Microsoft Word - JPavlockIntegrationIII 1 Pavlock Professor Helm Moreau FYE Integration III March 3, 2022 Go Rest High on That Mountain Hello everyone, welcome to the service. I know you all may be sad, but it will only be sad for a bit longer. As Jordan requested, we will be having the afterparty up at the school. But for now, I want to say a few things about my dear friend. Today we stand adjacent to the Poor Farm Cemetery, an unmarked burial ground for the poor and downtrodden of Smethport way back in the early 1900s. To our right are the resting places of the deaf, blind, and insane. Surrounding their graves are tens of Norway Spruce trees, one of Jordan’s favorite trees. Each day as he went to school, he would look out from the highway at this hill, and he would see the spruce trees in a big square on the hillside. For a long time, he didn’t know that there were people buried there, but he had always enjoyed the beauty of those trees. As he got older, he would take his bike into town on the railroad grade down in the valley there. Each time he would look up and see these trees, he would think about how, though he never knew these folks, he could appreciate the beauty they left behind. Today we stand where in fifty years or so, there will be a thriving forest. The five- hundred little Eastern Hemlock trees you see here will be the play area of his great- grandchildren. They will stand tall and for a long time. There will be no marker of his grave, only these beautiful trees. When I asked him why he didn’t want a marker, he told me, “That’s not the point.” He said he didn’t want to plant the trees as a living memory. He wanted to plant the trees so that people could live and make memories within them. He told me about how much he loved the 2 Pavlock spruce trees over there, even when he didn’t know that they surrounded a burial site. He said that “Maybe people will know that I’m buried up in the Hemlocks, or they won’t. Regardless, they will look over and see the beautiful trees. They can hike through. Build a fort. Hunt. That’s a lot more meaningful than a stone in the ground.” Jordan and I were talking one night in college, and we were discussing what it meant to live a good life. We talked about achievements, money, women. Antique bottle collection size. The whole nine yards. But something he said struck me. He said that the single most crucial factor in a life well-lived is how you impact other people’s lives, regardless of what that gives you in wealth, fame, or notoriety. As Sister Theresa Alethia Noble once said, “Everyone dies, their bodies rot, and every face becomes a skull. (“Meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” by Ruth Graham – Moreau FYE Week 3) However, Jordan told me the secret to immortality. He said, “Every time you interact with someone, you leave a little bit of yourself with them. Even if they don’t remember you, by interacting with them, you have changed their life. I try to be a positive force in the lives of everyone I meet because that way, I am leaving others with a positive bit of myself. If I can make the lives of others better, and they do so for more people, and so on, I never really die, even if no one knows my name.” Just like these trees will, Jordan aimed to leave an impact during his life rather than leaving his name. Jordan recognized that it was his relationships with others that were most important. He found fulfillment by giving to others, not only because it was right, but because they, in turn, gave happiness to his life. As Eppie Lederer once said in the movie Hesburgh (which, by the way, is a classic), “Pray for me, Father, and I’ll pray for you. This way we’ll both be covered, no 3 Pavlock matter what.” (“Hesburgh” – Eppie Lederer – Moreau FYE Week 2). Jordan supported his friends, and they supported him. One time, I was at the gas station with Jordan when a homeless man walked up to us and wanted money. We had already seen him walk up to several folks who quickly shuffled away from him into the store. When he came to us, Jordan gave him five dollars and struck up a conversation with him for ten minutes. Jordan was always doing that, talking to the folks who no one else would. When he was a senior in high school, he had this eighth-grader friend who was bullied a lot by the other kids. Jordan sat with him at every football game, walked with him after school, and even kept in touch with him after high school. He knew that it looked weird for him to be hanging with a random eighth-grader, but he didn’t care. Jordan realized that, as Pope Francis put it, “The future is, most of all, in the hands of those people who recognize the other as a “you” and themselves as part of an ‘us.’ We all need each other” (“Why the only future worth building includes everyone” by His Holiness Pope Francis – Moreau FYE Week 7). Jordan was always living in the moment. One of his favorite quotes was, “I encourage others to focus on what we can do for others or what we can do already instead of what we cannot do or what we do not have yet.” (“5 Minutes: A Grotto Short Film” by Aria Swarr, Quote by Jihoon Kim – Moreau FYE Week 6). Jordan always spent his time doing what he could and didn’t waste his life worrying about what he didn’t have. He always had the ability to do something, so something he did. 4 Pavlock Though he worked very hard in life (just look at his 9500-piece antique bottle collection), Jordan always made time for his family. He made sure to take the kids to sports practice, remember his anniversary, and even walk the dog each evening. He liked this one story about Gandhi. It went, “One day Mahatma Gandhi was said to have woken up and told those around him, ‘This is going to be a very busy day. I won’t be able to meditate for an hour.’ His friends were taken aback at this rare break from his discipline. ‘I’ll have to meditate for two,’ he spelled out” (“Why we need to slow down our lives” by Pico Iyer – Moreau FYE Week 1). Though Jordan wasn’t much of a meditation guy, he worked hard and played even harder. Before he knew what he wanted to do in life, Jordan had a conversation with his mom as part of a first-year experience course at Notre Dame. At that time, Jordan struggled to grasp precisely which subject he wanted to delve into, and he told his mom that this really bothered him. She said to him that “You’re going down the right path. You just don’t know what path” (Discernment Conversation with My Mom – Moreau FYE Week 5). As he continued life, that reassurance from his mom stuck with him. Even when times were uncertain, he knew that in the grand scheme of things, he was on the right path that God had intended for him. Jordan used another bit of career advice, one he got from Notre Dame, but in a different way. Whenever he was frustrated with something complex, like fixing his car or doing his taxes, he would say, “It’s not a one-step process.” (“Navigating Your Career Journey – Moreau First Year Experience Course” by Meruelo Family Center for Career Development – Moreau FYE Week 4) Though this was initially meant to describe the career discernment process, he used it for everything. Every time he got stuck, he recognized that there were simply more steps to be taken. 5 Pavlock So here we are, on this beautiful summer day, saying goodbye to our friend, father, husband, and grandfather. As per his request, everyone should take one of the white roses over by the first row of trees and place it in the grass wherever they see fit. Now, finally, as he first heard sixty years ago on this very hillside during a dedication ceremony for the buried Poor Farm residents, a few of his family members will perform “Go Rest High on That Mountain” by Vince Gill. Oh, and don’t forget, the afterparty starts at six! Bring your dancing shoes!