Moreau FYE Integration 3 Professor Retartha 3/4/2022 A Few Words About a Joyous Life If the people gathered here today are hearing these words, then I guess my time to leave this earth has recently come. While death itself is a sad event, try to not spend today mourning the loss of someone close to you. Instead, celebrate the time we did spend together because those are where the memories that matter were made. Looking back on my life, I realized that the older I got, the happier I got with my life. I believe that this comes from me applying the lessons I learned throughout my life, in order to try to live a better life. In life, happiness will come and go. Joy, on the other hand, “is much deeper and much more central” than happiness (“Three Key Questions” by Father Michael Himes - Moreau FYE week 3). Joy is derived from living a life that you are internally, genuinely happy with. In this eulogy, I will be sharing with you my process to living my best life, and hope that you will be able to take something from these words to help bring joy to your own lives. Throughout my many years, I heard people say that they were “never caught up with their lives” ( “Why We Need to Slow Down Our Lives” by Pico Iyer - Moreau FYE week 1). This is a common reality in today's world, which is sad because it is in contradiction with what a life well lived is. One should not feel like life is a constant drag or struggle. It shouldn’t feel like a To-Do list that is never ending. Something that contributes to making life feel overwhelming is getting caught up in distractions. We live in a world where the great technology we have makes it extremely difficult to avoid distractions. How many times a day does your phone buzz? Texts, calls, or even just a notification from your favorite game can all cause distractions that take away https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39614/modules/15864 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39614/modules/15864 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39614/modules/items/144347 hours of the day. Learning to filter out distractions and focus on what really matters is an important first step to living a life well-lived. The next step is finding out what really matters to you. In order to do this, it is important to take time for self-reflection. Be careful during the reflection process through, because one “can spend endless amounts of time in self-reflection but emerge with no more self-insight than [they] started” with if the self-reflection is done without a purpose ( “The Right Way to be Introspective” by Tasha Eurich - Moreau FYE week 6). I found it helpful to ask myself six guiding questions. First, was there anything that happened today that I was unhappy with? Second, why was I unhappy with said occurrence? Third, is there anything I could have done to change said occurrence? These three questions will guide you during self-reflection, allowing you to identify what bothers you, why it bothers you, and a possible solution. The next three questions are similar. Was there anything that happened today that brought me joy? Why do I think that occurrence brought me joy? Is there anything I can do to bring about said situation/occurrence more often? These last three questions guide one you during self-reflection too, allowing you to identify what brings you joy. It can also help to receive feedback from those closest to you. Speaking with someone in your life about your strengths, weaknesses, past experiences, and desired future can give valuable insight on what to do and/or work on in order to make your life as joyous as possible. Personally, I had one of these conversations with a previous volleyball coach during my second semester of freshman year of college. He told me that something that he believed was going to bring me success and joy was that “I had become unapologetically me” (Discernment Conversation Activity - Moreau FYE Week 5). Since that conversation I have kept that statement in mind. I got to a point at the end of high school where I was comfortable/confident with who I was, and I wasn’t going to change that for people. It https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39614/modules/items/144433 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39614/modules/items/144433 https://docs.google.com/document/u/0/d/1FEfDR-IR3d8EN2tZFBiu1XN2Q2ve8lb5vocAQ9OwX7Q/edit played a large role in my life, especially going to college and at my first place of employment post college. Once you have identified what brings joy and hinders joy in your life, the next step I followed to live a life well lived was focusing on the things that brought me joy, then putting most of my efforts into those things. For me, the three things that brought me the most joy were the close relationships I had, the hobbies I loved, and trying/experiencing new things. Starting with hobbies, I believe that finding a way to participate in what you love is a great source of joy for many. Each year, Notre Dame chooses a dozen where they honor 12 alumni under 32 for their excellence in faith, service, learning or work. One of the dozen for 2021 wrote about how he grew up loving the sport of rowing, so when he went to work at Cornell, he co-established the Cornell Rowing Club, where he remains a coach to this day” (Domer Dozen by Dr. Austin Hickman - Moreau FYE Week 2). While I have no interest in rowing, and don’t know the person personally, I admired and valued the idea of finding a way to continue with hobbies that bring you joy as you grow up. Second, pushing myself outside of my comfort zone to try new things is something that I believe is crucial to personal growth and joy in life. The reason for this is that the “only way to know more about yourself is to test [new] waters”. You have to “just get out and experience life” to find new things that you enjoy ( “Navigating Your Career Journey'' by Meruelo Family Center for Career Development - Moreau FYE Week 4). Whether it be something as small as trying new things or something as big as traveling the world by yourself, pushing your comfort zone a few times a week is a great way to grow as a person and possibly find joy. Third, and most important to me, most of the joy in my life was derived from the close relationships I had. People interact with other people hundreds of times a day. Those interactions https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39614/modules/items/144367 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39614/modules/items/144367 https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ build relationships, and are much needed to live a healthy life. People's lives “flow through [their] relationships with others'' (“Why the only future worth building includes everyone” by Pope Francis - Moreau FYE Week 7). Just like people's lives flow through their relationships with others, peoples joy spawns from and flows between close relationships with others. The friends and family that I made throughout my years gave me all the support, humor, and love I needed to build a healthy life filled with joy. To conclude this eulogy, I would like to leave everyone with one thing. Happiness will come and go, just like sadness, anger, worry, and all other emotions. Joy however, is something deeper. It is an internal peace and happiness with how you live your life. Strive to find joy in your lives, and in turn you will build yourself a life well lived. https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript