Moreau Integration Two Kevin McCarthy


Kevin McCarthy

Moreau Integration Two

Thigpen

28 November 2021

Experiences at the University of Notre Dame

The past few months have flown by. I have met new people, done new things, and I really

feel as if I have had the opportunity to come into my own. Being in a new environment for such

an extended period of time has allowed me to focus on myself as well as learn how to live with

and be around people who aren’t my immediate family. The opportunity to encounter new things

and become the man I know I can become is something that I wouldn’t trade for the world, and I

cannot wait to continue this journey.

In being at the University of Notre Dame, there are certain pressures that can be felt by

all students. Notre Dame is such an academically demanding school, and it is a fact that there are

certain standards that need to be met and surpassed here. Back home in Little Silver, I was a

straight A student. In middle school, I was the top of my class. In highschool, I was the top of my

class. Failing a test or getting a bad grade was not something that happened to me frequently.

Along with this, I had developed a reputation amongst my friends and even their parents as the

“smart kid”. Obviously this is not something to be ashamed of, and I was proud to be known as a

smart kid. However, the expectations to always succeed sometimes weighed on my mind. Before

Notre Dame, I was quite hard on myself and demanded a certain level of success. However, I

have since learned that “not only are these expectations [of great success] arbitrary, but they will

almost always backfire on [me],” I cannot live my life according to the expectations of others

(“Why Letting Go of Expectations is a Freeing Habit” - Moreau FYE Week 9). This lesson is

https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau


something that I have learned very quickly here at Notre Dame. I cannot live for anyone aside

from myself. The only opinion that truly matters is my own. That is not to say I can just give up

and fail all of my courses however. It is still important to give my best effort at all times, and

even though I’ll come up short more often than not, I need to learn from my mistakes and

continue on.

On a day to day basis, I encounter all types of things. I encounter something as simple as

different types of weather or I can encounter complex situations. In being at the University of

Notre Dame, I have truly encountered what one would call a community. There is a sense of

brotherhood in my dorm, even though none of us are blood related. Everyone I have encountered

thus far is always willing to help regardless of who you are, what you believe, or what you may

look like. However, this is sadly not the case in many parts of America, and even the world. It

can be quite obvious that “the danger is all around us now” as “hatred is rising, [but] all sides

feel more virtuous,” however many still do not notice this major threat (Wesley Theological

Seminary Commencement - Moreau FYE Week 10). Being in such a sheltered environment at

Notre Dame, this sad reality is often easy to forget. When I return home and travel outside of

campus, hatred is clearly prevalent on a day to day basis. Over the course of Thanksgiving break,

I was hanging out with old friends, and a political discussion arose. I tried to not get involved,

but two of my oldest friends got into a full fledged argument because their opinions were on

opposite sides of the spectrum. These were two people who had been friends for life, yet they

seemed as if they hated each other. This felt totally wrong, yet neither of them were willing to

concede nor agree to disagree. In being at Notre Dame, I have seen the importance of listening to

peers, even if you have a different perspective than them. If there is a lack of willingness to work

together as a whole, nothing good can ever be accomplished. A true community is one that

https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/
https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/


agrees to disagree, but can still come together for the greater good of our society. We have to

collectively learn to be less arrogant and dismiss our selfish personal needs for the betterment of

society.

Even though it is important to have a sense of community, it is a necessity that it is not

forced upon anyone. The notion of community was once pretty black and white for me. I had

previously believed that people lived harmoniously together, or they did not. Community to me

was a group of people who actively collaborated and collectively tried to better the world around

them. I was naive in my thinking that a community could be forced onto certain individuals and

everyone can come together. However, “when we try to ‘make community happen,’ driven by

desire, design, and determination—places within us where the ego often lurks… we will exhaust

ourselves and alienate each other, snapping the connections we yearn for” (Thirteen Ways of

Looking at Community - Moreau FYE Week 11). Before coming to Notre Dame, I personally

had never considered the fact that trying so hard to create a community may in turn have an

adverse effect and create disdain. I personally felt as if a community can be formulated by

individuals who are willing to try hard enough to do so, but apparently it can be considered

something that we can “relax” into. The more I think about it, the more it makes sense.

Whenever my parents assign me chores, something arises in me and I do not want to do them at

all. However, if I see the dishes piling up in the sink, I will feel the urge to clean them even

though no one instructed me to. I’m not sure exactly why I am like this, but this is probably true

for many people. It is an important individual choice to become part of a community and do

good for the betterment of others.

Everyday I wake up knowing that if I make any mistakes, I will always have tomorrow to

right my wrongs. This is a small part of hope. In my eyes, hope is an optimistic feeling for the

http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/
http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/


future, and hope can be characterized as something you give yourself when you feel upset. Hope

was once something that was quite ambiguous to me, but my time at Notre Dame has helped me

develop a more clear understanding of what it truly is. I can never truly define hope, as everyone

has their own interpretations of what the word means. Something that has become quite clear to

me is that “the contemplation of new ideas and needs beyond our comfort zones requires a

sacrificial willingness to put at risk everything that we think we already know” and we need to

have “hope in that process to stick with it” as it “will lead us to a new and better understanding

of our vocation as citizens in this world” (“Holy Cross and Christian Education” - Moreau FYE

Week 12). This is a crucial factor of learning that tends to be overlooked, and often this is not

associated with hope either. In order for someone to learn something new, they often have to

make a mistake or do something wrong in the first place. The first chemistry quiz I took at Notre

Dame was absolutely atrocious. I bombed it and barely passed getting a 65%. Even though I was

initially dismayed, this was a valuable learning experience. Notre Dame is not highschool, and I

could not cram in a few week’s worth of lectures into one night. Now, I study for days leading up

to the exam or quiz and each week I progressively score better. This can be analogous to other

real world situations. I have to be open minded, I have to challenge myself and my preconceived

beliefs in order for me to become an even better person. Hope and growth are codependent, and

there is no room for learning if I do not allow myself to fail.

The experiences I have had at the University of Notre Dame have been outstanding.

These experiences are unmatched by the experiences my friends tell me about, and I wouldn’t

trade them for anything. I have learned so much about myself in this first semester, and I look

forward to growing into my fullest potential here.

https://campusministry.nd.edu/assets/105621/