Lets be better than yesterday
Who Am I? Where do I belong? How can I be someone that others desire to belong with? Over the course of these last ten weeks, I have put myself through a great deal of change, growth, and self-reflection. Through my QQC reflections, I have responded to many different topics that I wouldn’t normally indulge in, this created space for even deeper thought. I’ve realized how important it is to take a step back and think. In this essay, I will discuss who I was, who I am, and who I want to be. I will also develop on what I have learned in Moreau this year so far through conversations with my classmates (whom I would already consider good friends), and through my thoughtful QQC assignments.
	Saying goodbye to my best friends, holding on to every last second of my youth before shipping out to Notre Dame was difficult. The bonds I had with these certain fellas seemed unmatchable. We were all dispersing to our perspective schools and all the consistency I had ever felt was washing away in parallel. A new journey was ahead of me, me alone. 
	My biggest challenge throughout this semester has been knowing my worth. I find myself studying copious amounts of hours just to receive below-average grades. The academics here at Notre Dame can be defeating. I ask myself often if I’m good enough or if I belong here. Outside sources such as family and friends remind me that belonging has nothing to do with grades or status. A quote from week one, “The people that have a strong sense of love and belonging, believe they are worthy of love and belonging.” reminds me that the first step to me feeling my worth and belonging is confidence. Although I am no longer at the top of my class like many other students in their high schools were, believing that I am a smart and worthy individual is fundamental to my happiness. Self positivity is something I am working on and will continue to work on throughout this new journey. I will continue to be positive but also be aware that certain attributes and negative attitudes are nothing to be positive about. 
	My relationships and friendship got off to a slow start. I felt like I didn’t have many people to talk to and found myself on the phone with friends from home maybe a little too often. Although I miss the mountains back home, I believe that the people around you can make any place terrible, tolerable, or great. After the culture in my new and reestablished dorm started to develop, so did my friendships. I believe I have a good friend in every hallway of my building and at least six great friends to turn to if I were to ever need anything. This brings me confidence and a sense of home. These new friends have also taught me a lot about myself and they have shown me my own identity, not the identity I shared with my friends from high school. This quote from week three correlates to me meeting new people, “The greatest journey you will ever go on, is one of self-discovery.” The words self-discovery make it sound like it is a process that needs to be done alone, however, this is far from the truth. New friendships and new interactions make it easier to learn about yourself tenfold. I will walk with others at the university as we all try find ourselves and who we are.
	Relationships should always be a two-way street, therefor I must strive to be the support system and good friend that I wish to have from someone else. Sometimes it is easy and convenient to use people to get what you want. I believe that it is best to take a step back and put yourself in their shoes. I believe that most people are good and treating all with respect and empathy puts you on a great path to starting and building great relationships. Don't look at people as their “single story” but invest in who they really are and who they aspire to be. Support their aspirations and be willing to be vulnerable in your interactions.
	I want to be a man of God, who is kind in his ways and forgiving like the Lord. Throughout my life, I have struggled with mentorship. It wasn't until high school that I found someone that I looked up to. I want to be a person that the younger generation can look up to and find support and friendship with. In order to do this, I must start to better myself now. So when I have kids one day they don't have to seek a mentor but were born with one.
	What can I do with this new knowledge I have developed about myself and about life? The reason I am at Notre Dame is to get a degree, but I have realized that it is more important to be a kind and loving person to others rather than getting an A on my calc test. Whereas if I am being a jerk to others and also getting a D on my calc test, that's when I’ll need some serious reflection. The relationships that I aspire to build here are ones to last a life time and this starts by being my true authentic self. My authentic self through personal shaping, “My framework has always been staying true to myself despite other thoughts and opinions, but now I feel that I need to better myself before being myself.” This requires constant self reflection. To be who I aspire to be, a loving, kind and caring individual, there will never be a finish line. Every day will be a battle to be a better person than I was the day before. I will do this through the strength that God instills upon me and the support of my new and old friends and family.
Make it large - Mushfiq Milan