Integration Two - Prince 1 Professor Oswald Moreau First Year Experience 3 December 2021 Nurturing Community: Self-fulfillment, Diversity, Unity, and Hope A semester into my time here at Notre Dame, I have had the opportunity to ask myself many important questions as it relates to my academic and social journey. However, one question sticks out in particular: How can I maximize self-growth and find fulfillment when I am experiencing transition? Being a freshman at Notre Dame, it feels at times as if my entire life is in a state of transition. It is my first time living away from my parents and younger brother, my first time relying on myself to complete my homework, my first time finding what to eat for dinner, and my first time doing my laundry entirely on my own. Although change and becoming independent is a necessary, important part of growing up, it also makes it easy to feel discouraged. In light of all this change in my life, I have found myself succumbing to high expectations, often being upset when I fall short of them. When I encountered this question of how I can maximize self-growth and find fulfillment, I was inspired by Emery Bergmann. In Bergmann’s project, "Advice From a Formerly Lonely College Student", she writes, “It was beyond unrealistic for me to anticipate a seamless transition” (Moreau FYE Week 9). As a freshman at Cornell, Bergmann expected to have the “time of her life”: making lifelong friends, going to parties, and having a wonderful time. However, she often found herself feeling lonely, falling short of those initial expectations she set for herself. One of the reasons why I really like her project is that I can almost see myself in her shoes. The project, as well as Bergmann’s realization, highlight the important point that when we set unrealistic expectations, we fail to recognize that we are not all perfect human beings. As a result, we will eventually be unable to fill every expectation, causing us to feel like we are letting others down or not succeeding like our peers. Bergmann’s project has taught me that when I am facing a state of transition, I should accept that I am not perfect and the transition won’t always be “seamless.” For example, when I begin new classes next semester, I should not expect to be perfect in all of https://www.nytimes.com/2018/10/09/well/family/advice-from-a-formerly-lonely-college-student.html https://www.nytimes.com/2018/10/09/well/family/advice-from-a-formerly-lonely-college-student.html Prince 2 them. Instead, I should accept that I will make mistakes along the way because in the end, that is just part of the journey towards achieving my goals. Another takeaway from the project is that I should view social media as a tool for comparison. Not only does social media make it easy to compare our lives to others, but it helps fuel the negative aspects of loneliness. When we feel disconnected from others, we tend to feel worse about our situation when we are shown the “best” aspects of other peoples’ lives online. At Notre Dame, and almost every college, social media is essential because it allows us to meet new people, stay updated on friends’ lives, and so much more. However, I must also consider social media from a different perspective. It is hard to find fulfillment or achieve self-growth when you believe that everyone around you is succeeding when you are not. Social media exacerbates these feelings, which can lead to a dangerous cycle of self-deprecation. As I continue my journey here at Notre Dame, there are two ways I can live out a solution to the question I first posed. First, like Bergmann stressed, I must accept that transitions (big or small) won’t be seamless. In doing so, it will be easier for me to handle minor setbacks since I will realize them as part of the growth process. Second, I must acknowledge that although social media holds a lot of importance, it also can be dangerous. If I realize that everyone has their own unique path towards achieving their expectations, it will be easier for me not to succumb to self-comparison. In addition to finding fulfillment and self-growth, there is another important question I have been asking myself this semester: How can I foster a supportive community when it is composed of people with differing backgrounds? I cannot think of a better place to experience diversity than in college. Take my dorm for example, where my roommate lives 2,000 miles away from me, and my friend next door resides in Ireland. As a Notre Dame student, I have the opportunity to live, work, and laugh in the company of others that are so different from myself. Growing up, I was surrounded by a select group of people who although were different in background, shared many of the same experiences as me. Coming to college, I have been amazed at how different some people’s life stories have been from mine. Although diversity should be cherished, I have often found myself wondering how a community can make progress when its individuals have such different convictions. One example of this is my university seminar course which focuses on the 1619 Project by Notre Dame alumni Nikole Hannah-Jones. Sometimes when people talk about race, they feel Prince 3 uncomfortable and don’t want to “open up.” In the past, I have often found myself in this same situation because I feel as if I will say the wrong thing even when my intentions may be wholesome. My class is unique because it is one of the first spaces where I feel like I can openly talk about race with my peers. We engage in fascinating conversations about the project itself and racial movements in modern society. However, we have often been unable to determine the “so what” of the project and what the next steps should be towards achieving more social equality. One of the reasons why I think that we have been unable to come to an agreement is that we each hold our own convictions, but we are slightly unwilling to accept the convictions of others. When it comes to the question I posed to myself, I immediately reflect on Fr. John Jenkins. In his Wesley Theological Seminary Commencement Address (Moreau FYE Week 10), he states, “Can citizens of the United States learn to express their convictions in more skillful, more respectful ways?” The problem today is not that we don’t know what we believe in, but we fail to communicate and implement those convictions. In a diverse community like Notre Dame’s, it becomes even more important to find an answer to Fr. Jenkins’ question because the benefits are extraordinary. In his address, he argues that in order to implement our convictions, we must move beyond the evil of hatred in order to focus on the common good. What I take away from this address is that conviction can be corrupted when pride and greed fuel hatred and division. As a responsible community member, I must hold myself accountable to listen to other opinions with an open mind and heart. If we as a community fail to do so, pride and greed will pit us against one another and progress will be nearly impossible. Thinking back to my USEM class and Notre Dame in general, when my convictions are in opposition with others, the answer is enver to turn to hatred. Instead, I should develop a “both/and” mindset, seeking to incorporate seemingly opposing perspectives to find a collective solution rather than letting my convocation fuel pride and greed. In a community that is vastly expanding in diversity, opening our hearts and minds up to others will inspire unity and progress, not separation. As this semester has transpired, the way I think about how to deal with racism and diversity has become much more nuanced. In the past, I have been taught that the “solution” to racism thought was simply not being racist. Although primitive, this statement is correct, but it fails to recognize how much more complicated the idea of diversity and https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ Prince 4 race is in our society. Drawing back to my university seminar, my class has talked a lot this semester about antiracist thought. When thinking about how antiracism looks in our world today, there are two main goals. First, we must recognize the policymakers and policies that create racist institutions, and second, we must work to dismantle such systems. As a student at Notre Dame, I think it can be overwhelming to imagine what certain policies that promote antiracism and diversity would look like. Instead, I think it is vital to focus on the first goal of acknowledging racism in our community and then doing something about it. In his talk "Diversity Matters" (Moreau FYE Week 11), Professor Agustin Fuentes provides a plausible solution. Fuentes argues that “[Patterned differences between Races] are due to social, historical, political, economic, and experiential contexts and are changeable.” I really like Fuentes’ ideas because he highlights how our society is structured in a way where racism and implicit bias is everywhere. As an example, he talks about an implicit bias test at Harvard where ⅔ of participants had a strong automatic association of blacks with weapons and whites with harmless objects. This drives home the point that differential treatment is not only due to the color of one’s skin, but is a culmination of societal systems. However, there is hope in his talk as he states that these patterned differences are “changeable.” In order to create a stronger community, we must challenge our biases by exposing ourselves to different viewpoints and life experiences. However idealistic such a society would be, it is vital that we acknowledge that changing our biases is by no means an easy task since they are so ingrained in our minds and society. When I think about how this applies to my life here at Notre Dame, I can see how exposing myself to new ideas can come many ways: through discussion with my dorm friends, in class discussions with unfamiliar students, or even in the dining hall with someone I know little about. When I allow myself to open up and consume these differing perspectives, not only do I learn more about my own beliefs, but I inspire interconnectedness within my community. Furthermore, in doing so, I will be able to shift some of my own biases, promoting diverse, antiracist thought. To tie all of these important questions and ideas together, I have also been reflecting on what “greater purpose” I am working towards in my life. Although the question may seem overwhelming to some, I think it is essential to consider since it allows me to ground my actions and thoughts in this belief. As college students, when we are asked about our purpose in life, I think many people turn their attention towards their career path. However, https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/Panopto/Pages/Viewer.aspx?id=d14a0472-9c0e-44ea-bd39-53c67ee1d436 Prince 5 my experiences here at Notre Dame and especially in Moreau have taught me that we must turn our attention towards God when we think about our greater purpose. As a Mendoza student, I strongly believe there is a stigma associated with business students that our goals and aspirations are materialistic and not fulfilling. Stigmas like these are damaging because not only are they untrue, but they divert us further away from being able to recognize what our purpose truly is. I was not able to come up with an answer to my question until the twelfth week of Moreau when we discussed hope. Before taking Moreau, I saw hope as a goal to be reached and the aspiration to achieve this goal. Then I read Fr. James B. King’s “Holy Cross and Christian Education” (Moreau FYE Week 12). Fr. King writes, “Striving for completeness means spending one’s life as a citizen of this world imitating the person of Christ as the gateway to citizenship in heaven.” This passage made me realize that our collective “hope” is to gain “citizenship into heaven.” With that end goal of heaven in mind, hope also influences our actions as humans. Hope is not just an aspiration at this point, but it is a way of life. As Christians, we must push one another to live our lives according to God’s will, going beyond our comfort zones, questioning new beliefs, and preparing “the world for better times than ours.” What Fr. King’s message means to me is that even when things may be hard, we still have a devotion to God and that strength in this hope exacerbates our ability to live out the Gospel in our lives. When I think about how this relates to my life going forward both at Notre Dame and beyond, I think about how I can live in accordance with this end goal of heaven in mind. This can transpire by simply loving others, encouraging diversity both in thought and practice, applying my education to modern day societal problems, or even inspiring hope in those who are hopeless. There is no set of “instructions” that will show me how I should live my life. In the end, I am accountable for my actions. If I realize I am not perfect, cherish diversity, and expose myself to different life experiences, I am certain that not only will I find who I am, but my community will be stronger as a result. https://campusministry.nd.edu/assets/105621/