moreau integration 2 Murphy 1 Professor Oswald Moreau Integration Paper 2 28 November 2021 Living Authentically and Compassionately Despite the brief period of time I’ve lived at Notre Dame, I can confidently say that it has been a transformative experience in terms of personal development and growth. While the choice to come to Notre Dame was not easily made, I haven’t once regretted the decision. It’s no easy task, leaving behind the comforts of home: my family, friends, and the simple pleasures of a smaller hometown. However, the close-knit community cultivated by the students of Notre Dame allowed for an easier transition that has allowed me to flourish both academically and socially. However, such a transition was not without hardship; grappling with my relatively more diverse identity at Notre Dame is an ongoing process, one with room for growth. One of the most notable challenges I’ve faced at the university is achieving a balance among academics, extracurriculars, mental and physical wellbeing, and my social life, particularly in the face of the high standards I’ve always set for myself. However, I’ve found more comfort in accepting my imperfection. Julie Hogan appropriately articulated my newfound mindset in her discussion on personal expectations, stating, “Instead of letting your life be ruled by the expectations of others or your own expectation that you have to be perfect, what if you just did your best?” (“Why Letting Go of Expectations is a Freeing Habit” by Julie Hogan, Moreau Week 9). Appreciating my best efforts for what they are has allowed me to cultivate greater self-respect and patience. However, my academic performance has often come at the cost of jeopardizing my physical and mental health. I’ve managed to achieve decent marks, yet it often comes at the expense of a mere five or six hours of sleep a night. And, by extension, the lack of sleep https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau Murphy 2 promotes feelings of stress, anxiety, and self-doubt. Next semester, I hope to craft a schedule that gives me more time to prioritize fitness and sleep in order to care for my mental and physical well-being. The mentality of finding comfort with “doing my best” must extend to all aspects of my life for a more cohesive, fulfilling college experience. One pleasant surprise in terms of my university experiences has been the general response to my standing with faith, as I currently identify as agnostic–not particularly common at a Catholic university. Coming to Notre Dame, I expected to feel ostracized on the basis of my religious beliefs from time to time. In fact, I’ve found quite the opposite. Upon learning of my religious status, most students tend to inquire further–what factors led me to believe what I do, what my exposure to various faiths has been, etc. Nearly each individual has exemplified one of the core tenets discussed by Father Jenkins in regard to faith: compassion. As Fr. Jenkins stated in his 2012 Wesley Theological Seminary Address, “To stand apart, proclaim my position, and refuse to talk except to judge does not reduce hatred or promote love.” ("Wesley Theological Seminary 2012 Commencement Address" by Father Jenkins, Moreau Week 10). Rather than showing me judgment, almost everyone has been incredibly welcoming and open to discussion, in addition to teaching me more about Catholic faith. I hope to bring this same mindset into the spring semester to learn more about Catholicism and theology as a whole, particularly within my Fundamentals of Theology class with other non-Christian students. One aspect of the student body that caught me relatively off guard was the variation in regards to social acceptance. As a bisexual student at a Catholic institution, I expected to encounter homophobia among some of the more conservative, religious students, yet I didn’t anticipate any would vocalize such beliefs so publicly. That is, until I read the article “No Man Can Serve Two Masters” published in The Irish Rover by a fellow student back in October. https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ Murphy 3 While the article was more harmful to Catholic LGBT students, it was incredibly difficult to hear such insensitive and discriminatory language cloaked behind the veil of “Catholic character”, particularly as someone who is openly and actively trying to learn more about Catholicism and appreciate its various dimensions. Once the article was published, however, I saw such an incredible emergence in support from students of all backgrounds, LGBT and allies alike. It was so inspiring and reaffirming to be able to have open discussions with these students about the article and LGBT culture at Notre Dame itself. It was a remarkable statement in regards to social progression at the university, particularly in terms of community building, as “Community begins not externally but in the recesses of the human heart. Long before community can be manifested in outward relationships, it must be present in the individual as a capacity for connectedness–a capacity to resist the forces of disconnection with which our culture and psyches are riddled.” (“Thirteen Ways of Looking at Community” by Parker J. Palmer, Moreau Week 11). This quote from Parker Palmer was a reminder that we as students can overcome hatred and intolerance through empathy, compassion, and unity as a community. My experience with the varying responses to The Irish Rover article inspired me to apply for a position with the GRC FIRE Starters, as I hope to become more involved with events on campus so that students from all walks of life feel comfortable, safe, and cherished on campus. Whether it's with the GRC or otherwise, I hope to work on advocacy initiatives across campus to generate lasting social change. Overall, I’ve found joy in being here at Notre Dame. However, such joy hasn’t always been easily obtainable. There have been days where I’ve struggled more, particularly in terms of maintaining healthy relationships with my friends and family despite the distance and succeeding in my classes. As described by C.S. Lewis, “As long as he lives on earth, periods of emotional http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ Murphy 4 and bodily richness and liveliness will alternate with periods of numbness and poverty [...] they are merely a natural phenomenon.” (The Screwtape Letters by C.S. Lewis, Moreau Week 12). Experiencing bad days is something that everyone goes through and is a natural part of life. Living through the bad allows us to have gratitude for the good. I’ve found that by establishing routines and finding activities that bring me joy, I can often keep the bad days at bay. Whether it's going for a walk along the lakes or playing piano in the chapel, finding time for myself where I can reflect and relax has been incredibly beneficial for me. However, not everyone I know has been fortunate enough to find healthy coping mechanisms on harder days. Despite the brevity of my experiences at Notre Dame, I’ve witnessed many of my friends face challenging days in regard to mental health. This, combined with my interest in mental health, motivated me to join the Active Minds club here at Notre Dame, in addition to the Active Minds Advocacy Committee. I’ve been fortunate enough to work on various mental health awareness initiatives at the university as a result. Next semester, I hope to implement these various initiatives (i.e. mental health syllabus statement, faculty training, etc.) so that students and faculty alike can better approach the subject of mental health and destigmatize conversation surrounding it. Thus, as a result of my experiences with mental health, I’ve become more involved on campus and have found methods of treating my own sources of mental discomfort which I hope to expand upon in the spring. Embracing my authentic self on campus and having the courage to express myself to my peers has been an engaging and inspiring experience. I’ve built connections with people I never anticipated meeting, and I’ve become more familiar with what brings me joy and how to handle that which does not. I’ve come to recognize some of the issues that are increasingly prevalent throughout campus, particularly in regards to the social climate, and through such recognition I https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28199/files/192826?module_item_id=109705 Murphy 5 have come to know an incredibly supporting, loving, and compassionate community. While my journey at Notre Dame has only just begun, the future appears full of opportunities for personal growth as my most authentic and compassionate self.