaue The nurse her selfe , to come into mine armes , And had I left it , it would sure haue dyed . Now herein I was kinde , and had a conscience ; And since her Lady mother that did dye In child-bed of her , loued me passing well , It may be nature fashiond this affection , Both in the child and her : but hee s ill bred , That ransackes tombes , and doth deface the dead . I 'le therefore say no more : suppose the rest , Here haue I chang'd my forme , my name and hers . And liue obsurely , to enioy more safe Enter Rachel . My deerest treasure . But I must abroad , Rachel . Rach.

VVhat is your pleasure sir ?

Iaq. Rachel I must abroad . Lock thy selfe in , but yet take out the key , That whosoeuer peepes in at the key-hole , May yet imagine there is none at home . Rach.

I will sir .

Iaq. But harke thee Rachel : say a theefe should come , And misse the key , he would resoule indeede None were at home , and so breake in the rather : Ope the doore Rachel , set it open daughter ; But sit in it thy selfe : and talke alowd , As if there were some more in house with thee : Put out the fire , kill the chimnies hart , That it may breath no more then a dead man , The more we spare my child , the more we gaine . Exeunt .
Scaene 2. Enter Christophero , Iuniper and Onion . CHrist.

What sayes my fellow Onion ? come on .

Oni.

All of a house sir , but no fellowes , you are my Lords Steward , but I pray you what thinke you of loue , sir ?

Christ .

Of loue Onion ? Why it 's a very honourable humor .

Oni.

Nay if it be but worshipfull I care not .

Iunip.

Go to , it 's honorable , checke not at the conceit of the Gentleman .

Oni. But in truth sir , you shall do well to think well of loue : For it thinkes well of you , in me , I assure you . Chris.

Gramercy fellow Onion : I do thinke well , thou art in loue , art thou ?

Oni.

Partly sir , but I am asham'd to say wholy .

Chris.

Well , I will further it in thee to any honest woman , or maiden , the best I can .

Iunip. Why now you come neere him sir , he doth vaile , He doth remunerate , he doth chaw the cud in the kindnesse Of an honest imperfection to your worship . Chris

But who is it thou louest fellow Onion ?

Oni.

Mary a poore mans daughter , but none of the honestest , I hope .

Chris.

Why , wouldst thou not haue her honest ?

Oni.

O no , for then I am sure she would not haue me . T' is Rachel de Prie .

Chris.

Why , she hath the name of a very vertuous mayden .

Iunip.

So shee is sir , but the fellow talkes in quiddits , he .

Chris.

What wouldst thou haue me do in the matter ?

Oni.

Do nothing sir , I pray you , but speake for me .

Chris.

In what maner ?

Oni.

My fellow Iuniper can tell you sir .

Iunip.

Why as thus sir . Your worship may commend him for a fellow fit for consanguinity , and that he shaketh with defire of procreation , or so .

Chris.

That were not so good , me thinkes .

Iunip.

No sir , why so sir ? what if you should say to her , correborate thy selfe sweete soule , let me distinguish thy pappes with my fingers , diuine Mumps , prety Pastorella ? lookest thou so sweet and bounteous ? comfort my friend here .

Chris.

Well I perceiue you wish , I should say something may do him grace , and further his desires , and that be sure I will .

Oni.

I thanke you sir , God saue your life , I pray God sir .

Iunip.

Your worship is too good to liue long : you le contaminate me no seruice .

Chris.

Command thou wouldest say , no good Iuniper .

Iunip.

Health and wealth sir .

Exeunt Onion and Iuniper .
Chris. This wench will solicite for my selfe , Making my Lord and maister priuy to it ; And if he second me with his consent , I will proceede , as hauing long ere this , Though her a worthy choyce to make my wife . Exit .
Scaene 3. Enter Aurelia , Phoenixella . AVre. Roome for a case of matrons coloured blacke , How motherly my mothers death hath made vs ? I would I had some girles now to bring vp ; O I could make a wench so vertuous , She should say grace to euery bit of meate , And gape no wider then a wafers thicknesse : And she should make French cursies , so most low , That euery touch should turne her ouer backward . Phoeni. Sister , these words become not your attire , Nor your estate : our vertuous mothers death Should print more deepe effects of sorrow in vs , Then may be worne out in so little time . Aure. Sister , faith you take too much Tobacco , It makes you blacke within , as y' are without . What true-stich sister ? both your sides alike ? Be of a sleighter worke : for of my word , You shall be sold as deere or rather deerer ? Will you be bound to customes and to rites ? Shed profitable teares , weepe for aduantage ; Or else , do all things , as you are enclynd . Hate when your stomacke serues ( saith the Physitian ) Not at eleuen and sixe . So if your humour Be now affected with this heauinesse . Giue me the reines and spare not , as I do , In this my pleasurable appetite , It is Praecisianisme to alter that With austere iudgement , that is giuen by nature . I wept you saw too , when my mother dyed : For then I found it easier to do so , And fitter with my moode , then not to weepe . But now t is otherwise , another time Perhaps I shall haue such deepe thoughts of her , That I shall weepe a fresh , some twelue month hence , And I will weepe , if I be so dispos'd , And put on blacke , as grimly then , as now ; Let the minde go still with the bodies stature , Iudgement is fit for Iudges , giue me nature .
Scaene . 4. Enter Aurelia , Phaenixella , Francisco , Augelo . Fran. See Signior Angelo here are the Ladies , Go you and comfort one , I le to the other . Ange. Therefore I come sir , I 'le to the eldest . God saue you Ladies , these sad moodes of yours , That make you choose these solitary walkes , Are hurtfull for your beauties . Aure.

If we had them .

Ange. Come , that condition might be for your hearts , When you protest faith , since we cannot see them . But this same heart of beauty , your sweet face Is in mine eye still . Aure.

O you cut my heart with your sharpe eye .

Ange.

Nay Lady that 's not so , your heart 's to hard .

Aure.

My beauties hart ?

Ange. O no . I meane that regent of affection , Maddam , That tramples on al loue with such contempt in this faire breast . Aur. No more , your drift is sauour'd , I had rather seeme hard hearted Ang. Then hard fauour'd , Is that your meaning , Lady ? Aur. Go too sir . Your wits are fresh I know , they need no spur , Ang.

And therefore you wil ride them .

Aur. Say I doe . They will not tire I hope ? Ang.

No not with you , hark you sweet Lady .

Fran. T is much pitty Maddam . You should haue any reason to retaine This signe of griefe , much lesse the thing disignde . Phoe. Griefes are more fit for Ladies then their pleasures . Fran. That is for such as follow nought but pleasures . But you that temper them so wel with vertues , Vsing your griefes so it would prooue them pleasures . And you would seeme in cause of griefes & pleasures equally pleasant . Phoe Sir so I do now . It is the excesse of either that I striue So much to shun in all my proou'd endeauours , Although perhaps vnto a generall eye , I may appeare most wedded to my griefes , Yet doth my mind forsake no tast of pleasure , I meane that happy pleasure of the soule , Deuine and sacred contemplation Of that eternall , and most glorious blisse . Proposed as the crowne vnto our soules . Fran. I will be silent , yet that I may serue But as a Decade in the art of memory To put you stil in mind of your owne vertues When your too serious thoughts make you too sad ) Accept me for your seruant honored Lady . Phoen. Those cerimonies are too comon signior Francis , For your vncommon grauitie , and iudgement , And fits them onely , that are nought but cerimony . Ang. Come , I will not sue , stally to be your seruant , But a new tearme , will you be my refuge ? Aur.

Your refuge , why sir .

Ange.

That I might fly to you , when all else faile me .

Aur.

And you be good at flying , be my Plouer .

Ang.

Nay take away the P.

Aur.

Tut , then you cannot fly .

Ang.

I le warrant you . I le borrow Cupids wings .

Aur. Masse then I feare me you le do strange things : I pray you blame me not , if I suspect you , Your owne confession simply doth detect you , Nay and you be so great in Cupids bookes , T' will make me Iealous . you can with your lookes ( I warrant you ) enflame a womans heart , And at your pleasure take loues golden dart , And wound the brest of any vertous maide . Would I were hence : good Faith I am affraid , You can constraine one ere they be aware , To run mad for your loue ? Ang.

O this is rate .

Scaene 6. Aurelio , Phoenixella , Francisco , Angelo , Count . COunt . Close with my daughters gentlemen ? wel done , T is like your selues : nay lusty Angelo , Let not my presence make you bauke your sport , I will not breake a minute of discourse Twixt you and one of your faire Mistresses . Ang.

One of my mistresses ? why thinks your Lordship I haue so many

Count . Many ? no Angelo . I do not thinke th' ast many , some fourteene I here thou hast , euen of our worthiest dames , Of any note , in Millaine : Ang.

Nay good my Lord fourteene : it is not so .

Count . by 'th the Masse that i st , here are their names to shew Fourteene , or fifteene t'one . Good Angelo . You need not be ashamd of any of them , They are gallants all . Ang.

Sbloud you are such a Lord .

Count . Nay stay sweet Angelo , I am disposed Exit Ang : A little to be pleasant past my coustome , He 's gone ? he 's gone , I haue disgrast him shrewdly , Daughters take heede of him , he 's a wild youth , Looke what he sayes to you beleeue him not , He will sweare loue to euery one he sees . Francisco , giue them councell , good Francisco , I dare trust thee with both , but him with neither . Fran.

Your Lordship yet may trust both them with him .

Exunt .
Scaene 7. Count . Christopher , Count . Well goe your waies away ; how now Christopher , What newes with you ? Christ .

I haue an humble suit to your good Lordship .

Count .

A suit Christopher ? what suit I prithee ?

Christ . I would craue pardon at your Lordships hands , If it seeme vaine or simple in your sight . Count . I le pardon all simplicity , Christopher , What is thy suit ? Christ . Perhaps being now so old a batcheler , I shall seeme halfe vnwise , to bend my selfe In strict affection to a poore yong maide . Count . What ? is it touching loue Christopher ? Art thou dispost to marry , why t is well . Christo. I , but your Lordship may imagine now That I being steward of your honours house . If I be maried once , will more regard The maintenance of my wife and of my charge , Then the due discharge of my place and office . Count .

No , no , Christopher , I know thee honest .

Christo.

Good faith my Lord , your honour may suspect it � but �

Count . Then I should wrong thee , thou hast euer been Honest and true , and will be still I knowe . Chris. I but this marriage alters many men : And you may feare , it will do me my Lord , But ere it do so ? I will vndergoe Ten thousand seuerall deaths . Count . I know it man . Who wouldst thou haue I prithee ? Chris. Rachel de prie , If your good Lordship , graunt me your consent . Count . Rachel de prie ? what the poore beggers daughter ? Shee s a right handsome maide , how poore soeuer , And thou hast my consent , with all my hart . Chris.

I humbly thanke your honour . I le now aske her father .

Exit . Count . Do so Christofero thou shalt do well . T is strange ( she being so poore ) he should affect her , But this is more strange that my selfe should loue her . I spide her , lately , at her fathers doore , And if I did not see in her sweet face Gentry and noblenesse , nere trust me more : But this perswasion , fancie wrought in me , That fancie being created with her lookes , For where loue is he thinke his basest obiect Gentle and noble : I am farre in loue , And shall be forc'd to wrong my honest steward , For I must sue , and seeke her for my selfe ; How much my duetie to my late dead wife , And my owne deere renowne so ere it swaies , He to her father straight . Loue hates delays . Exit .
Scaene 8. Enter Onion , Iuniper , Valentine , Sebastian , Balthasar , Martino . Onion .

Come on Ifaith , le ts to some exercise or other my hearts : Fetch the hilts fellow Iuniper , wilt thou play :

Exit Martino . Iun.

I cannot resolue you ? t is as I am fitted with the ingenuity , quantity , or quality of the cudgell .

Valen.

How dost thou bastinado the poore cudgell with tearmes ?

Iuni.

O Ingle , I haue the phrases man , and the Anagrams and the Epitaphs , fitting the mistery of the noble science .

Oni.

I le be hangd & he were not misbegotten of some fencer .

Sebast.

Sirrah Valentine , you can resolue me now , haue they their maisters of defence in other countries as we haue here in Italy ?

Valen.

O Lord , I , especially they in Vtopia , there they performe their prizes and chalenges , with as great cerimony as the Italian or any nation else .

Balt

Indeed ? how is the manner of it ( for gods loue ) good Valentine ?

Iuni.

Ingle ? I prithee make recourse vnto vs , wee are thy friends and familiars : sweet Ingle .

Valen.

Why thus sir .

Oni.

God a mercy good Valentine , nay go on .

Iuni.

Silentium bonus socius Onionus , good fellow Onion be not so ingenious , and turbulent : so fir ? and how ? how sweete Ingle ?

Valen.

Marry , first they are brought to the publicke Theater :

Iuni.

What ? ha ? they Theater there

Valen.

Theaters ? I and plaies to : both tragidy and comedy & set foorth with as much state as can be imagined ?

Iuni.

By Gods so ; a man is nobody , till he has trauelled .

Sebast.

And how are their plaies ? as ours are ? extemporall ?

Valen.

O no ? all premeditated things , and some of them very good I faith , my maister vsed to visite them often when he was there .

Balth.

Why how are they in a place where any man may see them ?

Valen.

I , in the common Theaters , I tell you . But the sport is at a new play to obserue the sway and variety of oppinion that passeth it . A man shall haue such a confus'd mixture of iudgement , powr'd out in the throng there , as ridiculous , as laughter it selfe : one saies he likes not the writing , another likes not the plot , another not the playing . And sometimes a fellow that comes not there past once in fiue yeare at a Parliament time or so , will be as deepe myr'd in censuring as the best , and sweare by Gods foote he would neuer stirre his foote to see a hundred such as that is .

Oni.

I must trauell to see these things , I shall nere think well of my selfe else .

Iunip.

Fellow Onion , I le beare thy charges and thou wilt but pilgrimize it along with me , to the land of Vtopia .

Sebast.

Why but me thinkes such rookes as these should be asham'd to iudge .

Valen.

Not a whit ? the rankest stinkard of them all , will take vpon him as peremptory , as if he had writ himselfe in artibus magister .

Sebast.

And do they stand to a popular censure for any thing they present .

Valen.

I euer , euer , and the people generally are very acceptiue and apt to applaud any meritable worke , but there are two sorts of persons that most commonly are infectious to a whole auditory .

Balth.

What be they ?

Iunip.

I come le ts know them .

Oni.

It were good they were noted .

Valen.

Marry ? one is the rude barbarous crue , a people that haue no braines , and yet grounded iudgements , these will hisse any thing that mounts aboue their grounded capacities . But the other are worth the obseruation , I faith .

Omnes .

What be they ? what be they ?

Valen.

Faith a few Caprichious gallants .

Iunip.

Caprichious ? stay , that word 's for me .

Valen.

And they haue taken such a habit of dislike in all things , that they will approue nothing , be it neuer so conceited or elaborate , but sit disperst , making faces , and spitting , wagging their vpright eares and cry filthy , filthy . Simply vttering their owne condition , and vsing their wryed countenances in stead of a vice , to turne the good aspects of all that shall sit neere them , from what they behold .

Enter Martino with cudgels . Oni. O that 's well sayd , lay them downe , come sirs . Who plaies , fellow Iuniper , Sebastian , Balthasar : Some body take them vp , come . Iunip.

Ingle Valentine ?

Valen.

Not I sir , I professe it not .

Iunip.

Sebastian .

Sebast.

Balthasar .

Balth.

Who ? I ?

Oni.

Come , but one bout , I le giue hem thee , I faith .

Balth.

Why , here 's Martino .

Oni.

Foe he , alas he cannot play a whit , man .

Iunip.

That 's all one : no more could you in stata quo prius , Martino , play with him , euery man has his beginning and conduction .

Mart.

Will you not hurt me fellow Onion ?

Oni.

Hurt thee , no ? and I do , put me among pot-hearbs , And chop me to peeces , come on ?

Iunip.

By your fauor sweet bullies giue them roome , back , so , Martino , do not looke so thin vpon the matter .

Oni.

Ha , well plaid , fall ouer to my legge now ? so , to your guard againe , excellent , to my head now , make home your blow : spare not me , make it home , good , good a gaine .

Sebast.

Why how now Peter ?

Valen.

Gods so , Onion has caught a bruise .

Iunip.

Couragio ? be not caprichious ? what ?

Oni.

Caprichious ? not I , I scorn to be caprichious for a scrach , Martino must haue another bout , come .

Val. Seb. Balth.

No , no , play no more , play no more .

Oni.

Foe , t is nothing a philip , a deuise , fellow Iuniper prithee get me a Plantan , I had rather play with one that had skil by halfe .

Mart.

By my troth , fellow Onion , t was against my will .

Oni. Nay that 's not so , t was against my head , But come , wee le ha one bout more . Iunip.

Not a bout , not a stroke .

Omnes .

No more , no more .

Iunip.

Why I le giue you demonstration , how it came , Thou openest the dagger to falsifie ouer with the back sword frick , and he interrupted , before he could fall to the close .

Oni.

No , no , I know best how it was better the� any man here , I felt his play presently : for looke you , I gathered vpon him thus , thus do you see ? for the double locke , and tooke it single on the head .

Valen.

He sayes very true , he tooke it single on the head .

Sebast.

Come le ts go .

Enter Martino with a cob-web .
Mar.

Here fellow Onion , here 's a cob-web .

Oni.

How ? a cob-web Martino , I will haue another bout with you ? S'wounds do you first breake my head , and then giue me a plaister in scorne ? come to it , I will haue a bout .

Mart.

God's my witnesse .

Oni.

Tut ! your witnesse cannot serue .

Iunip.

S'bloud ? why what , thou art not lunatike , art thou ? and thou bee'st auoide Mephostophiles . Say the signe shoud be in Aries now : as it may be for all vs , where were your life ? Answere me that ?

Sebast.

Hee sayes well , Onion .

Valen.

I indeed doo's he .

Iunip.

Come , come , you are a foolish Naturalist , go , get a white a of an egge , and a little flax , and close the breach of the head , it is the most conducible thing that can be . Martino , do not insinuate vpon your good fortune , but play an honest part and beare away the bucklers .

Exeunt .
Act. 3.
Scaene 1. Enter Angelo solus . ANge. My yong and simple friend , Paulo Ferneze , Bound me with mighty solemne coniurations , To be true to him , in his loue , to Rachel , And to solicite his remembrance still , In his enforced absence , much , I faith . True to my friend in cases of affection ? In womens cases ? what a iest it is ? How silly he is , that imagines it ! He is an asse that will keepe promise stricktly In any thing that checkes his priuate pleasure ; Chiefly in loue . S'bloud am not I a man ? Haue I not eyes that are as free to looke ? And bloud to be enflam'd as well as his ? And when it is so , shall I not pursue Mine owne loues longings , but preferre my friends ? I t is a good foole , do so , hang me then , Because I swore , alas , who doo's not know , That louers periuries are ridiculous ? Haue at thee Rachel : I le go court her sure : For now I know her father is abroad . Enter Iaques . S'bloud see , he is here , ô what damn'd lucke is this ? This labour 's lost , I must by no meanes see him . tau , dery , dery , Exit .
Scaene 2. Iaques , Christophero . IAq. Mischiefe and hell , what is this man a spirit , Haunts he my houses ghost ? still at my doore ? He has beene at my doore , he has beene in , In my deere doore : pray God my gold be safe . Enter Christophero . Gods pitty , here 's another . Rachel , ho Rachel . Chris.

God saue you honest father .

Iaq.

Rachel , Gods light , come to me , Rachel , Rachel !

Exit . Chris. Now in Gods name what ayles he ? this is strange ! He loues his daughter so , I le lay my life , That hee 's afraid , hauing beene now abroad , I come to seeke her loue vnlawfully . Enter Iaques . Iaq.

T is safe , t is safe , they haue not rob'd my treasure .

Chris.

Let it not seeme offensiue to you sir .

Iaq.

Sir , God 's my life , sir , sir , call me sir .

Chris.

Good father here me .

Iaq. You are most welcome sir , I meant almost ; and would your worship speake ? Would you abase your selfe to speake to me ? Chris. T is no abasing father : my intent Is to do further honour to you sir Then onely speake : which is to be your sonne . Iaq. My gold is in his nostrels , he has smelt it , Breake breast , breake heart , fall on the earth my entrailes , With this same bursting admiration ! He knowes my gold , he knowes of all my treasure , How do you know sir ? whereby do you guesse ? Chris.

At what sir ? what i st you meane ?

Iaq. I aske , an 't please your Gentle worship , how you know ? I meane , how I should make your worship know That I haue nothing � To giue with my poore daughter ? I haue nothing : The very aire , bounteous to euery man , Is scant to me , sir . Chris.

I do thinke good father , you are but poore ,

Iaq. He thinkes so , harke , but thinke so : He thinkes not so , he knowes of all my treasure . Exit . Chris. Poore man he is so ouerioyed to heare His daughter may be past his hopes bestowed , That betwixt feare and hope ( if I meane simply ) He is thus passionate . Enter Iaques . Iaq. Yet all is safe within , is none without ? No body breake my walles ? Chris.

What say you father , shall I haue your daughter ?

Iaq.

I haue no dowry to bestow vpon her .

Chris.

I do expect none , father .

Iaq. That is well , Then I beseech your worship make no question Of that you wish , t is too much fauour to me . Chris. I le leaue him now to giue his passions breath , Which being setled , I will fetch his daughter : I shall but moue too much , to speake now to him . Exit Christophero . Iaq. So , hee 's gone , would all were dead and gone , That I might liue with my deere gold alone .
Scaene 3. Iaques , Count . Count .

Here is the poore old man .

Iaq.

Out of my soule another , comes he hither ?

Count .

Be not dismaid old man , I come to cheere you .

Iaq. To me by heauen , Turne ribs to brasse , turne voice into a trumpet , To rattle out the battels of my thoughts , One comes to hold me talke , while th' other robbes me . Exit . Count . He has forgot me sure : what should this meane ? He feares authority , and my want of wife Will take his daughter from him to defame her : He that hath naught on earth but one poore daughter , May take this extasie of care to keepe her . Enter Iaques . Iaq. And yet t is safe : they meane not to vse force , But fawning comming . I shall easly know By his next question , if he thinke me rich , Whom see I ? my good Lord ? Count . Stand vp good father , I call thee not father for thy age , But that I gladly wish to be thy sonne , In honoured marriage with thy beauteous daughter . Iaq. O , so , so , so , so , so , this is for gold , Now it is sure , this is my daughters neatnesse , Makes them beleeue me rich . No , my good Lord , I le tell you all ; how my poore haplesse daughter Got that attire she weares from top to toe . Count .

Why father , this is nothing .

Iaq.

O yes , good my Lord .

Count .

Indeed it is not .

Iaq. Nay sweet Lord pardon me ? do not dissemble , Heare your poore beads-man speake ; t is requisite That I ( so huge a beggar ) make account Of things that passe my calling : she was borne T' enioy nothing vnderneath the sonne : But that , if she had more then other beggars She should be enuied : I will tell you then How she had all she weares , her warme shooes ( God wot ) A kind maide gaue her , seeing her go barefoot In a cold frosty morning ; God requite her ; Her homely stockings Count . Father , I le heare no more , thou mou'st too much With thy too curious answere for thy daughter , That doth deserue a thousand times as much , I le be thy Sonne in law , and she shall weare Th' attire of Countesses . Iaq. O good my Lord , Mock not the poore , remembers not your Lordship , That pouerty is the precious gift of God . As well as riches , tread vpon me , rather Then mocke my poorenes . Count . Rise I say : When I mocke poorenes , then heauens make me poore . Enter Nuntius .
Scaene 7. Nuncio , Count . NVn. See here 's the Count Ferneze , I will tell him The haplesse accident of his braue sonne , That hee may seeke the sooner to redeeme him , Exit Iaques . God saue your Lordship . Count .

You are right welcome sir .

Nun.

I would I brought such newes as might deserue it .

Count .

What , bring you me ill newes ?

Nun. T is ill my Lord , Yet such as vsuall chance of warre affoords , And for which all men are prepar'd that vse it , And those that vse it not , but in their friends , Or in their children . Count . Ill newes of my sonne ? My deere and onely sonne , I le lay my soule , Ay me accurs'd , thought of his death doth wound me , And the report of it will kill me quite . Nun.

T is not so ill my Lord .

Count .

How then ?

Nun. Hee 's taken prisoner , and that 's all . Count . That 's enough , enough , I set my thoughts on loue , on seruile loue , Forget my vertuous wife , feele not the dangers , The bands and wounds of mine owne flesh and bloud , And therein am a mad man : therein plagu'd , With the most iust affliction vnder heauen . Is Maximilian taken prisoner to ? Nun.

My good my Lord , he is return'd with prisoners .

Count . I st possible , can Maximilian ? Returne , and view my face without my sonne , For whom he swore such care as for himselfe ? Nun.

My Lord no care can change the euents of war .

Count . O! in what tempests do my fortunes saile , Still wrackt with winds more foule and contrary , Then any northen guest , or Southerne flawe ? That euer yet inforc't the sea to gape , And swallow the poore Marchants traffique vp ? First in Vicenza , lost I my first sonne ; Next here in Millaine my most deere lou'd Lady : And now my Paulo , prisoner to the French , Which last being printed with my other griefes , Doth make so huge a volume , that my brest Cannot containe them . But this is my loue : I must make loue to Rachel , heauen hath throwne , This vengeance on me most deseruedly : Were it for nought but wronging of my steward . Nun. My Lord since onely mony may redresse The worst of this misfortune , be not griued , Prepare his ransome and your noble sonne Shall greete your cheered eyes , with the more honour . Count . I will prepare his ransome : gratious heauen Grant his imprisonment may be his worst , Honored and souldier-like imprisonment , And that he be not manacled and made A drudge to his proude foe . And here I vow , Neuer to dreame of seeme-les amorous toyes , Nor aime at other ioy on earth , But the fruition of my onely sonne . Exunt
Scaene 5. Enter Iaques with his gold and a scuttle full of horse-dung . Iaq, He 's gone : I knew it ; this is our hot louer , I will beleeue them ! I ! they may come in Like simple woers , and be arrant theeues , And I not know them ! t is not to be told , What seruile villanies , men will do for gold , O it began to haue a huge strong smell , Which lying so long together in a place ; I le giue it vent , it shall ha shift inough , And if the diuell , that enuies all goodnesse , Haue told them of my gold , and where I kept it , I le set his burning nose once more a worke , To smell where I remou'd it , here it is : I le hide and couer it with this horse-dung : Who will suppose that such a precious nest Is crownd with such a dunghill excrement ? In my deere life , sleepe sweetly my deere child . " Scarce lawfully begotten , but yet gotten , " And that 's enough . Rot all hands that come neere thee Except mine owne . Burne out all eyes that see thee , Except mine owne . All thoughts of thee be poyson To their enamor'd harts , except mine owne , I le take no leaue , sweet Prince great Emperour , But see thee euery minute , King of Kings , I le not be rude to thee , and turne my backe , In going from thee , but go backward out : With my face toward thee , with humble curtesies , None is within . None ouerlookes my wall . To haue gold , and to haue it safe , is all . Exit .
Actus 3.
Scaene 1. Enter Maximilian , with souldiers Chamount , Camilla , Ferneze , Pacue . Max.

Lord Chamount and your valient friend there , I cannot say welcome to Millaine : your thoughts and that word are not musicall , but I can say you are come to Millaine .

Pac.

Mort diew .

Cha.

Gar soone .

Max.

Gentlemen ( I would cal an Emperour so ) you are now my prisoners , I am sorry , marry this , spit in the face of your fortunes , for your vsage shall be honorable .

Cam. Wee know it signior Maximilian , The fame of al your actions sounds nought else , But perfect honour from her swelling cheeks . Max.

It shall do so still I assure you , and I will giue you reason , there is in this last action ( you know ) a noble gentleman of our party , & a right valient ; semblably prisoner to your general , as your honor'd selfe 's to me , for whose safety , this tongue hath giuen warrant to his honorable father , the Count Ferneze . You conceiue me .

Cam.

I signior .

Max.

Well ? then I must tell you your ransomes be to redeeme him , what thinke you ? your answer .

Cam. Marry with my Lords leaue here I say signior , This free & ample offer you haue made , Agrees well with your honour , but not ours : For I thinke not but Chamount is aswell borne As is Ferneze , then if I mistake not , He scornes to haue his worth so vnderprised , That it should neede an adiunct , in exchange , Of any equall fortune , Noble Signior ? I am a souldier , and I loue Chamount , Ere I would bruse his estimation , With the least ruine of mine owne respect , In this vild kind , these legs should rot with irons , This body pine in prison , till the flesh Dropt from my bones in flakes , like withered leaues , In heart of Autumne , from a stubborne Oke . Maxi.

Mounsieur Gasper ( I take it so is your name ) misprise me not , I wil trample on the hart , on the soule of him that shall say , I will wrong you : what I purpose , you cannot now know ; but you shall know , and doubt not to your contentment . Lord Chamount , I will leaue you , whilest I go in and present my selfe to the honorable Count , till my regression so please you , your noble feete may measure this priuate , pleasant and most princely walke , Souldiers regard them and respect them .

Pac.

O Ver bon : excellenta gull , he tak'a my Lord Chamount for Mounsieur Gaspra , & Mounsieur Gaspra for my Lord Chamont , ô dis be braue for make a me laugh'a , ha , ha , ha , ô my heart tickla .

Cam. I but your Lordship knowes not what hard fate Might haue pursued vs , therefore howsoere The changing of our names was necessary And we must now be carefull to maintaine This error strongly , which our owne deuise , Hath thrust into their ignorant conceits , For should we ( on the taste of this good fortune ) Appeare our selues , t' would both create in them A kinde of iealousie , and perchaunce inuert Those honourable courses they intend . Cha. True my deere Gasper : but this hang by here , Will ( at one time or other ) on my soule Discouer vs : A secret in his mouth Is like a wild bird put into a cage , Whose doore no sooner opens , but t is out . But sirra , if I may but know Thou vtterst it Pac.

Vtteria ? vat Mounsieur ?

Cha.

That he is Gasper , and I true Chamont .

Pac. O pardone moy , fore my tongue shall put out de secreta , Shall breede de cankra in my mouth . Count .

Speake not so loud Pacue .

Pac.

Foe , you shall not heare foole , for all your long eare , Reguard Mounsieur : you be de Chamont , Chamont be Gaspra .

Enter Count Ferueze , Maximilian , Francesco , Aurelia , Phoenixella , Finio . Cha.

Peace , here comes Maximilian .

Cam.

O belike that 's the Count Ferneze , that old man .

Cha.

Are those his daughters , trow ?

Cam.

I sure , I thinke they are .

Cha.

Fore God the taller is a gallant Lady .

Cam.

So are they both beleeue me .

Max.

True my honorable Lord , that Chamont was the father of this man .

Count . O that may be , for when I lost my sonne , This was but yong it seemes . Fran. Faith had Camillo liued , He had beene much about his yeares , my Lord . Count .

He had indeed , well , speake no more of him .

Max.

Signior perceiue you the errour ? t was no good office in vs to stretch the remembrance of so deere a losse . Count Ferneze , let sommer sit in your eye , looke cheerefully sweete Count , will you do me the honour to confine this noble spirit within the circle of your armes ?

Count . Honor'd Chamont reach me your valiant hand , I could haue wisht some happier accident Had made the way vnto this mutuall knowledge , Which either of vs now must take of other , But sure it is the pleasure of our fates , That we should thus be wrack't on Fortunes wheele , Let vs prepare with steeled patience To tread on torment , and with mindes confirm'd Welcome the worst of enuy . Max.

Noble Lord , t is thus . I haue here ( in mine honour ) set this gentleman free , without ransome , he is now himselfe , his valour hath deseru'd it , in the eye of my iudgement . Mounsieur Gasper you are deere to me : fortuna non mutuat genus . But to the maine , if it may square with your Lordships liking , and his loue , I could desire that he were now instantly imployed to your noble Generall in the exchange of Ferneze for your selfe , it is the businesse that requires the tender hand of a friend .

Count . I , and it would be with more speed effected , If he would vndertake it . Max.

True my Lord . Mounsieur Gasper , how stand you affected to this motion ?

Cha.

My duty must attend his Lordships will .

Max.

What sayes the Lord Chamont ?

Cam.

My will doth then apprroue what these haue vrg'd .

Max.

Why there is good harmony , good musicke in thise Mounsieur Gasper , you shall protract no time , onely I will giue you a bowle of rich wine to the health of your Generall , another to the successe of your iourney , and a third to the loue of my sword . Passe .

Exeunt all but Aurelia and Phoenixella . Anre. Why how now sister in a motley muse ? Go to , ther 's somewhat in the wind , I see . Faith this browne study suites not with your blacke , Your habit and your thoughts are of two colours . Phoen.

Good faith me thinkes that this young Lord Chamont fauours my mother , sister , does he not ?

Aure. A motherly conceite , ô blind excuse , Blinder then loue himselfe . Well sister , well . Cupid hath tane his stand in both your eyes , The case is alterd . Phoen.

And what of that ?

Aure. Nay nothing but a Saint . Another Bridget , one that for a face Would put downe Vesta , in whose lookes doth swim , The very sweetest creame of modesty . You to turne tippet ? fie , fie , will you giue A packing penny to Virginity . I thought youl 'd dwell so long in Cypres I le , You 'd worship Maddam Venus at the length ; But come , the strongest fall , and why not you ? Nay , do not frowne . Phoen.

Go . go , you foole . Adiew .

Aure. Well I may iest , or so : but Cupid knowes My taking is as bad , or worse then hers . O Mounsieur Gasper ? if thou bee'st a man , Be not affraid to court me , do but speake , Challenge thy right and weare it : for I sweare Till thou arriud'st , nere came affection here . Exit . Enter Pacue , Finio . Fin . Come on my sweet finicall Pacue , the very prime Of Pages , here 's an excellent place for vs to practise in , No body fees vs here , come le ts to it . Enter Onion . Pac.

Contenta : Reguarde , vou le Preimer .

Oni.

Sirra Finio ?

Pac.

Mort deiu le pesant .

Oni.

Didst thou see Valentine ?

Finio .

Valentine ? no .

Oni.

No ?

Fini.

No . Sirrah Onion , whither goest ?

Oni.

O I am vext , he that would trust any of these lying trauellers .

Finio .

I prithee stay good Onion .

Pac.

Mounsieur Onion , vene ca , come hidera , Ie vou prey . By gar me ha see two , tree , foure hundra towsand of your Cousan hang . Lend me your hand , shall prey for know you bettra .

Oni.

I thanke you good signior Parla vou ? O that I were in an other world , in the Ingies , or some where , that I might haue roome to laugh .

Pac.

A we fort boon : stand ? you be deere now , me come , Boon iour Mounsieur .

Vnder the arme .
Fin .

God morrow good signior .

Pac

By gar , be mush glad for see you .

Fin

I returne you most kind thanks sir .

Oni.

How ? how ? Sbloud this is rare ?

Pac.

Nay , shall make you say rare by and by , Reguard Mounsieur Finio ,

The shoulder
Fin .

Signior Pache.

Pac.

Dieu vou gard Mounsieur .

Fin .

God saue you sweet signior

Pac.

Mounsieur Onion ? is not fort boon .

Oni.

Beane ? quoth he , would I were in debt of a pottle of beanes I could do as much .

Fin .

Welcome signior , what 's next ?

Pac.

O here , Void de grand admiration , as should meet perchance Mounsieur Finio ,

Fin.

Mounsieur Pacue

Pac.

Iesu ? by Gar who thinke wee shall meete here ?

Fin .

By this hand I am not a little proud of it , sir

Oni.

This trick is onely for the the chamber , it cannot be cleanly done abroad ,

Pac.

Well what say you for dis den ? Mounsieur :

Fin.

Nay pray , sir .

Pac.

Par ma foy vou bein encounters ?

Fin

What doe you meane sir , let your gloue alone .

Pac.

Comen , se porte la sante .

Fin .

Faith exceeding well sir .

Pac ,

Trot , be mush ioy for heire .

Fin .

And how i st with you sweet signior Pache.

Pac.

Fat comme vou voyer .

Oni.

Yong gentlemen ? spirits of bloud , if euer you le tast of a sweet peece of mutton , do Onion a good turne now .

Pac.

Que que , parla Mounseir , what i st .

Oni.

Faith teach me one of these tricks .

Pac.

O me shall doe presently , stand you deere , you signior deere , my selfe is here : so fort bein , now I parle to Mounseir Onion , Onion pratla to you , you speaka to me , so , and as you parle chang the bonet , Mounseir Onion .

Oni.

Mounseiur Finio .

Fin .

Mounseur Pacue .

Pac.

Pray be couera .

Oni.

Nay I beseech you sir .

Fin .

What do you meane .

Pac.

Pardon moy , shall be so ,

Oni

O God sir .

Fin .

Not I in good faith sir .

Pac.

By gar you must .

Oni:

It shall be yours .

Fin .

Nay then you wrong me ,

Oni.

Well and euer I come to be great .

Pac.

You be big enough for de Onion already ,

Oni.

I meane a great man .

Fin .

Then thou 'dst be a monster .

Oni.

Well God knowes not what fortune may doe , commaund me , vse me from the soule to the crowne , and the crowne to the soule : meaning not onely from the crowne of the head , and the sole of the foot , but also the foote of the mind and the crownes of the purse , I cannot stay now yong gentlemen but � time was , time is , and time shall be .

Exeunt . Enter Chamount , Camillo . Cha. Sweet Iasper I am sorry we must part , But strong necessity enforceth it . Let not the time seeme long vnto my friend , Till my returne for by our loue I sweare ( The sacred spheare wherein our soules are knit ) I will endeauour to effect this busines With all industrious care and happy speed . Cam. My Lord these circumstances would come well , To one lesse capable of your desert Then I : in whom your mirrit is confirmed With such authenticall and grounded proues . Cha.

Well I will vse no more . Gasper adiew .

Cam.

Farewell my honored Lord .

Cha.

Commend me to the Lady , my good Gasper .

Cam.

I had remembred that had not you vrgd it .

Cha.

Once more adiew sweet Gasper .

Cam.

My good Lord .

Exit Camillo , Cha. Thy vertues are more precious then thy name , Kind gentleman I would not sell thy loue , For all the earthly obiects that mine eyes , Haue euer tasted , sure thou art nobly borne , How euer fortune hath obscurd thy birth : For natiue honour sparkles in thine eyes , How may I blesse the time wherein Chamont My honored father did surprise vicenza , Where this my friend ( knowen by no name ) was found , Being then a child and scarce of power to speake , To whom my father gaue this name of Gasper , And as his owne respected him to death , Since when wee two haue shard our mutuall fortunes , With equall spirits , and but deathes rude hand , No violence shall dissolue this sacred band . Exit . Enter Iuniper in his shop singing : to him Onion . Oni.

Fellow Iuniper , no more of thy songs and sonets , sweet Iuniper , no more of thy hymnes and madrigals , thou sing'st , but I sigh .

Iuni

What 's the matter Peter ha ? what in an Academy still , still in sable , and costly black array ? ha ?

Oni.

Prithee rise mount , mount sweet Iuniper , for I goe downe the wind , and yet I puffe : for I am vext .

Iuni.

Ha Bully ? vext ? what intoxicate ? is thy braine in a quintescence ? an Idea ? a metamorphosis ? an Apology ? ha rogue ? come this loue feeds vpon thee , I see by thy cheekes , and drinkes healthes of vermilion , teares I see by thine eyes .

Oni.

I confesse Cupids carouse , he plaies super negulum with my liquor of life

Iuni.

Tut , thou art a goose to be Cupids gull , go to , no more of this contemplations , & calculations , mourne not , for Rachels thine owne

Oni.

For that let the higher powers worke : but sweet Iuniper , I am not sad for her , and yet for her in a second person , or if not so yet in a third .

Iuni.

How second person ? away , away , in the crotchets already Longitude and Latitude ? what second ? what person ? ha ?

Oni.

Iuniper , I le bewray my selfe before thee , for thy company is sweet vnto me , but I must entreat thy helping hand in the case .

Iuni.

Tut ? no more of this surquedry ; I am thine owne ? ad vngem vpsie freeze : pell mell , come , what case ? what case ?

Oni.

For the case it may be any mans case , aswell as mine , Rachel I meane , but I le medle with her anon , in the meane time , Valentine is the man hath wrongd me .

Iuni.

How my Ingle wrong thee , i st possible ?

Oni.

Your Ingle , hang him infidell , well and if I be not reuengd one him let Peter Onion ( by the infernall Gods ) be turned to al eeke or a scalion , I spake to him for a ditty for this handkerchier .

Iuni.

Why , has he not done it ?

Oni.

Done it , not a verse by this hand .

Iuni.

O in dichus illis , O preposterous , wel come be blith , the best iudge of the is somtimes dul , fellow Onion pardon mine Iugle : he is a man , has imperfections and declinations , as other men haue , his masse somtimes cannot carnet nor prognisticat and come of , as it should , no matter , I le hammer our a paraphrase for thee my selfe .

Oni.

No sweet Iuniper , no danger doth breed delay , loue makes me chollericke I can beare no longer .

Iuni.

Not beare ? what my mad Meridian slaue ? not be are ? what ?

Oni.

Cupids burden : t is to heauy , to tollerable , and as for the handkerchire and the posie : I will not trouble thee : but if thou wilt goe with me into her fathers backside , old Iaques backside , and speake for me to Rachel , I wil not being ratitude , the old man is abroad and all .

Iuni.

Art thou sure on 't .

Oni.

As sure as an obligation .

Iuni.

Le ts away then , come we spend time in a vaine circumference , trade I cashire thee til to morrow , fellow Onion for thy sake I finish this workiday .

Oni.

God a mercy , and for thy sake I le at any time make a holiday .

Exunt . Enter Angelio , Rachel . Ang.

Nay I prithee Rachel , I come to comfort thee , Be not so sad .

Rach. O signior Angelo , No comfort but his presence can remoue , This sadnesse from my heart . Ang. Nay then y' are fond , And want that strength of iudgement and election , That should be attendent on your yeares and forme , Will you , because your Lord is taken prisoner , Blubber and weepe and keepe a peeuish stirre , As though you would turne turtle with the newes , Come , come , be wise . Sblood say your Lord should die : And you goe marre your face as you begin , What would you doe trow ? who would care for you ; But this it is , when nature will bestow Her gifts on such as know not how to vse them , You shall haue some that had they but one quarter Of your faire beauty ? they would make it shew A little otherwise then you do this , Or they would see the painter twice an hower , And I commend them I , that can vse art , With such iudiciall practise . Rach. You talke iedly , If this be your best comfort keepe it still , My sences cannot feede on such sower cates . Ang.

And why sweet heart .

Rach.

Nay leaue good signior .

Ang.

Come I haue sweeter vyands yet in store .

Enter Onion and Iuniper . Iuni.

I in any case mistres Rachel .

Ang.

Rachel ?

Rach.

Gods pitty signior Angelo , I here my father , away for Gods sake .

Ang:

S'bloud , I am betwixt , I thinke , this is twice now , I haue been serued thus .

Exit Rach.

Pray God he meet him not .

Exit Rechel . Oni.

O braue ? she 's yonder , O terrible shee 's gone .

Iuni.

Yea ? so nimble in your Dilemma's , and your Hiperbole's Hay my loue ? O my loue , at the first sight : By the masse .

Oni.

O how she skudded , O sweet scud , how she tripped , O delicate trip and goe .

Iuni.

Come thou art enamored with the influence of her profundity , but sirrah harke a little .

Oni.

O rare , what ? what ? passing Ifaith , what i st ? what i st ?

Iuni.

What wilt thou say now , if Rachel stand now , and play hity tity through the key hole , to behold the equipage of thy person :

Oni.

O sweet equipage , try good Iuniper , tickle her , talke , talke , O ? rare

Iuni.

Mistris Rachel ( watch then if her father come ) Rachel ? Madona ? Rachel ? No .

Oni.

Say I am here , Onion or Peter or so .

Iuni.

No , I le knock , wee le not stand vpon Horizons , and tricks , but fall roundly to the matter .

Oni.

Well said sweet Iuniper : Horizons ? hang hem ? knock , knock .

Rach.

Whos 's there ? father .

Iuni.

Father no ? and yet a father , if you please to be a mother .

Oni.

Well said Iuniper , to her againe , a smack or two more of the mother

Iuni.

Do you here ? sweet soule , sweet radamant ? sweet mathauell one word Melpomine ? are you at leasure .

Rach.

At leasure ? what to doe ?

Iuni.

To doe what , to doe nothing , but to be liable to the extasie of true loues exigent , or so , you smell my meaning .

Oni.

Smell , filthy , fellow Iuniper filthy ? smell ? O most odious .

Iuni.

How filthy .

Oni.

Filthy , by this finger ? smell ? smell a rat , smel a pudding , away these tricks are for truls , a plaine wench loues plaine dealing , I le vpon my selfe , smel to march paine wench .

Iuni.

With all my heart , I le be legitimate and silent as an apple-squire , I le see nothing , and say nothing .

Oni.

Sweet hart , sweet hart ?

Iuni.

And bag pudding , ha , ha , ha ?

Iaq.

What Rachel my girle what Rachel ;

Within
Oni.

Gods lid ?

Iaq.

What Rachel ,

Within
Rach.

Here I am

Within
Oni

What rakehell cals Rachel : O treason to my loue .

Iuni.

It s her father on my life , how shall wee entrench and edifie our selues from him ?

Oni.

O conni-catching Cupid .

Enter Iaques .
Iaq. How in my back side ? where ? what come they for ? Onion gets vp into a tree . Where are they ? Rachel ? theeues , theeues ? Stay villaine slaue : Rachel ? vntye my dog . Nay theife thou canst not scape . Iuni.

I pray you sir .

Oni.

A pitifull Onion , that thou hadst a rope .

Iaq.

Why Rachel : when I say : let loose my dog ? garlique my mastiue , let him loose I say .

Iuni.

For Gods sake here me speake , keepe vp your cur .

Oni.

I feare not garlique , hee le not bite Onion his kinsman pray God he come out , and then thei le not smell me .

Iaq.

well then deliuer , come deliuer slaue ?

Iuni.

What should I deliuer ?

Iaq.

O thou wouldst haue me tell thee ? wouldst thou shew me thy hands , what hast thou in thy hands ?

Iuni.

Here be my hands .

Iaq.

Stay are not thy fingers ends begrimd with durt , no thou hast wipt them .

Iuni.

Wipt them ?

Iaq.

I thou villaine ? thou art a subtile knaue , put off thy shewes , come I will see them , giue me a knife here Rachel , I le rip the soles .

Oni.

No matter he 's a cobler , he can mend them .

Iuni.

What are you mad ? are you detestable , would you make an Anatomy of me , thinke you I am not true Ortographie ?

Iaq.

Ortographie , Anatomy ?

Iuni.

For Gods sake be not so inuiolable , I am no ambuscado , what predicament call you this , why do you intimate so much .

Iaq.

I can feele nothing .

Oni.

Bi r Lady but Onion feeles something .

Iaq.

Soft sir , you are not yet gon , shake your legs , come , and your armes , be briefe , stay let me see these drums , these kilderkins , these bombard slops , what is it crams hem so .

Iuni.

Nothing but haire .

Iaq.

That 's true , I had almost forgot this rug , this hedghogs nest , this hay mowe , this beares skin , this heath , this firsbush .

Iuni.

O let me goe , you teare my haire , you reluolue my braines and vnderstanding .

Iaq. Heart , thou art somewhat eas'd ? halfe of my feare Hath tane his leaue of my , the other halfe Still keepes possession in dispight of hope , Vntill these amorous eyes , court my faire gold : Deare I come to thee : friend , why art not gone ? Auoid my soules vexation , Sathan hence ? Why doest thou stare on me , why doest thou stay ? Why por'st thou on the ground with theeuish eyes ? What see'st thou there , thou curre ? what gap'st thou at ? Hence from my house , Rachel , send garlick forth . Iunip.

I am gone sir , I am gone , for Gods sake stay .

Exit Iuniper . Iaq.

Pack , and thanke God thou scap'st so well away .

Oni.

If I scape this tree , destinies , I defie you .

Iaq. I cannot see by any Characters Writ on this earth , that any fellon foote Hath tane acquaintance of this hallowed ground . None sees me : knees do homage to your Lord . T is safe , t is safe , it lyes and sleepes so soundly , T would do one good to looke on 't . If this blisse Be giuen to any man that hath much gold , Iustly to say t is safe , I say t is safe . O what a heauenly round these two words dance Within me and without me : First I thinke hem , And then I speake hem , then I watch their sound , And drinke it greedily with both mine eares , Then thinke , then speake , then drinke their sound againe , And racket round about this bodies court . These two sweet words : t is safe : stay I will feed My other sences , ô how sweet it smels Oni.

I mar'le he smels not Onion , being so neere it .

Iaq. Downe to thy graue againe , thou beauteous Ghost , Angels men say , are spirits : Spirits be Inuisible , bright angels are you so ? Be you inuisible to euery eye . Saue onely these : Sleepe , I le not breake your rest , Though you breake mine : Deare Saints adiew , adiew : My feete part from you , but my soule dwels with you . Exit . Oni. Is he gone ? ô Fortune my friend , & not fortune my foe , I come downe to embrace thee , and kisse thy great toe . Enter Iuniper . Iunip.

Fellow Onion ? Peter .

Oni.

Fellow Iuniper . What 's the old panurgo gone ? departed , cosmografied , ha ?

Oni.

O I , and harke Sirrah . Shall I tell him ? no .

Iunip.

Nay , be briefe and declare , stand not vpon conodrums now , thou knowest what contagious speeches I haue sufferd for thy sake and he should come againe and inuent me here .

Oni. He saies true , it was for my sake , I will tell him . Sirra Iuniper ? and yet I will not . Iunip.

What sayest thou sweete Onion ?

Oni.

And thou hadst smelt the sent of me when I was in the tree , thou wouldest not haue said so : but Sirra , The case is alterd with me , my heart has giuen loue a box of the eare , made him kicke vp the heeles I faith .

Iunip.

Sayest thou me so , wad Greeke ? how haps it ? how chances it .

Oni.

I cannot hold it , Iuniper , haue an eye , looke , haue an eye to the doore , the old prouerb 's true , I see : gold is but mucke . Nay Gods so Iuniper to the doore , an eye to the maine chance , here you slaue , haue an eye .

Iunip.

O inexorable ! ô infallible ! ô infricate deuine , and superficiall fortune .

Oni.

Nay , it will be sufficient anon , here , looke heere .

Iunip.

O insolent good lucke ! How didst thou produce th' intelligence of the gold' mynerals .

Oni. I le tell you that anon , heere , make shift , conuey , cramme . I le teach you how you shall call for garlike againe I faith . Iunip.

S'bloud what shall we do with all this ? we shall nere bring it to a consumption .

Oni.

Consumption ? why wee le bee most sumptuously attir'd , man .

Iunip.

By this gold , I will haue three or foure most stigmaticall suites presently .

Oni.

I le go in my foot-cloth , I le turne Gentleman .

Iunip.

So will I .

Oni.

But what badge shall we giue , what cullison ?

Iunip.

As for that le ts vse the infidelity and commiseration of some harrot of armes , he shall giue vs a gudgeon .

Oni.

A gudgeon ? a scutheon thou wouldst say , man .

Iunip.

A scutcheon or a gudgeon , all is one .

Oni.

Well , our armes be good inough , le ts looke to our legges .

Iunip.

Content , wee le be iogging .

Oni.

Rachel ? we retire : garlike God boy ye .

Iunip.

Farewell sweete Iaques .

Oni.

Farewell sweete Rachel , sweet dogge adiew .

Exeunt . Enter Maximilian , Count Ferneze , Aurelia , Phoenixella , Pache. Max.

Nay but sweet Count .

Count . Away , I le heare no more , Neuer was man so palpably abusd , My sonne so basely marted ; and my selfe Am made the subiect of your mirth and scorne . Max. Count Ferneze you tread to hard vpon my patience , Do not persist I aduise your Lordship . Count . I will persist , and vnto thee I speake . Thou , Maximilian thou hast iniur'd me . Max.

Before the Lord :

Aur.

Sweet signior .

Phoe

O my father .

Mvx.

Lady let your father thank your beauty .

Pac. By gar me shall be hang for tella dis same , Metella madamoyselle , she tell her sadera . Count . The true Chamount set free , and one left here Of no descent , clad barely in his name . Sirrah boy come hither , and be sure , you speake the simple truth : Pac.

O pardone moy mounsieur ,

Count Come leaue your pardons , and directly say . What villaine is the same that hath vsurpt , The honor'd name and person of Chamount : Pac

O Mounsieur , no point villaine , braue Cheualier , Mounsieur Gasper .

Count .

Mounsieur Gasper , on what occasion did they change their names , what was their policy , or their pretext .

Pac.

Me canno tell , par ma foy Mounsieur .

Max.

My honorable Lord .

Count .

Tut tut , be silent .

Max. Silent ? Count Ferneze , I tell thee if Amurath the great Turke were here I would speake , and he should here me . Count .

So will not I .

Max.

By my fathers hand , but thou shalt Count , I say till this instant , I was neuer toucht in my reputation : here me you shall knowe that you haue wrongd me , and I will make you acknowledge it , if I cannot my sword shall .

Count . By heauen I will not , I will stop mine eares , My sences loath the Sauiour of thy breath . T is poyson to me , I say I will not heare . What shall I know , t is you haue iniurd me , What will you make ? make me acknowledge it . Fetch forth that Gasper , that lewd counterfeit . Enter seruing with Camillo . I le make him to your face approue your wrongs . Come on false substance , shadow to Chamont : Had you none else to worke vpon but me , Was I your fittest proiect ? well confesse , What you intended by this secret plot . And by whose policy it was contriu'd , Speake truth , and be intreated courteously , But double with me , and resolue to proue The extremest rigor that I can inflict . Cam. My honor'd Lord , heare me with patience , Nor hope of fauour , not the feare of torment , Shall sway my tongue , from vttring of a truth . Count .

T is well , proceed then .

Cam. The morne before this battell did begin , Wherein my Lord Chamount and I were tane , We vow'd one mutuall fortune , good or bad , That day should be imbraced of vs both , And vrging that might worst succeede our vow , We there concluded to exchange our names . Count .

Then Maximilian tooke you for Chamount .

Cam.

True noble Lord .

Count . T is false , ignoble wretch , T was but a complot to betray my sonne . Max. Count , thou lyest in thy bosome , Count : Count .

Lye ?

Cam. Nay I beseech you honor'd gentlemen , Let not the vntimely ruine of your loue , Follow these sleight occurents ; be assured Chamounts returne will heale these wounds againe , And breake the points of your too piercing thoughts . Count . Returne ? I when ? when will Chamount returne ? Hee le come to fetch you , will he ? I t is like , Youl 'd haue me thinke so , that 's your policy . No , no , yong gallant , your deuice is stale , You cannot feed me with so vaine a hope . Cam. My Lord , I feede you not with a vaine hope , I know assuredly he will returne , And bring your noble sonne along with him . Max.

I , I dare pawne my soule he will returne .

Count . O impudent dirision ? open scorne ? Intollerable wrong ? is 't not inough ? That you haue plaid vpon me all this while ; But still to mocke me , still to iest at me ? Fellowes , away with him , thou ill-bred slaue , That sets no difference twixt a noble spirit , And thy owne slauish humour , do not thinke But I le take worthy vengeance on thee , wretch ? Cam. Alas , these threats are idle , like the wind , And breed no terror in a guiltlesse mind . Count .

Nay , thou shalt want no torture , so resolue , bring him away .

Cam. Welcome the worst , I suffer for a friend , Your tortures will , my loue shall neuer end . Exeunt . Manent Maximillian , Aurelia , Phoenixella , Pacue . Phoen. Alas poore gentleman , my fathers rage Is too extreame , too sterne and violent O that I knew with all my strongest powers , How to remoue it from thy patient breast , But that I cannot , yet my willing heart , Shall minister in spight of tyranny To thy misfortune , something there is in him , That doth enforce this strange affection , With more then common rapture in my breast : For being but Gasper , he is still as deare To me , as when he did Chamount appeare . Exit Phoenixella . Aure.

But in good sadnesse Signior , do you thinke Chamount will returne ?

Max.

Do I see your face , Lady ?

Aure.

I sure , if loue haue not blinded you .

Max.

That is a question , but I will assure you no , I can see , and yet loue is in mine eye : well , the Count your father simply hath dishonor'd me : and this steele shall engraue it on his burgonet .

Aure.

Nay , sweet Signior .

Max. Lady , I do preferre my reputation to my life , But you shall rule me , come le ts march . Exit Maximillian . Aure. I le follow Signior , ô sweet Queene of loue ! Soueraigne of all my thoughts , and thou faire fortune , Who ( more to honour my affections ) Hast thus translated Gasper to Chamount . Let both your flames now burne in one bright speare ; And giue true light to my aspiring hopes , Hasten Chamounts returne , let him affect me , Though father , friends , and all the world reiect me . Exit . Enter Angelo , Christopher . Ange. Sigh for a woman , would I fould mine armes , Raue in my sleepe , talke idly being awake , Pine and looke pale , make loue-walkes in the night , To steale cold comfort from a day-starres eyes . Kit , thou art a foole , wilt thou be wise ? then lad Renounce this boy-gods nice idolatry , Stand not on complement , and wooing trickes , Thou louest old Iaques daughter , doest thou ? Chris.

Loue her ?

Ange. Come , come , I know 't , be rul'd and shee s thine owne , Thou't say her father Iaques , the old begger , Hath pawnd his word to thee , that none but thou , Shalt be his sonne in law . Chris.

He has .

Ange. He has ? wilt thou beleeue him , and be made a kooke , To waite on such an antique wether cocke ; Why he is more inconstant then the sea , His thoughts , Cameleon-like , change euery minute : No Kit , worke soundly , steale the wench away , Wed her , and bed her , and when that is done , Then say to Iaques , shall I be your sonne ? But come to our deuise , where is this gold ? Chris.

Heere Signior Angelo .

Ange. Bestow it , bid thy hands shed golden drops , Let these bald french crownes be vncouered , In open sight , to do obeysance To Iaques staring eyes when he steps forth , The needy beggar will be glad of gold . So , now keepe thou aloose , and as he treades This guilded path , stretch out his ambling hopes , With scattring more & more , & as thou go'st , cry Iaques , Iaques Chris.

Tust , let me alone .

Ang.

First I le play the ghost , I le cal him out , Kit keep aloofe .

Chris.

But Signior Angelo . Where wil your selfe and Rachel stay for me , after the iest is ended ?

Ange.

Masse , that 's true , at the old Priory behinde S. Foyes .

Chris.

Agreed , no better place , I le meete you there .

Ange. Do good foole , do , but I le not meet you there . Now to this geere , Iaques , Iaques , what Iaques ? within Iaq.

Who cals ? whos 's there ?

Ange.

Iaques .

within Iaq.

Who cals ?

Ange.

Steward , he comes , he comes Iaques .

Enter Iaques . Iaq. What voice is this ? no body here , was I not cald ? I was . And one cride Iaques with a hollow voyce , I was deceiu'd , no I was not deceiu'd , See see , it was an Angell cald me forth , Gold , gold , man-making gold , another starre , Drop they from heauen , no , no , my house I hope Is haunted with a Fairy . My deere Lar , My houshold God , My Fairy on my knees . Christ .

Iaques .

Exit Christopher . Iaq. My Lar doth call me , ô sweet voyce . Musicall as the spheares , see , see , more gold . within Chris.

Iaques .

Enter Rachel .
Iaq.

What Rachel , Rachel , lock my doore , looke to my house .

within Chris.

Iaques .

Iaq.

Shut fast my doore , a golden crowne , Iaques shall be a king .

Exit . Ange. To a fooles paradice that path will bring Thee and thy houshold Lar . Rach.

What means my father , I wonder what strange humor .

Ange.

Come sweete soule , leaue wondring , start not , t was I laid this plot to get thy father forth .

Rach.

O Angelo .

Ange. O me no oo's , but heare , my Lord your loue , Paulo Ferneze is returnd from warre , Lingers at Pont Valeria , and from thence By post at midnight last , I was coniur'd To man you thither , stand not on replies , A horse is sadled for you , will you go , And I am for you , if you will stay , why so . Rach.

O Angelo , each minute is a day till my Ferneze come , come wee le away sir .

Ange. Sweet soule I guesse thy meaning by thy lookes , At pont Valerio thou thy loue shalt see , But not Ferneze , Steward fare you well . You wait for Rachel to , when can you tell ? Exeunt . Enter Iaq. Iaq. O in what golden circle haue I dan'st ? Millaine these od'rous and enfloured fields Are none of thine , no here 's Elizium , Heere blessed ghosts do walke , this is the Court And glorious palace where the God of gold Shines like the sonne , of sparkling maiesty ; O faire fethered , my red-brested birds , Come flye with me , I le bring you to a quier , Whose consort being sweetned with your sound : The musique will be fuller , and each hower These eares shall banquet with your harmony ô , ô , ô , Enter Christ . Chris. At the old priorie , behind Saint Foyes , That was the place of our appointment sure : I hope he will not make me loose my gold , And mock me to , perhaps they are within : I le knock . Iaq.

O God , the case is alterd .

Christ .

Rachel ?

Angelo ?

Signior Angelo ?

Iaq. Angels ? I where ? mine Angels ? wher 's my gold ? Why Rachel ? O thou theeuish Canibal , Thou eatest my flesh in stealing of my gold . Chris.

What gold ?

Iaq. What gold ? Rachel call help , come forth , I le rip thine entrailes , but I le haue my gold : Rachel why comes thou not ? I am vndone , Ay me she speakes not , thou hast slaine my child . Exit Chris. What is the man possest trow ? this is strange , Rachel I see is gone with Angelo : Well I le once againe vnto the priory , And see if I can meete them . Exit Christopher , Iaq. T is too true , Enter Iaques Th' ast made away my child , how hast my gold : O what Hienna cald me out of dores , The theife is gone : my gold 's gone , Rachels gone , Al 's gone ? saue I that spend my cries in vaine , But I le hence too , and die or end this paine . Exit . Enter Iuniper , Onion , Finio , Valentine . Iuni. Swonds , let me goe , hay catso , catch him aliue , I call , I call , boy , I come , I come sweet heart . Oni.

Page hold my rapier , while I hold my freind here .

Valen.

O heer 's a sweet metamorphosis , a cupple of buzzards turn'd to a paire of peacocks .

Iuni.

Signior Onion , lend me thy boy to vnhang my rapier . On Signior Iuniper for once or so , but troth is , you must inueigle , as I haue done , my Lords page here a poor folower of mine .

Iuni.

Hei ho , your page then sha'not be super intendent vpon me ? he shall not be addicted ? he shall not be incident ? he shall not be incident ? he shall not be incident , shall he ?

Fin . O sweet signior Iuniper . He foynes Iuni Sbloud stand away princocks ? do not aggrauate my ioy . Valen.

Nay good Maister . Onion .

Oni.

Nay and he haue the heart to draw my bloud , let him come .

Iuni.

I le slice you Onion , I le slice you ?

Oni.

I le cleaue you Iuniper .

Valen.

Why hold , hold , hough ? what do you meane ?

Iuni.

Let him come Ingle , stand by boy , his allebaster blad cannot feare me .

Fin .

Why heare you sweet signior , let not there be any conte�tion , betweene my Maister & you , about me , if you want a page sir , I can helpe you to a proper stripling .

Iuni.

Canst thou ? what parentage ? what ancestry ? what genealogy is he ?

Fin .

A french boy sir .

Iuni.

Has he his French linguist ? has he ?

Fin .

I , sir .

Iuni.

Then transport him : her 's a crusado for thee .

Oni.

You will not , imbecell my seruant with your beneuolence will you , hold boy their 's a portmantu for thee .

Fin .

Lord sir .

On.

Do take it boy , it s three pounds ten shill. a portmantu .

Fin .

I thanke your Lordship .

Exit Finio . Iuni. Sirrah Ningle : thou art a traueller , and I honour thee . I prithee discourse ? cherish thy muse ? discourse ? Valen.

Of what sir ?

Iuni.

Of what thou wilt . Sbloud ? hang sorrow ?

Oni.

Prithy Valentine assoile me one thing .

Valen.

T is pitty to soile you sir , your new apparell .

On.

Masse thou saist true , aparel makes a man forget himself .

Iun.

Begin , find your tongue Ningle .

Val. Now will gull these ganders rarely : Gentlemen hauing in my peregrinatio� through Mesopotamia . Iun. Speake legibly , this gam 's gone , without the great mercy of God , Here 's a fine tragedy indeed . Ther 's a Keisars royall . By Gods lid , nor King nor Keisar shall ? Enter Finio , Pacue , Balt . Martino . Balt.

Where ? where ? Finio , where be they .

Iun.

Go to , I le be with you anon .

Oni.

O her 's the page signior Iuniper :

Iun.

What sayth monsier Onion , boy .

Fin .

What say you sir .

Iuni.

Tread out boy .

Fin .

Take vp , you meane sir .

Iun.

Tread out I say , so , I thanke you , is this the boy .

Pac.

Aue mounsieur .

Iuni.

Who gaue you that name .

Pac.

Giue me de name , vat name :

Oni.

He thought your name had been , we yong gentlemen , you must do more then his legges can do for him , beare with him sir .

Iuni.

Sirrah giue me instance of your carriage ? you le serue my turne , will you ?

Pac.

What ? turne vpon the toe .

Fin .

O signior no .

Iuni.

Page will you follow me , I le giue you good exhibition .

Pac.

By gar , shal not alone follow you , but shal leade you to .

Oni.

Plaguie boy , he sooths his humour ? these french villaines ha pockie wits .

Iuni.

Here ? disarme me ? take my semitary .

Valen.

O rare , this would be a rare man , and he had a little trauell , Balthasar , Martino , put off your shooes , and bid him coble them .

Iuni.

Freinds , friends , but pardon me for fellows , no more in occupation , no more in corporation , t is so pardon me , the case is alterd , this is law , but I le stand to nothing .

Pac.

Fat so me tinke .

Iuni.

Well then God saue the dukes Maiesty , is this any harme now ? speake , is this any harme now .

Oni.

No nor good neither , Sbloud ?

Iuni.

Do you laugh at me ? do you laugh at me ? do you laugh at me ?

Valen.

I sir , we do .

Iunip.

You do indeed ?

Valen.

I indeed sir .

Iuni.

T is sufficient , Page carry my purse , dog me ?

Exit . Oni.

Gentlemen leaue him not , you see in what case he is , he is not in aduersity , his purse is full of money , leaue him not ?

Enter Angelo with Rachel . Exeunt Ang.

Nay gentle Rachel ?

Rach. Away ? forbeare ? vngentle Angelo , Touch not my body , with those impious hands , That like hot Irons seare my trembling heart , And make it hisse , at your disloyalty . Enter Chamount Paulo Ferneze . Was this your drift ? to vse Fernezes name ? Was he your fittest stale , ô wild dishonor ! Pau.

Stay noble sir ?

Ange. Sbloud how like a puppet do you talke now ? Dishonor ? what dishonor ? come , come , foole , Nay then I see y' are peeuish , S'heart dishonor ? To haue you to a priest and marry you , And put you in an honorable state . Rach. To marry me ? ô heauen , can it be ? That men should liue with such vnfeeling soules , Without or touch or conscience of religion , Or that their warping appetites should spoile Those honor'd formes , that the true seale of friendship Had set vpon their faces . Ange.

Do you heare ? what needs all this ? say , will you haue me , or no ?

Rach.

I l'e haue you gone , and leaue me , if you would .

Ange. Leaue you ? I was accurst to bring you hither , And make so faire an offer to a foole . A pox vpon you , why should you be coy , What good thing haue you in you to be proud of ? Are y'any other then a beggars daughter ? Because you haue beauty . O Gods light a blast . Pau.

I Angelo .

Ange.

You scornefull baggage , I lou'd thee not so much , but now I hate thee .

Rach. Vpon my knees , you heauenly powers , I thanke you , That thus haue tam'd his wild affections . Ange. This will not do , I must to her againe , Rachel , ô that thou sawst my heart , or didst behold , The place from whence that scalding sigh euented . Rachel , by Iesu I loue thee as my soule , Rachel , sweet Rachel . Rach.

What againe returnd vnto this violent passion .

Ange.

Do but heare me , by heauen I loue you Rachel .

Rach.

Pray forbeare , ô that my Lord Ferneze were but here .

Ange.

Sbloud and he were , what would he do .

Pau.

This would he do base villaine .

Rach.

My deere Lord ,

Pau. Thou monster , euen the soule of trechery ! O what dishonord title of reproch , May my tongue spit in thy deserued face ? Me thinkes my very presence should inuert , The steeled organs of those traytrous eyes , To take into thy heart , and pierce it through : Turn'st thou them on the ground ? wretch , dig a graue , With their sharp points , to hide th' abhorred head ; Sweet loue , thy wrongs haue beene too violent Since my departure from thee , I perceiue : But now true comfort shall againe appeare , And like an armed angell guard thee safe From all th' assaults of couered villany . Come Mounsieur , let 's go , & leaue this wretch to his despaire . Ange.

My noble Ferneze .

Pau. What canst thou speake to me , and not thy tongue , Forc't with the torment of thy guilty soule Breake that infected circle of thy mouth , Like the rude clapper of a crazed bell . I , that in thy bosome lodg'd my soule , With all her traine of secrets , thinking them To be as safe , and richly entertained , As in a Princes court , or tower of strength , And thou to proue a traitor to my trust , And basely to expose it , ô this world ! Ange.

My honorable Lord .

Pau. The very owle , who� other birds do stare & wonder at , Shall hoot at thee , and snakes in euery bush Shall deafe thine eares with their � Cha.

Nay good my Lord , giue end vnto your passions .

Ange.

You shall see , I will redeeme your lost opinion .

Rach.

My Lord beleeue him .

Cha. Come , be satisfied , sweet Lord you know our haste , Let vs to horse , the time for my engaged returne is past ; Be friends againe , take him along with you . Pau.

Come signior Angelo , hereafter proue more true .

Exeunt . Enter Count Ferneze , Maximillian , Francesco . Count . Tut Maximillian , for your honor'd selfe , I am perswaded , but no words shall turne The edge of purposd vengeance on that wretch , Come , bring him forth to execution . Enter Camillo bound , with seruants I le hang him for my sonne , he shall not scape , Had he an hundred liues : Tell me vile slaue , Thinkest thou I loue my sonne ? is he my flesh ? Is he my bloud , my life ? and shall all these be torturd for thy sake , and not reueng'd ? trusse vp the villaine . Max. My Lord , there is no law to confirme this action . T is dishonorable . Count . Dishonorable ? Maximilian ? It is dishonorable in Chamount , the day of his prefixt returne is past , and he shall pay for t . Cam. My Lord , my Lord , Vse your extreamest vengeance , I le be glad To suffer ten times more , for such a friend . Count .

O resolute and peremptory wretch !

Fran.

My honored Lord , let vs intreat a word .

Count . I le heare no more , I say he shall not liue , My selfe will do it . Stay , what forme is this Stands betwixt him and me , and holds my hand . What miracle is this ? t is my owne fancy , Carues this impression in me , my soft nature , That euer hath retaind such foolish pitty , Of the most abiect creatures misery , That it abhorres it , what a child am I To haue a child ? Ay me , my son , my son . Enter Christophero . Chris. O my deere loue , what is become of thee ? What vniust absence layest thou on my brest , Like waights of lead , when swords are at my backe , That run me through with thy vnkind flight , My gentle disposition waxeth wild , I shall run frantike , ô my loue , my loue . Enter Iaques . Iaq. My gold , my gold , my life , my soule , my heauen , What is become of thee ? see , I le impart My miserable losse to my good Lord , Let me haue search my Lord , my gold is gone . Count . My sonne , Christophero , thinkst it possible , I euer shall behold his face againe . Chris. O father wher 's my loue , were you so carelesse To let an vnthrift steale away your child . Iaq. I know your Lordship may find out my gold , For Gods sake pitty me , iustice , sweet Lord . Count . Now they haue yong Chamount ? Christophero ? Surely they neuer will restore my sonne . Chris.

Who would haue thought you could haue beene so carelesse to loose your onely daughter .

Iaq. Who would thinke , That looking to my gold with such hares eyes , That euer open , I euen when thy sleepe , I thus should loose my gold , my noble Lord , what saies your Lordship ? Count .

O my sonne , my sonne .

Chris.

My deerest Rachel ?

Iaq.

My most hony gold .

Count .

Heare me Christophero .

Chris.

Nay heare me Iaques .

Iaq.

Heare me most honor'd Lord .

Max.

What rule is here ?

Count .

O God that we should let Chamount escape .

Enter Aurelia , Phoenixella . Chris.

I and that Rachel , such a vertuous mayd , should be thus stolne away .

Iaq.

And that my gold , being so hid in earth , should bee found out .

Max.

O confusion of languages , & yet no tower of Babel !

Fran.

Ladies , beshrew me , if you come not fit to make a iangling consort , will you laugh to see three constant passions .

Max.

Stand by , I will vrge them , sweet Count , will you be comforted .

Count . It cannot be but he is handled the most cruelly , That euer any noble prisoner was . Max.

Steward , go cheere my Lord :

Chris.

Well , if Rachel tooke her flight willingly ?

Max.

Sirrah , speake you touching your daughters flight ?

Iaq.

O that I could so soone forget to know the thiefe againe , that had my gold , my gold .

Max.

Is not this pure ?

Count . O thou base wretch , I le drag thee through the streets . Enter Balthasar , and whispers with him . And as a monster , make thee wondred at , how now . Phoen. Sweet Gentleman ? how too vnworthily Art thou thus tortured , braue Maximillian , Pitty the poore youth and appease my father , Count . How , my sonne returnd ? O Maximillian , Francisco , daughters ? bid him enter here . Enter Chamount , Ferneze , Rachel , Angelo . Dost thou not mocke me ? O my deere Paulo welcome . Max.

My Lord Chamount ?

Cha.

My Gasper .

Chris.

Rachel .

Iaq.

My gold Rachel ? my gold ?

Count

Some body bid the begger cease his noise .

Chris. O signior Angelo , would you deceiue Your honest friend , that simply trusted you ? Well Rachel : I am glad tho' art here againe . Ang.

I faith she is not for you steward .

Iaq.

I beseech you maddam vrge your father .

Phoe.

I will anon ? good Iaques be content .

Aur. Now God a mercy fortune , and sweet Venus , Let Cupid do his part , and all is well . Phoe.

Me thinks my heart 's in heauen with this comfort .

Cha. Is this the true Italian courtesie . Ferneze were you torturd thus in France ? by my soules safety . Count :

My most noble Lord ? I do beseech your Lordship .

Cha. Honored Count , wrong not your age with flexure of a knee , I do impute it to those cares and griefes , That did torment you in your absent sonne . Count . O worthy gentlemen , I am shamd That my extreame affection to my sonne , Should giue my honour so vncur'd a maine , But my first sonne , being in Vicenza lost . Cha. How in Vicenza ? lost you a sonne there ? About what time my Lord ? Count .

O the same night , wherein your noble father tooke the towne .

Cha.

How long 's that since my Lord ? can you remember .

Count .

T is now well nie vpon the twentith yeare .

Cha.

And how old was he then ?

Count .

I cannot tel , betweene the yeares of three and soure , I take it .

Cha. Had he no speciall note in his attire , Or otherwise , that you can call to mind . Count I cannot well remember his attire , But I haue often heard his mother say : He had about his necke a tablet , Giuen to him by the Emperour Sigismund . His Godfather , with this inscription , Vnder the figure of a siluer Globe : En minimo , mundus . Cha.

How did you call your sonne my Lord ?

Count

Camillo Lord Chamount .

Cha. Then no more my Gasper ? but Camillo , Take notice of your father , gentlemen : Stand not amazd ? here is a tablet , With that inscription ? found about his necke That night , and in Vicenza by my father , ( Who being ignorant , what name he had ) Christned him Gasper , nor did I reueale , This secret till this hower to any man . Count .

O happy reuelation ? ô blest hower ? ô my Camillo .

Phoe.

O strange my brother .

Fran.

Maximilion ? behold how the aboundance of his ioy Drownds him in teares of gladnesse .

Count .

O my boy ? forgiue thy fathers late austerity :

Max.

My Lord ? I deliuered as much before , but your honour would not be perswaded , I will heareafter giue more obseruance to my visions ? I drempt of this .

Iaq. I can be still no longer , my good Lord , Do a poore man some grace mongst all your ioyes . Count .

Why what 's the matter Iaques .

Iaq. I am robd , I am vndone my Lord , robd and vndone : A heape of thirty thousand golden crownes , Stolne from me in one minute , and I feare : By her confedracy , that cals me father , But she 's none of mine , therefore sweet Lord : Let her be tortured to confesse the truth . Max.

More wonders yet .

Count .

How Iaques is not Rachel then thy daughter .

Iaq.

No , I disclaime in her , I spit at her ,

Machine-generated castlist A04638-onion 139 A04638-juniper 117 A04638-count 104 A04638-angelo 67 A04638-jaques 62 A04638-christophero 60 A04638-valentine 55 A04638-maximilian 52 A04638-paulo 36 A04638-pacue 35 A04638-finio 29 A04638-rachel 25 A04638-aurelia 25 A04638-chamont 23 A04638-camillo 20 A04638-antonio 17 A04638-sebastian 16 A04638-phoenixella 14 A04638-francisco 12 A04638-balthazar 11 A04638-nuntius 8 A04638-martino 6 A04638-boy 4 A04638-omnes 2 A04638-multiple 2 A04638-vincentio 1 A04638-balladino 1 A04638-maxmilian 1
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anotable Rascal , a true dunce , marry he hath bene a notable vilaine in his time : he is in loue awench his time : he is in loue , sirrah , with a wench , & I haue preferd thee to him , thou � Pageant Poet to the City of Millaine sir , are you . aworse I supply the place sir : when a worse cannot be had sir . Valentiue What Valentine ? fellow Onion , take my dish I prithee ��� I all ; no ��� and he haue a nimble tong , if he practise ��� I all ; ��� marle and he haue a nimble tong , if he practise Chrristophero Enter Christophero . Rsceiue thee , As to my genius , or my other soule . Receiue hi gentle loue and what deffects , My absence Faiah Faith tell me Angelio how dost thou like her ? se� Nay then thy iudgement is to meene , I see: : Didst thou neare read in difference of hauuted poore slaue lookes , as though He had bene haunted by the spirit Lar , Or seene the ghost of Spoke me yet , I maruell , why these gallant youths Spoke me so faire , and I esteemd a beggar ? The wil� This wench will solicite for my selfe , Making my Lord and atrire Sister , these words become not your attire , Nor your estate : our vertuous mothers �n That tramples on al loue with such contempt in this faire breast . � faith my Lord , your honour may suspect it � but � Valeniine is the manner of it ( for gods loue ) good Valentine ? notrob'd Tis safe , tis safe , they haue not rob'd my treasure . feeme Let it not seeme offensiue to you sir . Vieenza the poore Marchants traffique vp ? First in Vicenza , lost I my first sonne ; Next here in Millaine � Cannot containe them . But this is my loue : I must make loue to Rachel , heauen hath ascuttle Enter Iaques with his gold and a scuttle full of horse-dung . ne�t horse-dung : Who will suppose that such a precious nest Is crownd with such a dunghill excrement Chamoun� bon : excellenta gull , he tak'a my Lord Chamount for Mounsieur Gaspra , & Mounsieur Gaspra mothelry A motherly conceite , ô blind excuse , Blinder then Oniou Enter Onion . Theshoulder The shoulder �f , and yet for her in a second person , or if not so yet in a third . ��lentine medle with her anon , in the meane time , Valentine is the man hath wrongd me . �est O preposterous , wel come be blith , the best iudge of the is somtimes dul , fellow Onion iud�� preposterous , wel come be blith , the best iudge of the is somtimes dul , fellow Onion pardon in pefections Onion pardon mine Iugle : he is a man , has imperfections and declinations , as other men haue , his paral�rase it should , no matter , Ile hammer our a paraphrase for thee my selfe . ��� No sweet Iuniper , no danger doth breed delay , loue makes me chollericke �cashire spend time in a vaine circumference , trade I cashire thee til to morrow , fellow Onion for thy fini�� til to morrow , fellow Onion for thy sake I finish this workiday . anapple-squire my heart , Ile be legitimate and silent as an apple-squire , Ile see nothing , and say � Gods lid ? Fnter Enter Maximilian , Count Ferneze , Aurelia , Phoenixella abuld heare no more , Neuer was man so palpably abusd , My sonne so basely marted ; and my selfe madamoy selle shall be hang for tella dis same , Metella madamoyselle , she tell her sadera . � Count , thou lyest in thy bosome , Count : a spiring bright speare ; And giue true light to my aspiring hopes , Hasten Chamounts returne man � making was an Angell cald me forth , Gold , gold , man-making gold , another starre , Drop they Christopher� Exit Christopher. . . po�t soule I guesse thy meaning by thy lookes , At pont Valerio thou thy loue shalt see , But not ��� hot Irons seare my trembling heart , And make it hisse , at your disloyalty . Wa� Was ��� your drift ? to vse Fernezes name ? ��� Wa� this your drift ? to vse Fernezes name ? {gap-unknown} � Stay noble sir ? a topriest peeuish , S'heart dishonor ? To haue you to a priest and marry you , And put you in a topriest peeuish , S'heart dishonor ? To haue you to a priest and marry you , And put you in an honorable sarisfied Come , be satisfied , sweet Lord you know our haste , Let vs withseruants Enter Camillo bound , with seruants Max imillian Dishonorable ? Maximilian ? It is dishonorable in Chamount , the day � Is not this pure ? minnte thousand golden crownes , Stolne from me in one minute , and I feare : By her confedracy , that