Moreau Integration 2 Moreau FYE Oh The Semester Has Flown One of the most important questions I’ve asked myself this semester is what my goals were and if they were realistic. I have always struggled with expecting too much of myself or trying to make myself fit into the expectations of others. When I came into college I had this idea of the perfect student, who does all of these activities and clubs, gets perfect grades, and plays on a varsity athletic team all while maintaining an active social life. I had this expectation that I would be able to do all of these things, but when I actually got to college I realized that not only were the classes difficult, so was the time commitment for clubs and I never got the opportunity to walk on to the varsity golf team. I had to take a few weeks to realize that maybe these all weren’t exactly things that I wanted, but more were things that I thought others expected of me. “You can’t live your life according to the expectations of others. When you do, you aren’t living your own life — you’re living someone else’s life.” (“Why Letting Go of Expectations is a Freeing Habit” by Julia Hogan - Moreau FYE Week Nine). This quote from this article really spoke to me, especially in this context. I realized that it was okay to be imperfect and that as long as I put in a lot of effort to do things that I really cared about it didn’t matter what other people thought. Personally, I thought that the best part about being in college is that my parents weren’t there to constantly see what I was doing, meaning that the onus was on me to put effort into the things that I really wanted to do. I think that this added freedom aspect helped me to realize that some of the things that I did in high school were a product of trying not to disappoint them rather than doing something that I actually enjoyed. My biggest takeaway from all this was that firstly I need to take responsibility for my expectations and make sure they are realistic. Secondly, I learned that outside expectations are just noise that you have to tune out because if you focus too much on them you can lose your true goals. As an international student, I feel that I place much greater importance on my roots and my homeland. My first experience at Notre Dame was meeting the international students during international orientation, but when I actually integrated into the student body I could feel the lack of diversity a little more. I felt this a little amplified because I am not a catholic, I felt a little left out when all of my friends went for mass on Sundays and I didn’t attend due to my personal beliefs. I found comfort however in the welcoming and accepting nature of everyone at this school. This is best characterized by this quotation: “Namely, a genuine recognition of our common humanity as created in the likeness and image of God.” (“Should Catholic Schools Teach Critical Race Theory?” by Christopher J. Devron, S.J. - Moreau FYE Week Ten). I thought this quote was a brilliant description of the way I felt accepted at Notre Dame. The ideas of https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://www.americamagazine.org/faith/2021/06/03/critical-race-theory-catholic-high-schools-black-lives-matter-240792 https://www.americamagazine.org/faith/2021/06/03/critical-race-theory-catholic-high-schools-black-lives-matter-240792 Moreau FYE family and community fostered by Notre Dame are prominent if you experience life as a student at Notre Dame. At Notre Dame people are more respectful of their differences and have the curiosity to learn about other cultures and traditions. Despite being an agnostic I can be included in all events at the University, this makes me appreciative of the values that Notre Dame as an institution is built on, values of accepting people from different backgrounds and faiths. Yes, I sometimes feel like I am a foreigner in a faraway land, but I choose to look at that as a positive. It brings me closer to my roots and makes me proud to be from Singapore. I always believed that my passion within engineering was computers, but once I joined the Notre Dame Formula SAE racing team this belief was questioned. I went in with a love for computer programming and hardware, but the more I explored this club and got really into the literature provided I began to question this. I was placed on the engine team and talking about cars, engine output, and turbocharging had me really excited. However, I still had a love for computers and I wasn’t sure whether I was either in the wrong major or the wrong subsystem team within my club. There was a point at which I was feeling really hopeless and I had no idea what kind of classes I wanted to take during the second semester, or if I should swap the team I was in within the club. It was then that I realized something best said by this quotation “The contemplation of new ideas and needs beyond our comfort zones requires a sacrificial willingness to put at risk everything that we think we already know.” (“Holy Cross and Christian Education” by Rev. James B. King, C.S.C. - Moreau FYE Week Twelve). I need to put myself outside my comfort zone and feel hopeless to come to a realization about what I truly want. My passion for engineering isn’t black or white, computer or mechanical. My interests are more nuanced and it is a hybrid. I like to work with computers and code but I also enjoy the challenge of getting my hands dirty and trying to construct an engine for a racecar. I realized it is possible to have more than one passion in a field, and instead chose to leverage my club members to learn something that I might not have been able to from my major. Most of my friends are not hugely similar to me in terms of age or background. Most of them are from the US and are between 18 and 19 years old. I am a 21-year-old ex-military kid from Singapore. This leads to some dissimilar experiences and causes a little bit of difference of opinion in the way I think and act in comparison to them. The particular instance that first comes to mind when I think about this is the views on war and conscription that they had. I was all for it, having done the training and felt the patriotism of donning the uniform. Some of my friends, however, were talking about diplomacy as a better solution for international conflict and it led to a bit of a heated discussion. It was only when I actually argued against one of their points in a Moreau FYE philosophy paper only to get a grade less than expected that I realized the benefit of having dissimilarities and how it can strengthen our bonds with people. “But when I fall, I see a secret hidden in plain sight: I need other people for comfort, encouragement, and support, and for criticism, challenge, and collaboration. (“Thirteen Ways of Looking at Community” by Parker J. Palmer - Moreau FYE Week Eleven). It is clear to me now that having people around with whom you have a strong personal bond despite dissimilarities is the most important thing when trying to develop as a person. If you fail and there is nobody to help pick you up it takes even more effort to be able to have the willpower to force yourself to pick yourself up. It is much better to work with someone to solve a difficult problem than to try and go at it alone. The most important thing is that without others, it is unlikely we will have the correct environment to succeed, and being able to leverage an environment of dissimilarity and come out together better is extremely important. http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/