Integration One Tran 1 Nhat Nguyen Moreau First Year Experience 15 October 2021 How I Came To Be The independence of college life brings about many new experiences and changes that I have not yet encountered before in my life. It is also a time to reflect on my core values and what I truly believe in. My core values are what will carry and guide me throughout the next four years and the rest of my life, so it is important to ensure that I have a strong grasp of my core beliefs. Each week’s focus question for the Moreau First Year Experience course has allowed me to reflect upon myself, my beliefs, and my experiences. I believe that I am searching for a group of friends that I can truly rely on and be vulnerable with. In high school, I had many friends but none were close friends to whom I could truly express myself and my feelings. A lot of the friends that I had in high school partied, and I do not consider myself a party person, so I have always believed that I missed out on connections because I did not attend parties. I shifted my mindset to “I will act true to who I am, and if friends come along—good.” This mindset was meant to help me become less self-conscious because I am a very self-conscious and self-aware person. Dr. Brown’s statement saying, “The people who have a strong sense of love and belonging believe they are worthy of love and belonging” (“The Power of Vulnerability” by Brené Brown - Moreau FYE Week One) represents a notion that I have tried to come to fully believe myself in terms of finding friends. I think that I have achieved her statement to some extent. I was able to find three other girls whom I am very close to, and we are all able to share our experiences very openly. Earlier this week on my https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X4Qm9cGRub0&feature=youtu.be Tran 2 birthday, my three friends made a cake and surprised me with it. At that moment, I realized that I had found three caring friends who would go out of their way to help me if I ever needed it. Ever since I was little, my parents have taught me not to give in to peer pressure. I believe that this is an essential part of being able to ground yourself in your own values and beliefs. Not giving in to peer or societal pressure allows me to find my own values by myself. This forces me to evaluate what I truly believe in based on my own experiences. The idea of standing my ground has been built up and tested through in class discussions during some of my high school theology classes. Sometimes I was one of few who believed or interpreted something one way, and I felt comfortable enough to be in that minority. This belief has also helped me to stand on my own and has contributed to my being able to be comfortable with myself and be independent. I am comfortable enough with myself to be able to do things on my own without someone else with me, which I believe is something very valuable to know how to do in life. David Brooks said in his TedTalk, “We live in perpetual self confrontation between the external success and internal value” (“Should You Live for Your Resume or Your Eulogy?” by David Brooks - Moreau FYE Week Two). By being able to stand on my own, I can establish what I want from life. I can apply my own values to evaluate how I want to make my impact on society. I wish to be like “Adam 2” by fighting my weaknesses. Academic-wise, I recently received a bad grade on my economics exam. I am in the process of “fighting” this weakness and going to office hours, so I can grasp the concepts of economics and do better in the class. I believe that I view life through a lens of faith, hope, and love. I am a big believer in everything happening for a reason. A quote from Professor Fagerberg saying, “Everything speaks of God, nothing is ordinary” (“Faith Brings Light to a Dark World” by Professor David Fagerberg -- Moreau FYE Week Three) sums this idea up. Looking at life as being designed by https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MlLWTeApqIM https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau Tran 3 God helps me to recognize that there is a larger plan for me. I came to believe this through my mom’s cancer diagnosis. I viewed my mom’s cancer as God’s way of bringing my family closer to Him and to each other. Remembering that everything is of God’s creation helps me to find positives in negative situations. Challenges and obstacles in my life must be present because they are meant to teach me something that I would not have been able to learn by easily going through life. I believe that I am a good listener. In order for them to be fruitful, conversations must have meaning in them. To have meaning, conversations must also be a back and forth interaction in which one person is the listener and the other is the speaker. When I am in a conversation with someone, I try to actively listen so I can understand and comprehend what the person has just said. By actively listening, I can form a better connection with that person. If I were not actively listening, I may miss out on a piece of information that would have connected me and the other person more. A sentence that sticks out to me from one of the articles is “Great, fruitful conversation comes from two people engaging in one another’s thoughts, feelings, and experiences” (“5 Signs You’re in a Toxic Friendship” by Olivia T. Taylor - Moreau FYE Week Four). I believe that forming good relationships stems from good conversations and communication as this is what I engage in with my three closest friends. I often prefer to be the listener because I can learn so much about a person from just listening to them. I consider this to be something very beneficial for me in the future. I believe that failures and challenges are all meant to teach me something valuable. Failures and challenges cause me to think differently and more creatively. I believe this because if I improve my way of thinking now, I will not make the same mistake again, and I will benefit from it in the future. I view challenges as a means of pushing me forward and building my https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ Tran 4 determination and tenacity. Father Kevin Grove said in his presentation, “There is no failure that grace cannot transfigure into a blessing” (“Two Notre Dames: Your Holy Cross Education” by Father Kevin Grove - Moreau FYE Week Five). This belief came about from all my academic challenges. In each challenge, I had to come up with a different plan of action in order to do better. Throughout the years, I have corrected my way of viewing failures, and I now see them as a good thing when I can learn something from those failures. A profound quote from the “Where I’m From” website states, “ I want to know when you get to be from a place” (“Where I'm From” by George Ella Lyon - Moreau FYE Week Six). All people come from places and experiences that have had a deep impact on their lives. I believe that I am the result of my parents, faith, and interactions with other people. My parents have helped me form my core values and guided me in the right direction. These teachings have gotten me through high school and almost three months of college. I believe that my strong belief in my core values has helped me make the right decisions, so I will not regret anything in the future. My parents have always pushed me to do and be my best, and sometimes when I have little motivation, I remind myself of what I am trying to accomplish. I view my faith as being the biggest contributor to me grounding myself. It serves as a reminder of the more important things in life and gives me hope to keep pushing forward during hard times. I also believe interactions are a big factor in who I am today. I always try to find pieces of wisdom to take away from my interactions with people. Everyone has experienced and gone through life differently, so by interacting with many people, I am expanding my knowledge and horizons. I believe that the community and society at large need to lessen the implicit bias that all people have. Chimamanda Adichie said in her Ted Talk, “A single story creates stereotypes” (“The Danger of a Single Story” by Chimamanda Adichie - Moreau FYE Week 7). When we https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/Panopto/Pages/Viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story Tran 5 have implicit bias, we are only seeing one side of the story. As we have all seen with George Floyd and the BLM movement, there is still a lot of work to be done within our society about racial bias. As individuals, we must fight the misconceptions that we form in our minds. We have to question if what we hear is true and what sources the truth comes from. Living while only knowing one side of the story makes us ignorant people. In order for us to be agents of change, we must change our mindsets to always know two sides to a story. Each week of Moreau has allowed me to reflect upon my own decisions and priorities. My search for belonging and life-giving relationships has, so far, given me three very close friends whom I can trust and rely on when I need them. My identification of narratives, influences, and perspectives has led me to understand my background, how to make the best out of failures, and correct any misconceptions I may have. Searching for self-knowledge and a framework provoked me to evaluate what I want to accomplish in life and how faith plays a role throughout the way. Together, these weeks have made me reflect and remember who I am, what I believe in, and what I want to do to make me a stronger and more grounded college student. Tran 6 Works Cited Adichie, Chimamanda Ngozi. “The Danger of a Single Story.” TED, www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story. Brené, Brown. “The power of vulnerability.” YouTube, uploaded by Tedx Talks, 6 Oct. 2010, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X4Qm9cGRub0. Brooks, David. “Should you live for your résumé ... or your eulogy?” YouTube, uploaded by TED, 14 April 2014, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MlLWTeApqIM. Fagerberg, David. “Faith Brings Light to a Dark World.” Grotto Network, 29 Jan. 2020, grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=fa ll_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau. Accessed 13 October 2021. Grove, Kevin. “Two Notre Dames: Your Holy Cross Education.” University of Notre Dame - Sign In,notredame.hosted.panopto.com/Panopto/Pages/ Viewer.aspx?id=85 9bc1a8-0 d0f-4eb4-a 1c1-d0a45c429187. Lyon, George Ella. “Where I'm From .” Where I'm from, a Poem by George Ella Lyon, Writer and Teacher, www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html. Accessed 14 October 2021. Taylor, Olivia T. “5 Signs You're in a Toxic Friendship.” Grotto Network, 17 Sept. 2021, grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/. Accessed 13 October 2021. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X4Qm9cGRub0 http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html