December 3rd, 2021

“Finding Tranquility in the Turbulent Waters of Freshman Year” 
Moreau First Year Experience
Fall 2021

Prompt: What have I encountered and how will I respond?

	With the fall semester coming to an end, as Freshman it is essential to look back and reflect on the most impactful moments, relationships, emotions, and overall learning experiences that have been lived, finding a way to contemplate, learn from, and adjust for the semester to come. Personally, the previous months have been ones of growth, personal development, and adjustment to a life that has exceeded my expectations. Everyone has their own unique response to the initially overwhelming question, “Why ND?,” but it is this individuality that makes the one-of-a-kind Notre Dame community. Specific instances such as spending time at the grotto, going to daily mass, and participating in discussion in classes like Moreau; I have explored the backgrounds and cultures of each individual I come across, allowing me to delve deep into the question of what makes me the person I am. Constantly going back to this central question of meaning and belonging, I have also begun to focus on the characteristics of my personality that add positive value to my community and those around me. Identifying what influences my actions, behaviors, emotions, and thoughts has been essential to achieving balance in such a chaotic environment and learning that every once in a while it is okay to say “no.” Being on my own in a place full of unlimited resources, support, and beautiful sceneries; the once overwhelmingly complex question of “what do I believe in?” has become a conversation I enjoy having and sharing with others as well. At Notre Dame, I find that we are given endless possibilities to become the student, friend, mentor, and overall person we have always wanted to be and hope to become. As Father Moreau intended, “Notre Dame is a vision that takes young people from their earliest days of grappling with ideas and making sense of the world around them to preparing them for lifelong discipleship in a supportive environment that nourishes their gifts and fuels their desire for God.” (“Holy Cross and Christian Education'' by James B. King - Moreau FYE Week Twelve). There is no doubt that through the ups and downs of the first few months of the “real world,” expectations are challenged, priorities are set, goals are created, and individual hopes and dreams push us to keep believing in what’s to come. 
	Contrary to popular belief, I sensed that following the first few months of my Notre Dame journey, social pressures and expectations have actually lowered in significance and presence among friends and family. In the beginning, the overwhelming reality of college is not always clear and tends to contrast the unique expectations of the individuals who arrive on campus. Many tend to mask their true selves with the fear of being judged by others, the fear of being a misfit in what is commonly known as the “ND family,” leading “these individuals [to] believe they must be perfect and that they must live up to the expectations of others (and themselves).” (“Why Letting Go of Expectations is a Freeing Habit” by Julia Hogan - Moreau FYE Week Nine) However, over time I’ve seen numerous individuals understand that perfection is just an illusion and begin to open up, become more vulnerable, and minimize the susceptibility to social pressures and the academic, familial, societal, and personal expectations that were present in the first place. As time goes on, the capability for true friendship and interpersonal connection is clear. For me, it was my relationship with God that really blossomed over this first semester, as stressors and expectations only pushed me closer to my faith and trusting that I can only control the effort I put into relationships, academic, friendships, etc. and for the rest I know God will do what’s right for me. I also came to value the importance of mindfulness, prayer, and rest. Notre Dame's “work hard play hard” mentality is not a lie, as with few exceptions, almost all students are busy doing something they love for the entirety of their days, making it difficult to balance time in order to meet all basic human needs as well as all social, health, and academic requirements. It’s difficult, yet possible, to find balance in such an environment, however this requires thought, commitment, and a few bumps in the road to find the right path to success. 
	Speaking in regards to the things that have become clearly significant or important in my life over the past few months, I also realize the previously simple aspects of everyday life that grew in complexity as the semester breezed past. Relationships, bonds between God, friends, and family, have been catalyzed, stagnated, transformed, and many even broken as a result of the first few months of college life. As previously mentioned, my personal relationship with God has only flourished and blossomed over the past few months; however, as I see my friends in other universities across the globe, I see how God, or any divine power, is slowly slipping away from their lives and so I’ve grown to value the Notre Dame institution so much more. Additionally, with distance and limited time, it has become clear to me who my true friends are, what I value most in these individuals, and how this may help me construct life-giving relationships with the new friends I come across in my college journey. I’ve realized that “we cultivate a capacity for connectedness through contemplation...we need other people for comfort, encouragement, and support, and for criticism, challenge, and collaboration.” (“Thirteen Ways of Looking at Community” by Parker J. Palmer - Moreau FYE Week Eleven) Being away from those individuals we once shared every second of the day with only deepens our love, our bond, and the value of those relationships that truly matter, filtering out those that are burdens rather than catalysts of personal growth and happiness. Although at times difficult to come to terms with, college is an experience with unimaginable changes both good and bad, which I am positive will shape me into the person I hope to become and give me the gift of discerning the things of most importance. 
	Reflecting back on the numerous days that made up the Fall semester, each different from the one before, I know each of those moments brought with them lessons both good and bad. Looking around me, I see many struggle to find their place, others battle with adjustments in their studies, friendships, faith, and love; while there exist a few that are unaffected by the college transition. As Father Jenkins states in his commencement speech, “[we] here today, more than others, have the responsibility, and the training, and the commitment to address the most urgent, most strategic challenge in the country today — the challenge of reducing hatred and promoting love...Love is the greatest commandment — and hatred is at the heart of the greatest sins.” (“Wesley Theological Seminary 2012 Commencement Address” by John I. Jenkins - Moreau FYE Week Ten) Not one of us is similar to our neighbor in how these first months have treated us; however, I am confident that I speak on behalf of my peers in saying that college has made clear the importance of unquestionable faith, trust in others, and love even for the person one disliked the most. Here at Notre Dame, as time goes on I know that I am always one step closer to becoming the student, the friend, the daughter, the leader, and most importantly the disciple I want to be. Through reflection, valuing the good and learning from the bad, I know that I continue to write and polish my answer to the question, “why ND?”.