Alejandro Castillo 10/15/2021 Moreau The roots of MY Beliefs I believe that I am searching for belonging at Notre Dame as I have just transitioned from high school in Texas to college in Indiana. This is not to say that I am not enjoying my time thus far at Notre Dame, but I want to have more close friends that I can turn to whenever and who will truly understand me. I suppose the best way to go about this is to be open when I talk to others and show my true self. This brings me back to week 1 when I watched Brené Brown give her Ted Talk on being vulnerable. What stood out to me the most in her talk was when she said “These folks, very simply, had the courage to be imperfect.” If we always put up a front of perfection, then we are only fooling ourselves and limiting ourselves. This goes back to how making meaningful friendships can really depend on how honest we are. I feel as if our imperfections are what make us who we are, what make our uniqueness, and what make our identity. Adding on to my previous beliefs, I also believe that I forge life-giving relationships by finding a balance and understanding that relationships are not going to be full of good times. I say balance because dependence is unhealthy. I have learned this from The Red Flag Campaign which gives us a chart of unhealthy vs healthy characteristics of relationships. Specifically, one part says “Dependence—One partner feels that he/she “can’t live without” the other.” We must be independent and open to sharing our gifts from God to everyone. Plus, no one should have to go through a situation where someone threatens to hurt themselves if they leave their partner. It is not easy to move on from any relationship, but we have to be honest with ourselves. Moving over to the fact that relationships are not going to be full of good times, I think it is important to have a faith based relationship to help get through those times. Sometimes we cannot solve a problem, but we can be guided through faith if we are faithful. I believe that I grow best by focusing on not only my external self, but more importantly my internal self. This reminds me of David Brooks’ Ted Talk about if we should live for our resume or our eulogy. The words that stood out to me were “We live in a culture with an Adam I mentality where we’re inarticulate about Adam II.” To give some context, Adam I is the external self that we are always worried about which leads us to want to conquer the world. This is a good thing to strive for greatness in life and use the gifts that God gave us, but this can end up in an unhealthy balance that ends up treating life like a game according to David. At this point we should stop and realize that all the material items that we gain in life will not really mean anything once we are gone. This is why we should focus more so on Adam II which is our internal self. Fortunately, this is exactly what Notre Dame focuses on which is growing the mind and soul. I believe that growing our soul through faith in God can lead us to true happiness instead of temporary happiness that material items bring us. I also believe that Notre Dame helps me to understand how to live a Catholic life. I learn more and more everyday when I simply see others doing acts of kindness constantly. It opens my eyes to realize that little things can help people in more ways than I thought. This brings me back to when Fr. Kevin Grove said “A catholic education means that every discipline that searches for truth, shares in that final and most beautiful truth that calls us to serve each other in love.” Serving in love is what this world needs, but we must start with ourselves. Simply asking someone how they are doing or going out of your way to help a random person that seems to be struggling are some ways that this can be done. We should treat others how we want to be treated. I believe that I am made to use my education to make the world a better place. Not everyone gets the opportunity to receive an education like Notre Dame’s. Thinking back on my Where I’m From poem, I explained that I am very blessed to have lived a comfortable life full of opportunities. I want to be in a position where I can have the knowledge to make a difference and provide opportunities for the less fortunate. This is what drives me to excel in school. Sometimes it can seem as if having to study so much is the worst thing in the world, but in reality there are people living from paycheck to paycheck trying to support their families. I believe that I am able to be the best version of myself by being able to overcome challenges in life. The main thing that I always think to myself is “it is not what happens to me, but how I respond to what happens to me.” The main way that I respond to anything that happens to me is to look at the positives. There are so many positives in my life that I tend to forget about which I need to turn to and appreciate. Another way that I now try to follow when I am in some sort of troubling time comes from a video with Father Pete. Father Pete represents our problems as knots. In order to get rid of a knot Father Pete says that we must be patient, understand that every knot is unique, and to remain hopeful. He also says we need help from others. This relates to me so much because when I have been struggling with a couple of my classes, I go to office hours until I understand the material. We cannot do everything on our own and we should try to use resources around us to save us from a lot of avoidable stress. I believe that through my education, I can truly find perspective which is essential for all of life. Everyone is full of implicit bias and we must work to try to find those biases and address them to the best of our ability. I say this because in the article How to Think about ‘Implicit Bias’, it says “It sets people up to overgeneralize, sometimes leading to discrimination even when people feel they are being fair.” It is easy to assume a stereotype because that is the only thing we have heard of something or someone. Through my education, I can learn why and how the world functions in all of my classes in different ways which only benefits me when I am out in the world trying to be a positive influence.