Integration Two Moreau Moreau First Year Experience 30 November 2021 Utilizing the Notre Dame Experience This semester has been filled with many trials and tribulations for me. Navigating both school and relationships within a college environment is an experience that has resulted in a new understanding of myself. Some questions I’ve been forced to ask include: Why am I stressing about imaginary expectations? How can I best utilize all of the opportunities handed to me by simply being at Notre Dame? Where do I find my most wholesome relationships? All important questions in their own way, and I’ve been dealt with attempting to find the answers. I find it necessary to separate myself from my grades. When the general population was asked about “None of them tell me that they believe they are living a fulfilling life when they let their self-worth be defined by these external expectations.” ("Why Letting Go of Expectations is a Freeing Habit" by Julia Hogan - Moreau FYE Week 9). It's completely unfair for us to determine our own self-worth based on unrealistic things. I personally used to always become incredibly upset and anxious if I ever received a grade less than an A, because I thought that I was disappointing my mom. However, she never expressed the slightest disappointment in my grades, she just wanted me to be happy! I’ve realized over time that I’m the happiest when I’m doing things I enjoy without the expectation of being the best of the best. All that matters is if I had a good time and felt like I was being my most authentic self. It’s hard to separate myself from my grades on this campus because I’m always surrounded by others who value them incredibly higher than I do, because I feel like I’m doing something wrong. When I begin to base my self-worth off of my academic accomplishments, I start to become more introspective. Sometimes I need to find ways to channel my more negative emotions. In one of our readings, I learned about Kirsten Helgeson, who uses Kintsugi, a Japanese art, to channel her inner turmoil stemming from the negative encounters she’s had from being a woman. She says “I want people to also know that their hearts are breakable, and it’s a very good thing, that it’s worth celebrating because it allows you to grow and expand. And you get to put your heart back together.” (“Women Find Healing Through Kintsugi Workshop” by Kirsten Helgeson - Moreau FYE Week 10). People are going to channel their emotions differently. I personally enjoy talking about my problems with people I know and trust, but I understand that some people are unable to do the same due to the severity of their situations. I think it’s wonderful that others can find ways to confront issues, such as the Kintsugi as demonstrated by Kirsten Helgeson, and through having larger discussions as a community on how to collectively deal with bigger problems. Having an open space for people to collaborate according to their own comfort is incredibly important, and I’m still https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/ searching for a way to do this through the Notre Dame campus. I have utilized the McWell Rooms, which gave me a space to relax and breathe. I’ve met many different types of people from all different backgrounds. Through this diverse campus, I’ve been able to listen to other people retell their experiences, and I’ve learned a lot about the struggles they’ve faced compared to my own. Professor Agustin Fuentes details this, saying “If we are willing to embrace the spiritual potentials of suffering, then both community and leadership, human resourcefulness and the capacity to hold it in trust, will prove to be abundant among us—gifts we have been given from the beginning but are still learning how to receive.” (“Diversity Matters” by Agustin Fuentes - Moreau FYE Week 11). We can all learn from each other when it comes to discussing our personal struggles. Diversity in conversations is incredibly important because it allows us to hear about different experiences and reasonings as to why someone may have a different perspective on life. I am not a member of the community that has faced many problems due to the demographic I belong to. My privilege has left me blind to many issues that a lot of my friends face due to them being different racially or ethnically, because I grew up in a bubble filled with people that looked just like me. I now find myself surrounded by a variety of people, and I’m always thinking of ways I can be a better ally for them to have a comfortable experience here on campus. One of the best parts of my first semester experience has been meeting all of my professors. This campus was founded on the principles of maintaining healthy relationships between staff and students. Father Moreau “recognized the need to maintain a deliberate balance between firmness and leniency in dealing with students. He intuitively understood the difference between being a teacher-mentor and a hovering ninny; good teachers avoid fighting small battles and liberate their students to soar rather than quashing their spirits.” (“Holy Cross and Christian Education” by Rev. James King - Moreau FYE Week 12). Moreau believed in nurturing healthy relationships between faculty and students where professors can encourage their students to grow academically. He also understood the importance of boundaries between the two to ensure some level of fairness and growth in maturity. I agree with Father Moreau, I think it’s good to establish healthy connections between teachers and students. In my experience, the classes that I have a good relationship with the teacher in have always been incredibly more enjoyable, and I happen to do well in the class later on. I’ve had some classes with teachers who created a negative environment for their students, and the grade point average for those classes were always lower than the ones that were enjoyable. The theory that being kind and welcoming to your students makes them harder workers is entirely plausible, and it has been proven time and time again. Overall, the Notre Dame experience has shaped a new mindset for me, and I’ve become more empathetic and understanding towards others. https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/Panopto/Pages/Viewer.aspx?id=d14a0472-9c0e-44ea-bd39-53c67ee1d436 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23733/files/192471?module_item_id=109281