Instructor Brian Reaume
Moreau First Year Experience
15 October 2021

Using Beliefs to Better Myself
	In anticipation of attending Notre Dame, I knew that my coming here would challenge me in a way that I wouldn’t experience at another university. Not only would my knowledge of content be put to the test, I would also have to confront my beliefs about what a meaningful life entails, whether or not there is a God, and how I can incite positive change in my community. I soon learned that delineating my beliefs is a lot harder than simply making a list; instead, beliefs are multifaceted, and I have to trace my beliefs back to their roots to really understand what they are.
	In my pursuit of identifying my beliefs, I realized the importance of cultivating beliefs substantiated by truth. I have maintained this thought for as long as I can remember, but it was really solidified as my core friend group in high school became closer. Additionally, my time in Moreau has aided me in identifying how I pursued truth in my experiences. My closest group of friends represented a number of nationalities: Indian, Pakistani, Chinese, Korean, and Rwandan. Having been exposed to peers with diverse backgrounds has led me to realize that any preconception I once had about their culture or lifestyle was severely limited. This realization aligns exactly with the point Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie makes in her Ted Talk, in which we only know the “single story” about those who we think are different from us, and more often than not, that single story is negative (“The danger of a single story” by Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie - Moreau FYE Week Seven). Essentially, I have tried to keep this shortcoming in mind while meeting people at Notre Dame--at first, there’s a lot more that I don’t know about someone than I do know. Thus, it has been my goal to talk to a diverse group of people and engage in conversation so that I gain exposure to more than just a single story. This has allowed me to identify various perspectives and always strive to pursue truth.
	In addition to working to pursue truth, I also believe that it is important to be truthful with myself and never try to be someone that I’m not. In order to achieve this, I have been searching for a better understanding of who I am. To me, this is important because it will help me to better recognize the progress I have made, make note of any shortcomings that I have, and ultimately strive to be a better person. Simply knowing myself is easier said than done, but I thought the exercise from Week 6 did a good job facilitating that search for identity. In an effort to emulate George Ella Lyon’s “Where I’m From” poem, in which he begins with “I am from clothespins,” I have written some statements of my own in order to identify where I think I’m from (“Where I'm From” by George Ella Lyon - Moreau FYE Week Six). After having been at Notre Dame for half of a semester, I would say that I am from Pangborn, a dorm with primarily freshmen that has allowed me to make some of the best friends I’ll ever have; Mendoza, a college that has an abundance of opportunities and has supported me wonderfully so far; and a longboard that has carried me to every end of campus. I think it’s important to list defining roots like that so I can always reflect and identify the primary influences in my life. Although, telling stories about myself and hearing others’ stories has also paved the way for my growth. In Week 5, I read about the ways in which stories shape my journey, and a quote by Carla Harris that stuck out to me was, “Pay attention to things as they happen to you, for when life comes to teach you a lesson, you will repeat the class if you don’t pass the test” (“2021 Laetare Medalist Address” by Carla Harris - Moreau FYE Week Five). To me, this emphasizes the importance of taking note of events in my life so that I am better prepared for adversity in the future. This strategy was particularly helpful when I began getting sick after coming here, which I soon realized was because I was staying up too late to either do some work or socialize. My lack of sleep significantly set me back, but learning from that experience helped me immensely. Ultimately, I feel that I have learned so much about myself since coming to Notre Dame, whether that was facilitated by listing my roots or telling stories about my experiences here. As I continue with my studies, I hope to always strive to not live life on autopilot but instead take it slow and continually reflect. 
	One belief that I feel particularly strong about is the idea that I can forge life-giving relationships by being vulnerable and showing understanding to my peers. In Week 1, our Moreau discussions were centered around the ways in which courage, vulnerability, and belonging can be a part of our search, and the concept of vulnerability struck a chord in me. Being vulnerable was never really discussed in high school or earlier on, so the idea that I should intentionally be open and allow others to come into my life made sense to me. In doing so, some positive unintended results can emerge: “people who have a strong sense of love and belonging believe they’re worthy of love and belonging” (“The power of vulnerability” by Brené Brown - Moreau FYE Week One). This was shared by Brené Brown in her Ted Talk, and I think it wonderfully illustrates how being open with others can lead to a sense that someone deserves love and belonging. Vulnerability has played a big role in my Notre Dame experience so far, as I had to lean on some friends after going through a tough situation recently. If I had not opened up to them, I would have bottled up my emotions, which would have been detrimental if held for too long--their support and reassurance helped me to see that everything would be okay. Likewise, it’s important that I give others the space to be vulnerable around me as well. Relationships should be reciprocative, which was explained well by the Healthy vs. Unhealthy Relationships table in Week 4: “Partners treat each other like they want to be treated and accept each other’s opinions, friends, and interests. They listen to each other” (“Healthy vs. Unhealthy Relationships” by The Red Flag Campaign - Moreau FYE Week Four). The most important piece of that quote is “they listen to each other” because the best way to show someone you care is to simply give them your attention and be there for them. For someone to be vulnerable, there must be someone on the other end willing to listen. I haven’t always seen the importance of vulnerability--for a long time, the connotation I associated with it was weakness. However, after learning about it in Moreau and practicing it here, I strongly believe that vulnerability is essential to a strong relationship. Going forward, I hope to continue to indicate to others that I’m someone they can be vulnerable to.
	Lastly, I believe that outward success isn’t as important as inner success. I have found that in college nearly everyone around me has huge aspirations; while I was expecting to find that here, there is a clear distinction between the levels of motivation of people in high school compared to college. Due to this pressure, I find myself comparing my accomplishments to those around me, hoping to stay ahead of the “competition.” Yet, I also find this mindset incredibly dumb. When all I think about is success in classes, clubs, and internships, I neglect my inner well-being, which is where I should really hope to find success. In Father Pete’s video from Week 3, he said, “The greatest journey you will ever go on is one of self-discovery. On this journey success, productivity, and failure are an afterthought” (“The Role of Faith in Our Story” by Fr. Pete McCormick, C.S.C. - Moreau FYE Week Three). This eloquently describes the previously described realization I have had. At the end of my life, I don’t think I will care about accomplishments on my resume as much as I care about being content with the person I became. Just like outward accomplishments, I found that I have to actively work for inner accomplishments too, a process that can be described by the following quote: “You go into yourself, you find the sin which you’ve committed over and again through your life, your signature sin out of which the others emerge, and you fight that sin and you wrestle with that sin, and out of that wrestling, that suffering, then a depth of character is constructed” (“Should You Live for Your Resume or Your Eulogy?” by David Brooks - Moreau FYE Week Two). As stated before, finding inner peace requires addressing the “sins” I commit. For me, I feel that I regularly lose sight of what is truly important, which I would say is my friends and family. Moreover, I don’t show them my love and appreciation often enough. I am so appreciative of the friends I have made at Notre Dame, but I am not certain that I have indicated that well enough. To me, that’s my biggest sin. However, I am excited for future opportunities to show those around me that I care. Consequently, I believe that I will become closer to achieving greater inner success.
	After spending almost two months at Notre Dame, I have had a lot of time to evaluate my beliefs, especially through the Moreau course. Consequently, I would say that I have solidified a handful of beliefs in relation to vulnerability, success, truth, and perspectives. I hope to continue to exhaust the resources here to further work on self-development.