Owen McGoldrick
Moreau Capstone

In my first semester and a half at school, I have learned a lot about myself, who I am, and what I value. For the first time in my life it has been just me, and while I have developed a great support group of friends and others, I entered this year surrounded by strangers, without my family a thousand miles away. I learned a lot about my weaknesses more than my strengths, many of my weaknesses I had believed were strengths but turned out to be reliant on those around me and skills I truly had to work on to feel as they once did. Work ethic and self motivation were examples of these and heavily impacted by my support system and comfortability with my situation at home. Spending this past year in a new environment has helped me to both notice and embrace these.
I strive to be the best version of myself for all those around me. Whether it's being a better brother to my younger siblings, setting a good example for them to follow, being a better son to my parents, giving back to them what they have given to me, a better friend to those around me, hoping I can provide a fraction of the support they give me, or better citizen, leaving the things and places around me better than I found them. Becoming complacent is extremely easy to do in a comfortable environment and switching up my life scenario has allowed me to see that. I hope to never become complacent, I firmly believe you can always improve and be better for yourself and the world. While you should always love yourself and have confidence in yourself, you can always improve and no one is ever truly perfect. It is hard to gauge success in today’s world as it can be measured in so many facets, but what I believe constitutes a life well lived is being a well rounded individual, giving back to not only those who have given to you, but those who cannot. I hope to not take a second of what I have and what I have been given for granted dand to live my life to the fullest every day, because we never know when the end is. I believe that no one is above anyone else and that with love and understanding, we cana all bring each other up as a species. (Developing a Mission Statement - Moreau FYE Week 13)
In my year in Moreau I learned more about myself than I expected. I began the year (for lack of better term) bullshitting my weekly assignments, quickly looking for a quote and puting 200 words behind it, hoping to get my 20/20 to get myself across the street to Notre Dame. However, as my first semester continued I realized that many of my classmates were more similar to me than I had previously realized, that I could gain something other than an A from my 2 hours of combined classwork and class time. As the weeks progressed I began taking in more and more from the conversations and lessons we had, all of which seemed to be relevant to me, something I had never truly felt in a classroom environment nor knew how to deal with. I still felt this feeling coming into the second semester but I felt I had grown as a Moreau student, student and person.
Weeks came and went but the lessons and ideas behind them didn’t. While I didn’t always express to the best of my ability I felt I was able to reflect on myself, my experiences, and my feelings better than I ever had before. Coming to school I had a grossly heavy reliance on my phone. I felt as if I could not interact with my friends without it, while this is technically true with my family at home and my friends at other schools, I felt as if I would have a different relationship with the classmates who lived just doors down from me if my head wasn’t in my phone all day. ("Why we need to slow down our lives" by Pico Iyer - Moreau FYE Week 1) However, in both appreciating the beauty of where I am and the people around me, my life has changed for the better. I have reduced my screen time by over 2 hours per day compared to the beginning of the year, and there is still room for improvement. Initially fearing a drag when I heard about the two hour documentary we had to watch for week two, I found Fr. Hesburgh’s drive to make the world a better place for everyone, as well as his national appeal while being a religious figure, is extremely interesting and inspiring. His love for the university and its people has allowed me to develop a deeper understanding of where my new home is and what it means to be here. Hesburgh by Christine O’Malley and Jerry Barca - Moreau FYE Week 2) As I continue through my next 3 years at Notre Dame I hope my love and appreciation for the university will continue to grow.
The readings and out of class assignments only have so much they can do, for me where my understanding of the lessons tends to heighten is in the in class conversations with classmates. Specifically in weeks 3 and 4 this was true. Week three’s passage was strange, written about a nun’s obsession with death. (Meet the Nun Who Wants You to Remember You Will Die by Ruth Graham - Moreau FYE Week 3)  I was taken aback by it and didn’t necessarily know how to feel about it. However, my classmates each seemed to have different and unique takes on the article, commenting how we should be thankful for each day, sharing this attitude for both ourselves and those around us. While i have been lucky enough to be relatively unaffected by death in my 18 years here (my grandfather being the only immediate family member or friend to pass) While you can never truly prepare for death or loss, seeing the reality of the world all around me and seeing my friends grieve has me as prepared as I believe I can be. But through all of this, the lesson of appreciation remains, for the people and places around us, and the so finite time we have with them. Week 4 shifted the focus towards our futures and careers and while I left it without knowing my dream job and 50 year life plan down to the week, I did find a lot of people just like me. My parents have always pressured me to find what I want to do in life and fast, while this isn’t necessarily a bad thing, my situation is far from unusual. Very few 18 year olds should know what they want to do, and I came to truly comprehend that. (Moreau Week 4 FYE)
In my week 5 conversation with my mother, I felt like I had grown from the person she knew me as at home. While she obviously knew my habits as well as anyone at home, I feel like in my first year in college I developed what I felt like was a new me. I struggled heavily in high school with procrastination and that hurt me a lot with assignments and even still this school year, having even more free time has just made that problem even more possible, but I have been trying hard to combat it, building schedules for myself and planning my work out before hand, something I hope to continue throughout college and even into my work life. (Conversation with my mom - Moreau FYE Week 5)
In week 6, reading Dr. Kim’s story about controlling the things you can, and the class lesson of mindfulness were both extremely interesting. I remember entering class a little angry and tired, I had forgotten about Moreau until 20 minutes before class, having to make a speed walk across Holy Cross and Notre Dame just to be 3 minutes late. A little flustered, after our teacher led a mindfulness session I came out of it fresh and surprisingly content. Anytime another teacher in a different class tried to do something along the same lines I never put myself into it, thinking it was a scam or not real and that theres no chance it would help so why even try. While I haven’t had the self drive to continue it myself, I have found myself in situations where stepping back, recentering my mind, and taking a deep breath has been invaluable. Difficult times will never stop and having tools to combat them is essential. (Ways to Practice Mindfulness McDonald Center for Wellbeing - Moreau FYE Week 6) 
Week 7’s TedTalk with Pope Francis was extremely interesting to me. He preached an idea of love for all and striving to improve everyone’s life. As the most important man in an extremely powerful organization, his declaration of love and equality amongst all can be seen as shocking, but it is his role as Pope to grow the faith and those inside it. He also touched on and idea that I believe is extremely important - equality. We are no better than the poorest of us, than the richest of us, than the most average of us. In this week I strengthened my previous beliefs and understandings, hearing from the Pope that he felt similar was only motivation for me to continue to carry my ideals. Why the only future worth building includes everyone by Pope Francis - Moreau FYE Week 7)
Relationships are arguably the most important aspect of life, whether its with family, lovers, coworkers, or passerbys, relationships dictate what we do, who we do it with, and why we do it. Steve Reifberg’s personal experience story in Chile opened my eyes to this. Most people in need, and those not in need, are not looking for a one sided help, they are looking for a relationship, accompaniment, giving back where they can. (A Learning Journey Together by Steve Reifberg - Moreau FYE Week 9) Allowing this to happen can be extremely rewarding for both parties and create unexpected bonds. Mutually beneficial are healthy, while cutting toxic people out can be difficult, especially if they have been around for a while, in order to grow as a person it is essential. I hope to have the courage to cut out those who drag me down, those who I can’t help grow and don’t help me grow, and those who don’t put in the same effort as me. Knowing self worth is important 
In the following week, I read Jacob Walsh’s “Growing Up Gay and Catholic,” I found his story of trials and self acceptance to be extremely interesting and empathizable even as someone who is straight. (Growing up Gay and Catholic by Jacob Walsh - Moreau FYE Week 10) I was able to relate story back to my uncles who were together and openly gay decades before I was born, raised in Christian families. On top of this, I was able to have an extremely interesting conversation in class about prejudice with Grace Kayastha who has had experiences I cannot even imagine. It helped me realize the privilege I hold as a white, straight, Chrisitian, male and that not everyone is able to live like I can. An understanding of others is essential to living in this world and in a new place with so many people from different backgrounds. I hope to continue that.
	In my opinion, one of the most important articles we read was How to Avoid an Echo Chamber (by Dr. Paul Blashko - Moreau FYE Week 11). In today’s climate we often listen to what we want to hear rather than what we should hear. If we fail to recognize the truth behind what is being told to us we can get trapped in dangerous cycles. This is why it is so important to be surrounded by people who challenge you, who believe different things than you, who come from different backgrounds than you. If we become complacent in our situations we can be trapped in these echo chambers and be blocked away from the rest of society and our loved ones. If we are always trying to develop and learn and meet new people this is nearly impossible and is  a tremendous aid to various helpful social skills.
I found it fitting that our final CRR was about the article “I am George Floyd.Except I can breathe, I can do something” by Marcus Cole. The same article which started our journey this year, on the application to Notre Dame helped close it. Getting to reflect on the same article more than a year apart I was able to notice the differences and similarities I saw and felt between the two times. Most were similarities, I felt sympathy for Dean Cole, for what he and black people across America are forced to go through, and a call to action, to change the world and country we live in. However, I read the article through a different lense. In my first try my reflection was all about what I could say or think that would get me into school, this time there was less stress, a greater sense of openness about it and I gained a greater appreciation and comprehension of the article.
In all, this year of school and Moreau have given me more than I could have asked for. While I developed outside of Moreau, the class helped me to realize all that has happened and what i still lack. I know that I will hold my values and lessons learned for the rest of my time at Notre Dame and continuation into the real world.