Microsoft Word - Moreau Integration Two Assignment Dr. Vanessa Chan Moreau First Year Experience: Integration Two Assignment November 26, 2021 “Encountering Community… and Myself?!?!” In my Integration One Assignment, I began by stating that I felt that I had experienced some of the most powerful and meaningful personal growth of my entire life during my first eight weeks at Notre Dame. I have encountered so much, as I reflect on the first thirteen weeks of my Notre Dame career, I feel that I can say with complete confidence that they have been some of the best, yet simultaneously some of the most difficult and stressful, thirteen weeks of my life. Thus, far I have encountered true brotherhood and sisterhood, as well as the truest me. It might seem odd to encounter myself, but I was able to fully encounter myself because of the truly amazing people that I have been surrounded with. While there are many ways that I will respond, I will certainly embrace everything that I encounter, both the joys and the challenges, and learn from every experience that I have. Before coming here, I thought that having a good experience was “black and white,” and that I either had fun or I didn’t. Through encountering true brotherhood and sisterhood, as well as my authentic self, I have realized that sometimes a suboptimal experience is exactly what I need. In my Integration One Assignment, I wrote that I was searching for meaningful relationships and happy memories. By responding to what I encounter with full immersion of myself, I believe that I can reach these goals and more! Residence halls are always used as examples of community, but I do not think I can do justice to the word, at least in the context of the Notre Dame community, without starting off by discussing them. When I arrived early for ROTC, most of the freshman were not here yet, so I was a little scared uncertain when I moved in. It wasn’t even an hour, though, before a sophomore stopped by to introduce himself and give me his phone number just so that I had it in case I needed anything. This has continued, as another sophomore helped me coordinate my train back here after Thanksgiving and even scheduled an Uber for us, relieving a lot of stress for me. It has not been uncommon for me to have conversations at 3 A.M. with friends in my section about random, but nonetheless meaningful, happenings in our lives. In addition, I feel that some of the best parts of my residence hall are the diversity that is natural and celebrated. My section alone is very diverse, and I have grown by learning from my friends in my section, and I think that this is because many of us have embraced the diversity of cultures and experiences. I genuinely want to hear the stories of others, and I have been able to encounter them by following the quote from Week 11 that resonates the most with me, which reads, “The story of race has many voices. Understanding it begins with listening” (“With Voices True Snapshot Summary” by Klau Center Archive on Race – Moreau FYE Week Eleven). In class this week, I remember that not only residence halls came up as examples of where we see community, but the entire university. I have encountered something bigger than myself that I genuinely feel a part of, and this is a brotherhood and sisterhood of great individuals, and I intend to respond by listening to the stories of others and continuing to fully immerse myself in all of Notre Dame, including the people and experiences. However, any healthy community encounters some dissonance, which we defined in class as disconnect of values or absence of perfect harmony between others. I have encountered dissonance with others and have learned that the authentic me does not like conflict, but also will not shy away from it. I have had evening hanging out with people who were simply disinterested in me, even though I was interested in them and their stories. I have also had many stressed nights over schoolwork or social events where I felt that I should be excited like everyone else but was just worried instead. However, Navy Ball and Calculus Test #3, both of which were stressors, ended up going well. They weren’t perfect, but I realized that both strengthened by bond with members of the Notre Dame community and taught me to be open and optimistic. Emery Bergmann in her video gave the advice to “Open you mind and take experiences as they come,” and I could not agree more (“Advice from a Formerly Lonely College Student” by Emery Bergmann – Moreau FYE Week 9). I will continue to respond to encounters with dissonance in community with an open mind that hopes for the best and looks at the lessons that can be learned. Navy Ball and Calculus Test #3 not only went well but allowed me to grow and taught me valuable lessons. Brothers and sisters really do look out for each other, and I have encountered and been a part of that at Notre Dame. I have also encountered the “truest me” here at Notre Dame because of the culture and people that I am surrounded by. To find this, though, I had to experience a certain amount of brokenness. In the first weeks of college, I learned that I could not have everything under control and instead decided I really liked living fast and “on the fly,” not really being too concerned. I still like to live fast, but not so fast that I feel tired, drained, or simply out of touch with what I am really looking for. Going to bed earlier and using a planner cleaned up some subtle feelings of brokenness, but I really have found that the truest me is the one who greets and is greeted by everyone the know, who is as involved as possible, as who strives to know everyone. I like the little pleasant pieces of the day, like catching up with someone I only see once a week or enjoying a sporadic meal at North Dining Hall, since I typically eat at South. However, this doesn’t always happen, and sometimes I find myself feeling “outside” or not perfectly thriving. However, just as Kirsten Helgeson says in her Kintsugi class, my struggles and experiences make me the “beautiful, dynamic, interesting person that [I] am today” (“Women Find Healing Through Kintsugi Workshop” by Kirsten Helgeson – Moreau FYE Week Ten). Realizing this self-confidence is what truly makes me happy, and both the support and occasional undermining of classmates are to credit. However, while I feel happy at Notre Dame now, I have encountered the reality that the authentic me worries about the future, both in the next couple of years at Notre Dame and in the longer future. However, I am comforted by our discussions in Week 12 about hope for the future and living with optimism. From our reading, the notion that “one does not have to be a Christian to believe that adversity does, or at least can, make people stronger and prepare them for harder challenges” is one that really resonated with me (“Hope – Holy Cross and Christian Education” by Fr. James B. King, C.S.C. – Moreau FYE Week 12). Any challenges that I face will make me stronger and likely provide me with fulfillment, and I will respond to them by being my true self. The challenges of Calculus this semester, as well as adjusting to a new (amazing) social environment, have done just that! People often told me that living away at college would be one of the best and more important experiences of my life, and I could not agree more. I have encountered so much in the past thirteen weeks that has sometimes made me happy, sometimes stressed me out, sometimes made me excited, and sometimes just made me laugh. The true community at Notre Dame, as well as my authentic self that I have discovered, have each allowed me to not only grow and change, but also anticipate the great things that are in store in the future.