Integration 2 11/30/21 Embracing the Unexpected Throughout the semester I have struggled, I have faced adversity, I have been in countless uncomfortable situations, but most importantly I have learned and I have grown. Moving across the country, over 750 miles away from my home, my friends, and my family, I was scared. My first few weeks I was struggling searching for a sense of belonging in this foreign place. Those weeks were riddled with homesickness, stress, and awkwardness, but after persisting through them I got to truly experience the amazing community of Notre Dame. Initially, not knowing anyone at this school or in my dorm made me feel out of place and alone. I tried my best to acclimate but I was constantly putting added pressure on myself to make friends. The one thing that really helped me was my dorm and the strong sense of community we have within Sorin College. Being in one of the smaller dorms on campus, I know everyone who is in Sorin. I am not close friends with everyone, and there are some guys who I don’t think I have ever spoken to, but that doesn’t change the fact that they are just as much a part of Sorin as the next. This is why the article Thirteen Ways of Looking at Community really stood out to me(“Thirteen Ways of Looking at Community” by Parker J. Palmer - Morreau FYE week eleven). In the article there was one specific definition of community that talked about how everyone around us is part of our community, even those we don’t interact with. Looking back on the start of the school year, the idea that I was part of a community, even if I didn’t speak to many people or know anyone was so helpful at making me feel like I belonged. Writing this now it’s hard for me to imagine a time where I felt like I didn’t fit in at Notre Dame or where I felt like I was alone. I have made lasting friendships with so many people during this semester. My dorm has also shown to be such a close knit community where we 11/30/21 really do everything together. My response to my feelings at the beginning of the semester was to try to socialize more and that's a decision I am so thankful I made. On top of a search for belonging, college is very different from high school, and I felt tossed into the fire. Classes were harder, and I felt every person around me was smarter. What I was experiencing was the textbook case of Imposter Syndrome as described by Elizabeth Cox in her TedTalk, “What is imposter Syndrome?” (“What Is Imposter Syndrome” by Elizabeth Cox - Morreau FYE week nine). Hearing others talk about how easy a class that I was struggling in was to them, or hearing them talk about exam grades just made me feel like I wasn’t cut out for Notre Dame. While this feeling diminished since the start of the semester I have also tried to use it as motivation to succeed. Now instead of feeling like I don’t belong I feel like I am working to show that I belong. This has really helped me progress from a stagnant mindset into a growth mindset. One of the other ways I really grew this semester was with my Catholic faith. Attending a Catholic university like Notre Dame has opened up so many opportunities for me to practice my faith every day. Being able to attend a school where I am not just receiving an education, but I am also able to enjoy a sense of community focused around my religion has been more meaningful to me than I ever could have imagined. A specific quote from the Holy Cross and Christian Education publication that stood out to me was “The charism of education in the faith that the Holy Spirit entrusted to the Congregation of Holy Cross through Blessed Basil Moreau combines a form of pedagogy that mirrors a person’s natural human development and moral formation with the call to Christian discipleship.” (The Holy Cross and Christian Education by Notre Dame’s Campus Ministry - Morreau FYE - week twelve) This quote shows how Notre Dame was started because of a calling to be an elite educational institution whose practices and 11/30/21 teachings revolve around the religious pillars it was founded on. After only one short semester, these pillars have had a large impact on my life, and have already left a lasting impact on who I am morally and spiritually. Something new that I started since I began attending Notre Dame was talking to a counselor at the UCS. For me, this was a new experience that I started to help with my anxiety and mental health. As a male I always believed that there was a negative stigma behind men with mental health disorders. It always made me feel like I could not reach out for help. This persisted until recently when I finally felt comfortable enough to seek a counselor. The idea of being broken isn’t one that I personally enjoy because it makes it sound like someone can’t be repaired or put back together. This is why I really enjoyed learning about the art of Kintsugi as discussed in the piece by the Grotto (“Women Find Healing Through Kintsugi Workshop” by the Grotto - Morreau FYE week ten). The idea of making a pot, smashing it, then using a golden design to put it back together and make a piece of art even more beautiful than before is very poetic to me. It resonates with my belief that nobody is broken, instead someone might just need their gold trim to make them even more beautiful than before. This is the mindset I had when I began attending my sessions at the UCS and because of it, I slowly think I can see my own gold trim. Starting college has been a very overwhelming experience at times. Being thrown into so many new situations was startling and very scary, but throughout my journey I have learned and grown. Looking back at where I was the day of our first Morreau class meeting, not knowing anyone and awkwardly wearing our dorm’s color coordinated shirts, I never would have expected to become so close with everyone in that room. This first semester has taught me many things like to take risks, travel outside of your comfort zone, and be more outgoing. Yet, the one 11/30/21 thing my first semester at Notre Dame has taught me is to embrace the unexpected with open arms. Sometimes the best things in life are the ones we never saw coming.