Integration 2 Assignment Moreau FYE 12/1/2021 Overcoming Challenges for a Meaningful Life The transition from being in high school and living at home with my family to living 8 hours away in college has certainly had its challenges. Back home, I had this expectation of myself that if I didn’t have perfect grades or end up top of my class I would fail. School had always been relatively easy for me, and I had set the expectation that college would be the same way. Everything in school had been going smoothly until one week, just before Thanksgiving break, when all of my friends and I collectively had the most stressful academic week of our lives. I had never experienced a feeling like this before. I thought there was absolutely no way that I could get everything done on time, and I felt completely overwhelmed and burnt out. At the end of this week, we all went to mass on Sunday, and when we walked back outside we had an impromptu snowball fight and couldn’t stop laughing. In this moment, all of us forgot about our stress and had fun without a care in the world, and I was reminded that moments like these are what I will remember most about college, not the score I got on a test or worrying about my grades. This experience reminded me of the article “Why Letting Go of Expectations is a Freeing Habit,” from week 9 of the Moreau FYE course, because it reminded me of the importance of letting go of any previous expectations that I set for myself to have perfect grades. One particular quote from this article that stuck out to me states, “ The common thread in all of these examples is that these individuals believe they must be perfect and that they must live up to the expectations of others (and themselves)” (“ Why Letting Go of Expectations is a Freeing Habit ” by Julia Hogan - Moreau FYE Week 9). Before coming to college, I had associated my grades and academic success with my self worth. While it is still important to work hard and focus on my education, experiences like having a snowball fight with your friends after a stressful week are the times that I have felt pure joy and happiness, not when I got a good score on a test or assignment. For the past 5 years, I have struggled with body image and self confidence. This has led me to have a very poor relationship with food and exercise habits. By the end of my time in high school, I was working on healing my relationship with food and building self confidence, but then came the fear of the “freshman 15.” Many people joke about this, but it can be incredibly damaging to people who struggle with body image. This semester has been a challenge for me trying not to fall back into old habits, especially in an unfamiliar place away from home. The video about kintsugi pottery in week 10 of the Moreau FYE course was very powerful for me because it helped me to realize that I am not broken or wrong for going through what I have gone through, and that I don’t have to be perfect to be doing better. The quote, “That they learn that https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau the things that they’ve experienced — the good, the bad, the ugly, all of that — it has made them this beautiful, dynamic, interesting person that they are today. And that that person is worth celebrating and honoring,” helped me to realize that I don’t need to change anything about myself to feel happy, and that I deserve to celebrate myself for who I am (“ Women Find Healing Through Kintsugi Workshop ” by Grotto - Moreau FYE Week 10). Going forward, I hope that I have the strength to fully heal. I have found that celebrating the small victories provides a huge confidence boost, even for something as small as deleting food tracking apps, which has already helped me feel a sense of freedom and power. When I first came to college, I had the unrealistic expectation that I would find my best friends on the first day of Welcome Weekend, and be best friends with all of my roommates. When I didn’t seem to find my group right away, I became discouraged and thought that I would never find my close-knit group of friends that I would have for the rest of my life. As the weekend progressed, I began forcing myself to try to fit in with a group and felt even more disconnected the more I did this. The text, “Thirteen Ways of Looking at Community,” made me reflect on the first week of being here at Notre Dame. The quote from this text, “Of course, in our culture—a culture premised on the notion that we must manufacture whatever we want or need—learning to relax and receive a gift requires hard work...Community begins not externally but in the recesses of the human heart,” felt very relevant to my first week here because it reminded me how I started to feel a stronger sense of belonging when I took a step back from forcing myself to belong to a group right away (“ Thirteen Ways of Looking at Community ” by Parker J. Palmer - Moreau FYE Week 11). Almost as soon as I stopped forcing myself to belong in a group, I met the people that are now some of my closest friends. I learned that allowing things to happen naturally instead of forcing them to happen is what makes the strongest connections with others, and I hope to continue to use this idea to foster stronger relationships throughout the future. My time thus far at Notre Dame has allowed me to grow in my faith. I did not realize how valuable the required theology courses would be to me and my faith until one day early on in the semester that I can still vividly remember. We had been discussing the persecution of many religious populations BCE, and at the end of the class my professor simply stated that these people were suffering for the greater good because “God is responsible for everything.” As simple as this statement was, I remember getting chills down my spine and instantly feeling a deeper connection with my faith. I realized that everything that I am going through is not a punishment, but a plan that is meant to happen for my life. That class helped me to see that God is everywhere, and that I can strengthen my faith through small acts every day. This experience reminded me of a quote from week 12 of Moreau FYE describing the role of faith in the world. The quote states, “The way of the cross is everywhere, and we walk along it every day in spite of ourselves and often unknown to us” (“ Hope - Holy Cross and Christian Education ” by Fr. James B. King, C.S.C. - Moreau FYE Week 12). One of the most peaceful and satisfying activities that I enjoy is walking around the lakes then stopping at the Grotto. I have been able to use the knowledge that I have gained from my courses and experiences at Notre Dame to deepen my https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreaug%20Through%20Kintsugi%20Workshop https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreaug%20Through%20Kintsugi%20Workshop http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ https://campusministry.nd.edu/assets/105621/ faith through nature and everything that is around me, and I hope to continue this journey throughout the next three and a half years and for the rest of my life.