My connections with people and why they matter I believe that the most important thing I am searching for in life is relationships with others that grow by showing courage through being vulnerable. These are difficult emotions for me and humans to show, which is why they are praiseworthy. Doing something you are not comfortable with shows that you care, and that you are willing to make the effort to go outside of your comfort zone. This specifically applies to connections with other people, and as social worker Brene Brown puts it, “by the time you’re a social worker for 10 years, what you realize is that connection is why we’re here. It’s what gives purpose and meaning to our lives” ("The Power of Vulnerability" by Brene Brown – Moreau FYE Week One). Speaking on my own personal experience, I have always been a really introverted person. In high school, I always felt uncomfortable talking to people, which made it somewhat difficult for me to build connections. Now that I am here in college, I have worked on going outside of my comfort zone, which has helped me to better understand just how important it is to build and foster complex relationships with other people in my community. Following that idea of building positive relationships with others, it is important to realize when you are in a toxic or harmful relationship that does not better yourself, but instead makes yourself worse. Everyone at some point in their life has had some sort of relationship that was not a positive experience for them, for one reason or another. It is important to realize how “people in healthy relationships respect each other. They can talk honestly and freely to each other and share power and control over decisions. They trust and support each other and respect each other’s independence.” ("Healthy Vs. Unhealthy Relationships", The Red Flag Campaign – Moreau FYE Week Four). Positive, healthy relationships are a two way street, and both people must be in agreement about how to build and foster these positive relationships with each other. Without that mutual understanding, we find things we don’t want. I believe that to truly know oneself, one must first learn to know others. Based on my experience and the knowledge I have gained about connections with other people, I have realized just how important it is to know oneself as well. This was a process that has taken many years, and to this day is not complete, and I do not expect it to ever really be complete. However, learning about myself, and accepting what I truly feel is something important that has been learned over the things I have experienced through all my life. More on that later. When building yourself and discerning the way you want to live your life, the most important part is building not what you think other people want to see, it is being yourself, and that “you go into yourself, you find the sin… …you fight that sin… …then a depth of character is constructed.” (“Should You Live for Your Resume or Your Eulogy?” by David Brooks – Moreau FYE Week Two). Once you realize how you can connect with people in a positive way, you will be able to find a way in which you can grow your self to what you truly want to be. I believe that my own personal experiences from the past are the single most valuable things that not only shape who I am, but also are the most valuable things I can offer other people. Building on the importance of connections I can form with other people, what I have experienced in the past is so important to me. The hardships, pleasures, all of it has impacted me. And out of everything, one of the things I have discovered since coming to Notre Dame was how important https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X4Qm9cGRub0&list=PLmiPsabET-W_hjesjTZaITh2s1WbM-Kd0&index=3 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X4Qm9cGRub0&list=PLmiPsabET-W_hjesjTZaITh2s1WbM-Kd0&index=3 https://drive.google.com/a/nd.edu/file/d/0B93cIKOnINCLS1JpUzZ5Q1JseGs/view?usp=sharing https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MlLWTeApqIM https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MlLWTeApqIM time spent with other people really is. Carla Harris, in her speech to the graduating class last year, mentioned how important time was, and how valuable it is for us. Time is something we can never get back, unlike material goods and items. (“2021 Laetare Medalist Address” by Carla Harris – Moreau FYE Week Five). In high school, I cared so much about my schoolwork and my grades that I typically neglected spending time with other people and isolated myself a lot for those reasons. But since coming to college, I have worked to change this a lot. The experiences I have with other people build up my life in that way, which is really valuable. What really feels satisfying to me is not what I have on paper, but it is what I have in my heart, as those relationships are so valuable to me. Influences and perspectives are both things that I believe also shape me, but these are more fundamental to my core than the above examples. These are things that I truly believe, and have learned from a young age. The I am from poems ("Where I'm From" by George Ella Lyon – Moreau FYE Week Six) were important in recognizing those things which had an influence on me. By realizing where my core beliefs come from, I can start to understand what my core beliefs are and where they come from. This is where the ideas of stories comes into play. By discussing stories with other people, you can build connections with those people and form valuable relationships. The danger of this however, is the bias that can form from these things. There are a lot of situations in the world today where we see these problems, and it is important as an individual of a very complex and diverse society to keep these things in mind. In Adichie’s video about how it is irresponsible to not consider all sides of a story and what that means, we can see just how important it is to recognize these things. ("Danger of a Single Story" by Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie – Moreau FYE Week 7). This is important when conversing with other people, as communicating effectively and building those relationships that I find so important require understanding of the other person’s experiences, and this is the best way to start. At the end of all of this, and my very most core beliefs are that I believe in God. Faith is what wraps all of someone’s life together, and it is what sums up their beliefs and their experiences together. For me, faith has always been something that I have kept in the back of my mind when making decisions and deciding how to live my life. As someone who was raised Catholic, while I was never that involved in my faith, the catholic morals and teachings were things that were important to me and help me to this day to make decisions that can help me live my life. One of the important things that relates to my faith is how it helps keep me going when times are tough, like Fr. Pete discussed in his video about the role of faith. (“The Role of Faith in Our Story” by Fr. Pete McCormick – Moreau FYE Week 3). All in all, what matters to me is the bonds and connections I build with other people. This is done in multiple ways, but the bottom line is that it is formed by how I relate to them with my experiences and beliefs from the past. I believe that that is the most important thing a person can experience in their lives. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UjSwjn-SyB4 http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lcZMeqWWOIs&feature=youtu.be&ab_channel=UniversityofNotreDameCampusMinistry