Moreau Integration




Moreau

Integration #3

To The Man That Held the Pen

We gather here today to remember a father, a husband, a son, a brother, and a friend. And

while he is gone, his memory does not go with him. John always questions what a “good life”

was, and if you were close to him, you knew he would ask these certain type of questions. While

many weren’t serious, he wanted to get down to what the good life was, and steered his life in

that direction. Looking back, I saw 6 major things that John focused on throughout his life.

First: self-reflection. While John was raised Catholic, he often felt his faith falter for

periods of time. He told me that he always felt reassured when close to God, and through prayer,

was able to reflect on his life. “What am I doing?” is the question he asked the most. “What am I

doing?” He said it not because he was angry at doing something wrong, nor did he say it because

he was proud of something he did. John loved the truth and knowing that he did the right thing.

He would beat himself up over making the wrong decision, leaving it unresolved for days on

end. It was through self-reflection and prayer, that he was able to calm himself. He was able to

ask “What am I doing?” and reflect on his day, week, month and life. It took him far into his life

until he realized that the past is the past, the future is too far away and the present is the now. So

I say to you, reflect often to learn, not to beat yourself up.

 was inspired by  (dad) who was inspired by 

(grandpa). He saw his dad working hard so every day that he worked just as hard for his dad to

be proud of him. To John, he thought only his successes and grades mattered to his parents, so he

would work himself into the ground, unknowing that grades didn’t matter to them. John looked



up to his dad’s determination to be a good person, to make others laugh (often at himself), to

always know what to do, and to be someone people liked. John realized that he was trying too

hard to be the same exact person as his dad. Take inspiration from people, but don’t be the same

person. You are your own person.

Why, why, why. John’s questions would become exhausting at some point, but you have

to admire his curiosity. He took the philosophers viewpoint of “question everything” extremely

seriously. This goes back to his reflection, but he would question things about his own life, not

just science and math. He would try and find the best way to live out his life. When going

through high school and college, he would often ask if he was making the right choice of major

and career path. He kept on asking questions and ended with two solutions. “I love science, I

love helping people.” Find what you love to do, not what is easy or you are told to do.

Exploration for John was more than just going somewhere you didn’t know. For John, it

was getting lost, finding your way back and making an exploration into a grand journey. I guess

that this was similar to John’s life. He never knew what he was going to do, but he always had a

goal in mind. The goal often changed but he was always determined to get there. He wasn’t

afraid to try new things, a long way from just pasta with butter and salt. His eagerness to learn

new things about people and the world led him to find the life he wanted to live. Always explore

new options and try new things.

John hit many obstacles through his life that I won’t share at this time, but there is a

lesson to be learned from them. A life outside of one's own may think that everyone has it easy,

and it is only you that faces the lows of life, but everyone has their own struggles. It is not

required to get through your problems on your own as John often did. Rely on others to help you;

you are not alone. You are never the first person to experience a problem. The most important



thing is to remember the important things in life whenever small bad things occur: friends,

family and health.

Meaningful relationships are hard to find throughout one’s life and toxic relationships can

easily form. I am happy to say that all who are here are fortunate enough to be called John’s true

friends. But especially in grade school and going into high school, people would bash on John

and take advantage of him and his personality. But it was the one’s that would text him how his

day was or if he wanted to get something to eat that mattered. John found that meaningful

relationships were one of the most important in the “good life.” Life doesn’t matter if you don’t

have people to enjoy it with. Living life together with other people makes life worth it. And by

surrounding himself with “good” people, John lived a “good life.”

So as I wrap this up, I hope you notice that the “goodness” of John’s life didn’t depend on

his accomplishments, his career or anything that gave him stress in his early age.  He would

often stress about a grade late into the night, and then forget about it a month later. Or getting

laid off from work, just to find a better job a week later. The happiness from John’s life came

from his reflection, his role models, his questions, his many quests, his problems, and most

important his relationships. He didn’t allow failure to overtake him, nor bad relationships that

caused him so many problems. He focused on the good and light in his life. It allowed him to

control his life and live the way he wanted to. He was truly the man that held the pen of his life.