Moreau Week 14 Capstone Integration
One notion which was very important to me in my mission statement was the idea that the transformation of self is just as, if not more, important than the transformation I could make of the world. I believe that I must first become a good man before trying to become a great one. This is because it is impossible to do great things without being morally grounded, as Father Hesburgh say, “Our words are buttressed by our deeds, and our deeds are inspired by our convictions” (Conaghan quoting Hesburgh – Week Two). We must know what be believe and be deeply convicted about it before we can affect change with it in the world. 
Another requirement I have found for a life well lived is the need for rest and quiet in my own life. As I reflected, I have thought about how all my day is filled with media. Even walking to class I will be listening to music or a podcast. This became an issue for me because I became a person who would listen to things “to serve their own emotional and intellectual needs. They’re not trying to move anyone. They’re not trying to empower anything. They’re really just trying to learn and engage in a pretty frivolous way” (Hersh – Week 11). I became addicted to just having that constant noise in my ear. This has been something I have tried to become more intentional about recently, because I have realized that what we listen to has a real impact on who we are. I recognize that “The need for an empty space, a pause, is something we have all felt in our bones; it’s the rest in a piece of music that gives it resonance and shape” (Iyer – Week One). This is a very similar sentiment to a Blaise Pascal quote about all of man’s problems centering on the inability to sit quietly alone in a room. I have made a specific goal of trying to leave time in my day to relax and be away from media.
This free time has allowed me to do more self-reflection. We are never perfect and never will be, but one of the most important things I heard in this course is that “Asking what could keep us open to discovering new information about ourselves, even if that information is negative or in conflict with our existing beliefs. Asking why might have the opposite effect” (Eurich – Week Six). By just asking why, we put ourselves in a victim mentality which won’t bring about change as we do not see ourselves in the wrong. Life will be far more rewarding if we take ownership of everything which we have even the smallest control over. It prevents us from feeling helpless, and gives the motivation for constant improvement. This extra time to reflect has also kept me busy thinking about my future career. When I came to college, I knew what I liked but did not necessarily know what I wanted to do with it so this time has been important to me to be able to at least attempt to plan. I have found that treating this process with its necessary gravity has helped me think about my future in a much more realistic and thoughtful way (Career Development Center – Week Four).
Throughout this year I have also learned about the friendships necessary for a life well lived. Coming into Notre Dame, I knew a few people, but none of them very well. I was pretty much starting fresh, and it was tough in the beginning. Even as I got to know people here better, many of my new relationships started to feel very shallow. Although for different reasons, I felt very similar to Jacob Walsh, who says his relationships were shallow “partly out of fear that someone would find out about this secret part of my life; but mostly because until I could be honest with myself, I could not let myself be loved as I was” (Walsh – Week 10). Because of things that happened earlier in my life, I am a very emotionally guarded person, and though I recognize how those things shaped me, going back to the asking what instead of why, I realized these things need to be changed, no matter how upsetting they may be to deal with. Even if I do not like parties, I recognize “that each and everyone’s existence is deeply tied to that of others: life is not merely time passing by, life is about interactions” (Pope Francis – Week Seven). I will never be complete sitting in my room all day, even if my personality can handle it for a longer amount of time than most others. This difficulty with building new relationships also made me no longer take for granted the special friendships I had made with my friends back home. If anything, being apart from them has made me realize their importance and allowed to become closer. It has meant helping them over the phone, and accompanying them through problems with no easy answer when I am far away (Reifenberg – Week 9). 
My final thoughts on a life well lived have to do with the final parts of everyone’s life: death. We do not know when it will come, and most people fear it to some degree or another. The pandemic we are coming out of is a great example of how the fear of death can cause paranoia, even if some measures were in fact good. It is important that we remember and think about our death because “Remembering death keeps us awake, focused, and ready for whatever might happen — both the excruciatingly difficult and the breathtakingly beautiful” (Graham – Week Three). If we forget about our mortality, our life in a way becomes meaningless. We fail to recognize that there is good we are called to do in the short time we have on earth. By remembering death, our priorities become best aligned with virtue, which is important as “For the kingdom to come in this world, disciples must have the competence to see and the courage to act” (Congregation of the Holy Cross – Week 12). This courage comes when we do not fear death, but rather when we go out into the world ready to share the gospel with fortitude.