Kyle, Integration Two Moreau FYE Professor Taylor 3 December 2021 Word Count: 1160 Truly Encountering Family When I came to Notre Dame, I never expected to be thrust so immediately into the community that I now take advantage of. Thinking back to just 13 weeks ago, a time when I was starting a brand new journey, traveling north just five hours; but that trip was more than five hours. The drive is five hours and leaving behind my family, the ones who love and care for me. That journey is leaving behind my friends and the situations I was comfortable with. That drive jumping into a new unknown. For the first half of my time here on campus, I really was still getting a feel for everything: the feelings on campus during gameday, the stress in the library approaching finals, the atmosphere of fun and community all around. While my classes have picked up, stress has increased, and the tastes of home during breaks have made it challenging, the people I’ve grown close with are there to support me, to help me, and to truly be a family. I have encountered dissonance while at Notre Dame. Throughout high school and especially now at Notre Dame, I have found myself forcing myself to fight for every grade. I spend lots of time studying and doing work, and with every grade that isn’t quite what I was hoping for I get sad and mad at myself. This has become especially apparent as I approach finals week. In these last few weeks of the semester, as I find myself cramming in papers, projects, quizzes, and assignments, as well as calculating my grades and what I need to get on the final, I find myself thinking that I am a failure when I realize I can’t get an A in a class. But thinking back to the Moreau materials, I think of the quotation “Many people suffering from imposter syndrome are afraid that if they ask about their performance, their fears will be confirmed.” (Elizabeth Cox, TED-Ed - Week Nine). While I myself have forced myself to understand that it isn’t the end of the world, and that all that matters is that I give it my all, my friends have been an amazing support group to help me through it. Studying with them, going through all of it with them, and complaining about our classes with them, has truly made me realize that I am not a failure, helping me to overcome dissonance. I have encountered brokenness at Notre Dame. I have been beat down by the papers and tests, the looming fear of grades not being what I hope for them to be. Sometimes I find it challenging when I look to the future and know that I still have the rest of undergraduate school, then medical school, then residency, before I can have the job I dream to have, especially when there’s the threat of failure at each step. The feeling that I won’t make it almost breaks me, but then I think of the quotation “Even if the Spirit brought you here, the world did not make it easy to arrive.” (Fr. Jenkins Seminary Commencement Address - Week 10). This quote elucidates the two-front dynamic of achieving your goals, the optimistic side that the Holy Spirit is guiding you through life, and the more pessimistic idea that the world is constantly giving challenges to stop you, and to break your spirit. With this, I realize that what I must do is focus on the optimistic side, to focus on the fun times with my friends, to focus on the good grades I’ve gotten and the fact that I’m at the greatest university on the face of the earth (in my unbiased opinion). With a good attitude, and my friends around me, I can overcome brokenness. I have encountered community at Notre Dame. Thinking now about how far I’ve come, going from being shy and introverted in high school to surrounded by so many meaningful friends, I often wonder how I have gotten here. Parker J. Palmer puts it best, “Community is not a goal to be achieved but a gift to be received.” (Parker J. Palmer - Week 11). I have been gifted with the friendship of my sectionmates. Having gotten close to them all from the beginning, my roommate and good friend Alex, my late-night-section-lounge-talk best friend Collin, and all of the others, I feel we have had this time to form our community. I have also been lucky enough to meet so many others outside of my hall, especially the massive friend group consisting of us Keough 4B guys, a dozen girls from Lewis, their friends from Lyons and PW, I now have all of these friends that I am so thankful for, because this community I have formed truly is a gift. Because of the amazing people around me, I truly have been able to embrace community. I have encountered hope at Notre Dame. “Everything works out in the end,” (, QQC - Week 12). That is what I told you, Professor Taylor, for my work, but it is also what I told myself. This was before things got hard, before I had to overcome the most recent challenges and trials of dissonance and brokenness. But in just a few weeks, I will be at home, having completed my first semester at the University of Notre Dame, having finished my first week of finals, having been done with 1/8th of my undergraduate college experience. To me, it is crazy to think about how far I’ve come; time has flown by so fast and no matter how many people tell me it will, it still catches me by surprise. When thinking about my tribulations, I must remember, “Human life is only a long way of the cross. It is not necessary to enter the chapel or the church to run over the various situations.” (Conference to sisters at St. Laurent, Holy Cross and Christian Education - Week 12). Just as is being said in this quotation, no matter what happens (I am going to say it again, because I will say it to myself over and over again, as many times as I need to), everything will work out in the end. I have completed a semester at Notre Dame, I have earned good grades, and I have made the closest of friends. Things look hopeful. With all that I have experienced since starting my journey at Notre Dame, it is clear to me that it is my friends that have helped me every step of the way. My friends have helped me overcome dissonance, and overcome brokenness. My friends have helped me embrace community and become hopeful. With all that my friends have done for me, I truly know that they are more than friends. The people that I surround myself with everyday have become my family. So, for today’s inspirational moment of the day, I admit that I truly have encountered family.