



































Interpersonal Communication Style of Broken Home in Friendship: Case Study in Yogyakarta


American Interdisciplinary Journal of Business 

and Economics 
ISSN: 2837-1909| Impact Factor : 4.6 

Volume. 9, Number 1; January-March, 2022; 

Published By: Scientific and Academic Development Institute (SADI) 

8933 Willis Ave Los Angeles, California 

https://sadipub.com/Journals/index.php/aijbe 

 

 

  

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FRIENDSHIP FUNCTIONS AND COMMUNICATION STYLES AMONG 

BROKEN HOME CHILDREN IN YOGYAKARTA 
 

 

Suciati, Cahyaning Pertiwi Harya 

Universitas Muhammadiyah Yogyakarta Indonesia 

 

Abstract: This case study examines the impact of divorce on the interpersonal communication styles of 

children from broken homes in Yogyakarta, Indonesia. Using qualitative methods, in-depth interviews were 

conducted with informants who were selected using purposive sampling techniques. Three communication 

styles were identified among broken home children and their friends: dominant, relaxed, and caring. The 

study also explored the factors influencing these communication styles, such as birth order and religiosity. 

The high divorce rate in Yogyakarta was cited as a contributing factor to the prevalence of broken homes in 

the area. The importance of positive communication styles was highlighted, emphasizing the role of parents 

and families in developing healthy communication patterns. The study contributes to understanding the 

impact of divorce on children's communication styles in broken homes and highlights the role of friendship 

and interpersonal communication in the lives of these children. 

Keywords: broken homes, divorce, communication styles, friendship, Yogyakarta, Indonesia, qualitative 

research, in-depth interviews, purposive sampling, birth order, religiosity, positive communication, parents, 

families, healthy communication patterns, impact of divorce. 

  

Introduction  

The purpose of marriage in Islam is to form a sakinah, mawadah, warahmah family. Imam Ibnu Qoyyim 

Rahimahullah revealed that the purpose of marriage includes three things, namely to protect offspring, 

lineage, and the glory of Islam (Yusuf, 2020). On the other hand, Fitzpatrick explained that the definition of 

family can be seen from three points of view. The first point of view is a structural definition that focuses on 

anyone who can be said to be a family, by looking at the presence or absence of family members such as 

parents, children, and other relatives. Based on this perspective, the notion of the family can emerge as 

families of origin, families of procreation, and extended families. The second point of view is a functional 

definition that focuses on tasks performed by the family such as caring for, and socializing children, providing 

emotional and material support, and fulfilling certain roles. This definition emphasizes the fulfillment of 

psychosocial tasks and functions. The third point of view is the transactional definition which considers a 

group that develops intimacy through behaviors that create a sense of identity as a family, in the form of 

emotional ties, historical experiences, and future aspirations (Sri Lestari, 2016).  

  However, the increase in the number of husband and wife divorces is seen as an incident that  

indicates a decline in family values. In the context of a broken home caused by the divorce of both parents, 

conflicts usually occur between children and parents due to poor communication. In the large psychology 

dictionary, a broken home is defined as a broken family or messy household. More specifically, it can be 

interpreted with the family or without the presence of one of the parents (father or mother). It can be caused 



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by death, divorce, leaving the family, and others (Chaplin, 2006). Divorce cases that occur in Indonesia are 

still relatively high. This can be seen from the data as follows:  

 
Picture 1. Divorce Rate in Indonesia in 2015 – 2020  

Source : (merdeka.com, 2020)  

Based on the data above, the graph of the divorce rate in Indonesia averages a quarter of the two million 

marriages in a year. Many of these cases can be caused by incompatibility, infidelity, not having good 

communication with one another, or due to economic problems (Agency, 2015). This condition of family 

disorganization due to divorce usually results in children feeling less attention from both parents and a lack 

of sense of value and norms from parents. Even though things like this are not necessarily experienced by all 

children who experience broken homes, what needs to be considered is if the child seeks his identity so that 

a negative interpersonal communication style develops.  

There are many interpersonal communication styles of broken home in society. For example, a child dared to 

drown his friend to death because he was annoyed that his debt of one thousand rupiahs was not paid 

(merdeka.com, 2013), as well as a case of child abuse where two pedestrians were stabbed because they were 

offended by being glared at (Ardhiangga, 2017). In both cases, children who are victims of broken homes 

tend to have an aggressive communication style. This is carried over to how they communicate in their 

environment. When interacting with someone, the victim becomes more emotional in communicating. The 

family problems they had since childhood traumatized them deeply. Lack of parental attention tends to make 

these children more out of control. With an aggressive style, an individual always defends his rights and what 

he believes in, feels superior, often violates the rights of others, and often ignores the feelings of others 

(Liliweri, 2011). Some of the characteristics when someone has an aggressive communication style are 

dominating, demanding others to obey, stubborn, impulsive, competitive, authoritarian, heartless, and easy 

to label (Rogacion in Suciati, 2015).  

According to De Bord, based on the results of several studies, the impact of divorce on children is almost 

always bad. Meanwhile, Demo & Acock said that teenagers who experience broken homes tend to be more 

mature because these teenagers have experienced growth by going through various kinds of problems they 

are experiencing (Ermilasari Danik, 2019). Events Broken home in a family are very likely to have an impact 

on children, both physically and psychologically. A divorce of both parents will have a negative impact on 

the psychological development of children, such as loss of affection, loss of motivation, and depression, and 

it is not uncommon for them to experience disorientation in their lives (Indra, 2017).  

In Yogyakarta, the divorce rate reaches 23%. The high divorce rate is partly due to many factors, namely 

education level, financial condition, and the impact of information technology. This was revealed by the Head 

of the Marriage Advisory, Development and Preservation Agency (BP4), Prof. Soewadi. According to him, 

it is necessary to form a joint action forum between BP4, the Indonesian Mosque Council, and the Regional 



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Office of the DIY Ministry of Religion to reduce the divorce rate in Yogyakarta (Danar, 2021). Based on 

research, most of the causes of divorce are due to constant fights due to jealousy and abandonment by their 

partners (Ari, 2020).  

Lots of researchers are interested in discussing the case of broken home. Research by Fitriyani, et al (2019) 

reveals that as a result of a broken home that has been experienced by a child since he was 4 years old, he 

feels jealous of his friends whose parents are still complete. He becomes a hater and even becomes a person 

who finds it difficult to believe and finds it difficult to forgive those who have wronged him. He felt his life 

was very unlucky. But with age, he began to realize his attitude and decided to get back up to live the days 

like any other child in general. Aziz’s research (2015) with the title Social Behavior of Adolescents Victims 

of Broken Homes in Various Perspectives, shows that the average social behavior of troubled children is 

motivated by broken family factors. Forms of their social behavior include talking or inviting friends to talk, 

like walking in class or occasionally asking permission to go out to the restroom, not understanding the 

lesson, not being polite to the teacher, not doing assignments, and having no desire to study likes to seek 

attention looks strange like spiky hair and dyed hair like a punk, dresses against school rules, and likes to 

annoy friends. Research from Fauzi (2020) shows that interpersonal communication in broken home that is 

not harmonious (negative) has a negative impact on children’s development. Children feel uncomfortable 

communicating with divorced parents. Unlike the case with broken home families which are harmonious 

(positive), children feel the love of their parents and have good communication with their parents even though 

they are divorced.  

For the life of a broken home child, the presence of friends is very important. There are at least 6 friendship 

functions, namely the function of togetherness, stimulation, physical support, ego support, social comparison, 

and intimacy. These functions will carry out their respective duties according to the needs and age 

development. Friendship is also shown as an attitude of voluntary interdependence from time to time, 

familiar, based on affection and mutual assistance (Miftakhuddin and Rony, 2020). With the significance of 

a friendship with the continuity of the interpersonal communication process, the researcher wants to describe 

the communication style of broken home children in friendship circles in Yogyakarta. This research 

contributes to being used as evaluation material for broken home and parents in order to have a positive 

communication style in their friendly environment.  

Theory Study  

Interpersonal Communication Style  

  Miller (2015) in his book Intimate Relationship defines interpersonal communication as a  

communication that occurs on a certain basis with a certain number of participants that are established on the 

basis of intimacy. Interpersonal communication occurs between two or more people when they have a close 

relationship so that they can convey immediate feedback in many ways. Meanwhile, Joseph A. Devito (2013) 

in his book Interpersonal Communication defines interpersonal communication as verbal and nonverbal 

interactions between two or more people who are interdependent on one another. The concept of 

interdependent people is interpersonal communication that occurs between people who are interrelated where 

they mutually influence one another. For example interdependent people, such as the relationship between a 

father and a child, two people who are having sex, two close friends, and sometimes also communication 

between several people in small intimate groups such as family.  

Bochner added that interpersonal communication is the process of sending messages by one person and 

receiving messages from other people or a small group of people with various impacts and opportunities to 

provide immediate feedback. Meanwhile, R. Wayne Pace added that interpersonal communication is a 

communication process that takes place between two or more people face to face where the sender can convey 

messages directly and the recipient of messages can receive and respond to messages directly (Ngalimun, 

2018).  

  In running life, communication is a very important component. A person’s communication style  



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can be seen when communicating verbally or nonverbally. Norton, Kirtley & Weaver define communication 

style as a cognitive process that accumulates the form of content so that it can be micro-assessed. Each style 

always reflects how each person accepts himself when he interacts with others. In addition, Gudykunst & 

Ting Toomey see communication styles as meta-messages, namely secondary communication about how 

information is interpreted, which contextualizes how verbal messages are recognized and interpreted. This 

definition explains the reasons why someone communicates. The purpose of communication is none other 

than an effort to be able to reflect on one’s personal identity so that it can influence the perceptions of others 

(Liliweri, 2011). According to Wibowo (in Suciati, 2015), communication style is a uniqueness that is owned 

by each individual. The difference in uniqueness can be seen in the communication style of each individual, 

including in the communication model, communication procedures, ways of expression, and the responses 

given or shown when communicating.  

 Various kinds of communication styles are displayed by each individual. Heffner classifies  

McCallister’s communication styles (in Liliweri, 2011) into three styles, namely:  

1. Passive style, namely, the way someone who tends to judge others is always right and more important 

than oneself.  

2. Assertive style, namely, the way someone communicates firmly and defends his own rights or opinions 

in order to defend the rights of others.  

3. Aggressive style, namely, the way of an individual who is very concerned with opinions or personal 

rights and often violates the rights of others, feels superior, and always ignores the feelings of others.  

  These character differences can also be conveyed in different ways to their surroundings. In  

addition, communication experts have also grouped several other types or categories of communication styles 

as revealed by Norton (in Liliweri, 2011) into ten types, namely:  

1. Dominant style, the way individuals want to continue to control a situation that exists in their personal 

social environment.  

2. Dramatic style, an individual way that is always exaggerated in conducting a conversation.  

3. Controversial style, the way individuals always express opinions quickly to challenge other 

individuals’ conversations.  

4. Animation style, the way individuals who communicate tend to use body language (nonverbal).  

5. Impression style, a way of communicating with individuals by stimulating others so that they are easy 

to remember.  

6. Relaxed style, an individual’s way of communicating like someone who doesn’t have life’s problems, 

such as calm, happy, and full of smiles and laughter.  

7. Attentive style, the way individuals communicate by showing full concern for other individuals.  

8. Open style, an honest individual way of communicating.  

9. Friendly style, an individual way of communicating properly and sincerely.  

10. Precise style, the way in which the speaker conducts a discussion appropriately when conducting a 

communication.  

Furthermore, Gamble (2005) suggests three types of communication styles, namely assertive, non-assertive, 

and aggressive styles, namely:  

1. Assertive Style, a person’s communication style that has the characteristics of being able to  

express feelings and self-esteem based on ethical thoughts and dare to act honestly and refuse a desire that 

might harm oneself personally.  

2. Non Assertive Style, is a communication style that is inversely proportional to the assertive style. This 

style allows others to be in a more dominant position, does not dare to tell the truth, and always puts aside 

one’s own desires.  

3. Aggressive style, is a person’s communication style who wants to always be in a dominant position 

and often takes actions that are detrimental to others to fight for personal desires.  



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This study uses the theory of communication style that was revealed by Norton because in his theory Norton 

explained that communication style is a process of gathering an event so that it can be assessed as a whole. 

Norton explained more forms of communication styles, whereas if you look at McCallister and Gamble’s 

communication styles they only focus on three styles. Life out there is a lot of broken homes that experience 

various kinds of different problems with different characters and traits.  

Research Method  

Type of research used in this research is descriptive qualitative with a case study method. According to Denzin 

and Lincoln (Anggito, 2018) stated that qualitative descriptive research is a step in which a researcher must 

explain or describe an object, as well as phenomena that will be included in a narrative text. The contents of 

the writing include data and facts collected in words or pictures based on events in the field, the purpose of 

which is to provide support for what is presented in the report. The object of this research is a case study of 

broken home in friendship circles in Yogyakarta. This study used data collection techniques through in-depth 

interviews.  

Qualitative research is carried out based on the philosophy of postpositivism because it is used to research 

natural object conditions, where the researcher is the key instrument, sampling of data sources is carried out 

purposively and snowball, where the technique of sampling data sources is carried out by combined 

triangulation (Anggito, 2018:8). However, in this study, researchers used a purposive sampling technique, 

because researchers appointed informants based on certain criteria. The criteria for informants in this study 

were: teenagers who have parents who have decided to separate for approximately 5 – 15 years (divorced), 

teenage age, not married, live at home with biological father or mother, domiciled in Yogyakarta. The criteria 

for friend informants include: having been friends for more than 1 year, not married, and being domiciled in 

Yogyakarta. The data validity technique used is triangulation. Triangulation is seeing reality from various 

points of view or perspectives, from various aspects so that it is more credible and accurate (Suparno, 2018).  

The data analysis technique used in this research is qualitative analysis. Qualitative data analysis according 

to Bodgan is the process of systematically searching for and compiling data obtained from interviews, and 

field notes so that it can be understood easily, and the findings can be informed to others (Zakariah, 2020). 

Qualitative data analysis techniques using the Miles and Michael Huberman models (in Nur Sayidah, 2018) 

were carried out through the stages of data collection, data reduction, data presentation, and conclusions.  

Discussion  

In this sub-chapter, the researcher analyzed the data based on the presentation of the data that had been 

obtained through in-depth interviews with informants who met the established criteria. The analysis is based 

on important points which are revealed as interview guide points as an operationalization of Norton’s concept 

of communication style. The number of pairs of informants studied was 3 pairs, namely pairs of broken home 

children and their friends: ST-AA, JF-DB, and DS-FA.  

Dominating behavior in communication  

Seorang individu akan diterima oleh individu lainnya jika dirinya dapat menanamkan sikap untuk menjadi 

pendengar yang baik agar bisa mengambil manfaat dari apa yang telah didengarkan. Individu yang selalu 

ingin berbicara dan selalu menjadi lebih adalah seorang individu yang enggan untuk didengarkan oleh 

individu lain (Dian, 2020). Berikut adalah data perilaku mendominasi dari ketiga informan:  

Tabel 1  

behavior of dominating broken home in communicating  

Informant  Dominant behaviour  

ST and AA  ST always talked a lot and did not give AA a chance to respond  

JF and DB  JF was able to create balanced communication with his friends  

DS and FA  DS wanted to continue to be heard when there were family problems. 



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A person’s characteristics can be influenced by birth order, this was stated by several experts such as Alfred, 

Adler, Kevin Leman, and Frank Salloway. Birth order can affect individuals in various conditions such as 

what role to play and how to adapt to social life. The eldest child is used to controlling his younger siblings, 

not infrequently when communicating, the eldest child always wants to speak and be heard, rather than listen 

to his younger siblings (Fauziyyah, 2018). attitude bossy that displayed makes him the dominant child, 

therefore the eldest child is also known as the type of child who is in control and often wants to always 

dominate everything. Such as when communicating and behaving (Vitamind, 2003). Factors that influence 

ST’s dominant behavior in communication are because he is the first child in his family. In the communication 

style, ST always wants to continue talking without listening to the other person. In fact, the creation of 

interactive communication is a communication model that considers feedback as important, so 

communication must be carried out in two directions (Fakhruddin, 2013). JF performs communication by 

providing feedback to DB. This makes their communication run smoothly. The more interactive the context 

of communication, the more activity in communication will result in the use of non-verbal cues, dynamics of 

communication, and in managing messages (Ali, 2020).  

Overacting behaviour in communication  

Overacting behavior is a behavior that is far from reasonable limits. For example, showing exaggerated 

expressions and using a high tone when speaking. Despite the fact that the expression generated by an 

individual is a form of conveying certain feelings or emotions. However, when showing expressions in an 

exaggerated way, can also create a quite strange and negative impression on the other person (Sutari, 2016). 

In addition, a person’s tone is also very important and can even exceed the message to be conveyed. People 

who use a high tone of voice are usually done as a form of disagreeing with the topic of conversation (Mira, 

2019). The high and low voices can determine the meaning or meaning of someone’s speech. The following 

is data on the over-acting behavior of the informants:  

Table 2  

Overacting behavior in communication  

Informant  Overacting behavior  

ST and AA  ST sometimes over-acts, by displaying exaggerated expressions and using high tones when 

speaking. He only did it when he wanted to break the ice.  

JF and DB  JF sometimes over-act by being more emotional only when they want to say certain things.  

DS and FA  DS sometimes over acting, speaking passionately only when they are annoyed.  

If you look at the styles displayed by the three pairs of informants when communicating, there are only a few 

indicators of overacting. Talking with an expression that doesn’t seem excessive, such as showing a natural 

smile and using a relaxed tone of voice, is the best way to build good communication, make friends, and 

cooperate with other parties (Sutari, 2016). Emotional control is also very much needed when doing a 

communication. In general, emotional means a reaction to something that is shown by individuals to other 

individuals (Alfiyansyah, 2020). But sometimes communication that is done emotionally can cause 

communication failure because you cannot control your emotions and are wrong in conveying these emotions 

(Widowati, 2005).  

Efforts to convey something in a state of sadness, anger, disappointment, and so on will affect the use of 

language and one’s attitude when speaking in public, in scientific forums, or speaking in casual situations. 

When emotional control is well cared for, it will also produce good conversations (Supriyadi and Nursia 

2019). Attitude overacting of someone with high doses in a friendly environment can become a distortion or 

disturbance that damages the balance of the friendship environment itself (Bartono, 2005). However, 

minimizing over-acting will help create effective communication which is marked by the exchange of 

information, ideas, feelings, and so on which will later result in changes in attitudes and views so that good 

relations are established between the sender and recipient of the message (Hardianto Alvian, 2020).  



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Opposing behaviour in communication  

A communication that is carried out spontaneously, which is like refusing a conversation can also cause 

communication failure, causing problems (Victoria, 2016). The following is data on the opposing behavior 

of the three informants:  

Table 3  

Opposing behaviour in communication  

Informant  Opposing behaviour  

ST and AA  Sometimes argues with conversations that are not in accordance with his thoughts. 

JF and DB  Always listen well to  

DS and FA  Always say sorry if they make a mistake  

Based on the table above, only the ST informant indicated that he denied the conversation, even though it 

was done occasionally. Carrying out the behavior of refuting other people’s conversations is basically an 

attitude that is not good if done (Abdillah, 2011). In communicating, empathy is also very necessary because 

empathetic listening means involving not only thoughts but also placing feelings in proportion. But to do 

that, every physical and psychological barrier must be removed and avoided, for example by not opposing 

the conversation or also maintaining physical distance from the other person (Martoredjo, 2014). A 

requirement for good communication is when someone will try to be a good listener by carrying out the 

stages of communication such as listening, understanding, then responding to the conversation (Chandra 

Dewi, 2022). Thus when you want to respond to the conversation, avoid being hasty in drawing conclusions.  

Using body language in communicating  

When interacting with other people, we are required to understand every attitude and movement. In 

understanding the character or nature of other people, nonverbal communication or body language can be the 

medium. The results of the study show that nonverbal communication shown by someone can reach 80% of 

all communication made. When using body language, there are several body parts that can be seen, such as 

eye contact, facial expressions, body movements, and other body parts. In addition, body language can also 

be used to see and understand the condition of a person’s soul (Budi, 2016). The following is data on the use 

of body language from the three pairs of informants:  

Table 4  

Using body language in communicating  

Informant  Body language  

ST and AA  expressions and emphasized intonation when they want to break the ice.  

JF and DB  show each other facial expressions when they are telling something.  

DS and FA  
use body language with gestures when they are tired, while facial expressions and funny tones are 

used when they want to be pampered.  

The three pairs of informants used body language when expressing something that complemented their verbal 

expressions. The two types of communication should ideally support each other to create an effective 

communication relationship (Yulistiani, 2021). In communicating, an individual will mix verbal and 

nonverbal language so that it becomes a unified meaning. Facial expressions are one of the nonverbal 

languages ??that can be used by someone. Expressions in the form of facial expressions are used in 

communication as a response to situations, either emotionally or reacting through implied messages (Budi, 

2016). Apart from using expressions, sign language is an expression that uses hand or arm movements that 

have been approved by the wearer and expressed in spoken language (Nasir, 2021). In communicating, 

expressions can also display a situation or situation that an individual is experiencing (Budi, 2016).  



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Relaxed behaviour in communication  

Emotional expression can be seen from the physiological changes that arise as a result of reactions to certain 

events or stimuli that cause emotions, these reactions, both internal and external, will bring up emotional 

expressions that are manifested in physiological appearance, including facial expressions, to attitudes and 

behavior. Emotional expression is also influenced by experience in interacting with other people (Darwis, 

2006). The following is data on relaxed behavior from the three pairs of informants:  

Table 5  

Relaxed behaviour in communication  

Informant  Relaxed behaviour  

ST and AA  ST did not do this because they often showed sour faces when they felt annoyed.  

JF and DB  Both expressed opinions without pressure as if they had no burdens in life.  

DS and FA  
DS didn’t do it because they still showed annoyed faces and spoke in a high tone when there was 

a problem.  

The most important thing when communicating is how individuals convey the right message to the right 

person. Of course, this is not easy, given the frequent occurrence of misunderstandings in the course of 

communication. Therefore the speaker needs to express thoughts or feelings properly, regularly, and 

systematically, with the right choice of words, good sentence structure, and an orderly way of thinking 

(Adawiyah, 202). Based on table 5, only JF and DB perform relaxed behavior when communicating, without 

the burden and without pressure.  

Show concern in communication  

Danim (in Arianti, 2018) defines motivation as strength, encouragement, need, enthusiasm, pressure, or 

psychological mechanisms that encourage a person or group of people to achieve certain achievements 

according to what they want. In addition to giving encouragement, asking how the situation the other person 

is experiencing includes a positive attitude that can raise the spirit of the other person. It can build a 

comfortable communication relationship. The interlocutor will be happy if the communication is carried out 

in a healthy and effective manner (Muhith Abdul, 2016). These ara the data of showing concern from three 

informants:  

Tabel 6  

Show concern in communication  

Informan  Kepedulian  

ST and AA  
ST gave encouragement and asked how their friends were going through, especially when they were 

also having problems.  

JF and DB  JF did not show attention , and tended not to care about their friends  

DS and FA  
They always listened to their complaints, reminded them, starting from small things, and also carried 

out actions such as making food frequently.  

When problems occur in friendship or one individual has problems, other individuals can help solve problems 

and provide emotional support effectively (Damayanti, 2017). In carrying out an activity, without realizing 

it, listening is the easiest activity and can have a big effect. Effective listening is listening with sincere and 

honest intentions to gain understanding without intending to refute the words heard (Ibrahim, 2011). Based 

on table 6, it appears that the DF and SA partners always care about their partners in all conditions.  

When someone has a deepening appreciation of the values ??of religious teachings, in other words having 

high religiosity will always be careful in thinking, speaking, and acting. Thus he can avoid behavior that is 

not good according to religious teachings. It is in this development process that a kind of nature, attitude, and 

quality of religiosity will be formed which will be displayed in behavior in everyday life (Purnamasari, 2014). 

The effect of religiosity is to measure the extent to which a person’s behavior is motivated by the teachings 



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of his religion in social life. For example, does someone do good by giving care to other people (Yanuarti, 

2018). This phenomenon can be seen in the behavior of DS in showing concern in communicating. DS has a 

highly sensitive person. He is very likely to behave very quickly angry about something that is not in line 

with his thoughts. However, because DS began to learn to worship and draw closer to Allah SWT, DS began 

to accept everything that happened in his life and became a better person. He realized that always behaving 

kindly to others was the value ??he had to develop.  

Honest behaviour in communication  

When communicating, honesty is very important and becomes one of the national characteristics which is 

reflected in human values. Honest behavior also underlies all other commendable behavior. Honesty is the 

ability to convey the truth, admit mistakes, be trustworthy and act respectfully (Wiseza, 2017). The following 

is the honesty data from the pairs of informants studied:  

Table 7  

Honest behaviour in communication  

Informan  Perilaku jujur  

ST dan AA  Speak honestly by reprimanding friends when they are doing something wrong, and everything 

they think will be conveyed.  

JF dan DB  didn’t do it because they always held it in by not expressing what was on their minds.  

DS dan FA  Be honest when you make a mistake but don’t be too open when you want to share personal 

problem  

In communicating, the characteristics of effective communication are openness (Devito, 2015). Quality in 

openness at least shows three points of view, the first is that they are open to each other when communicating 

until a change of information occurs, making communication relationships honest, and an individual must be 

responsible for what has been conveyed.  

In addition to creating an effective communication, openness is an important aspect of social skills. Openness 

can release feelings of guilt and anxiety (Gainau, 2009). Without openness, a person tends to get poor social 

acceptance so that it can affect communication and personality development. Based on table 7, it can be seen 

that ST develops honesty without having to feel uncomfortable in any communication behavior.  

Behave well in communication  

As social beings, humans do not only rely on their own strength, but need other humans in certain ways, and 

must respect, love, and care for each other. It’s the same with friendship. Friendship will last long when there 

is a concern between these friendships. From an Islamic perspective, Rasulullah SAW invited his people to 

care for fellow creatures of Allah, and work together to help each other. (Tabi’in, 2017). The following is 

data on good communication behavior from informants:  

Table 8  

Behave well in communication  

Informant  Behave well in communication  

ST and AA  
Communicating by behaving positively to friends who have problems, but not always done.  

JF and DB  
Appreciate when other people talk by not interrupting, but also avoid when they don’t want to 

talk.  

DS and FA  
Advise good things, but when they are not in a good condition they prefer to remain silent.  

When there is no sense of concern for friends, it will also cause a loss of harmony and trust in friends (Andri, 

2019). In the process of communication, respecting the interlocutor or other people is very important in living 

a life. Respecting others means having to be able to equate yourself and others on an equal level. That is, if 



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someone feels important or valuable, that person must also be aware or understand that other people are also 

important in the sense that they are as important or valuable as themselves (Panjaitan, 2014).  

Just like what JF did with DB, he would definitely listen to every conversation his friend had and didn’t 

interrupt the conversation. This will certainly make DB feel valued when communicating with him. JF’s 

behavior caused him to be respected by others. In living life, an individual needs other people to advise good 

things. Someone who is already good needs advice to be even better, while someone who is not good needs 

advice to be even better (Pramono, 2017). DS will let you know when the FA starts to show arrogance. He 

will definitely advise the FA to be a little humble and try to lower the ego. DS certainly did this so that FA 

could become a better person.  

Able to adjust the situation in communication  

When you want to start a communication, an individual needs to see the circumstances that you want to talk 

to when talking about a particular matter. This is known as social sensitivity. Social sensitivity or social 

sensitivity can be interpreted as a person’s actions to react quickly and appropriately to objects or social 

situations in the surrounding environment. Social sensitivity needs to be further developed to reduce 

egocentrism and develop a sense of empathy for other people around them (Pitoewas, Putri, and Yanzi 2020). 

The following is the adjustment data for the three informants:  

Table 9  

Able to adjust the situation in communication  

Informant  Adjusting condition  

ST and AA  
ST includes being less sensitive to circumstances, usually telling stories directly without 

looking at friends’ conditions/conditions.  

JF and DB  JF didn’t really take the initiative to ask questions about friends’ problems.  

DS and FA  DS will always be ready to provide feedback when friends ask to listen to their complaints  

Based on the data above, it can be seen that the three informants have variations in terms of adjusting to the 

circumstances or communication situation. In building a relationship, an individual often considers himself 

to be the most important, while the interests of other people are secondary so people lose concern (Alamsyah, 

2016). An individual thinks too much of himself and doesn’t want to know about others. Whereas humans 

always need other people. Therefore, underestimating or caring about others can lead to the continuation or 

cessation of a relationship. JF often immediately spoke without seeing DB’s state of readiness. JF only 

thought about his interests by continuing to talk about what JF was feeling, without looking at what DB was 

feeling. This can make good or bad communication takes place.  

In a social or friendship sphere, an individual is required to be able to adapt not only to himself but also to 

his environment. Self-adjustment demands to live and get along fairly with their environment so that 

teenagers feel satisfied with themselves and their environment (Kumalasari, 2012). Likewise, if the DS can 

adjust to see the state of the FA when speaking. FA started to show discomfort in the communication situation, 

DS will immediately say sorry to regenerate the comfortable situation when communicating.  

The following table describes the factors that influence the broken home child informant’s communication 

style in interacting with his friends.  

Table 10  

Affecting factors of Broken Home’s communication style  

Informant  
Interpersonal Communication 

Style  
Indicators  Affected Factor  



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ST  

  

  

Dominant Style  

– Always asking friends about 

problems  

  

– Always reprimanding friends for 

actions they don’t like  

  

  

The first child of three 

siblings.  

 

JF  Relaxed Style  
Conveying vent in a calm, happy, full 

of smiles and laughter..  
An only child  

   

DS  

  

  

Attentive Style  

– Listening to friends’ complaints  

  

– Advise friends  

  

– Make food during free time  

  

  

Religious factor  

Conclusion  

The interpersonal communication styles of broken homes from 3 pairs of informants in Yogyakarta are very 

varied. Based on the activities carried out with friends, their styles can be categorized as dominant style, 

relaxed style, and attentive style. The ST informant, who has a dominant style of friend seen as a child who 

always wants to talk without giving other friends a chance when communicating. He also always wants to 

know the problems experienced by his friends, even reprimands the behavior of friends that he does not agree 

with. ST’s communication style is because he is the first child of three siblings. This individual 

communication style is like someone who does not have life problems such as being calm, happy, and full of 

smiles and laughter.  

  Meanwhile, the JF informant has a relaxed style characterized by self-disclosure with smiles,  

laughter, and jokes, as if he felt no burden in life. This communication style is influenced by the status of JF 

who is the only child in his family. The personality of a person who is carried out to his friend can be 

influenced by birth order. Only children usually tend not to lose their dominant position over their family, 

because they remain the focus and center of attention. The attention that an only child always gets makes this 

position a positive outlook such as leading to achievement and a pleasant personality when compared to the 

second child, and so on.  

In informant III, DS has an attentive style such as always listening to complaints, reminding of small things, 

and often making food in his spare time. This can happen because it is influenced by religious factors. With 

high religiosity, DS carries out religious worship and rituals, reads the holy book, learns religious teachings 

and values, and lives up to religious doctrines and rites as his mother wants. In the end, this habit forms DS’ 

identity, understanding of his connectedness with the surrounding environment, and also the existence of a 

positive attitude as part of the existence of spirituality that occurs within him.  

Research Limitations  

Based on the researcher’s direct experience in this research process, some limitations are experienced and 

can be a factor to pay more attention to for future researchers to perfect it. There are several limitations in 

this study, including:  

The number of informants, which was only three people, is of course still insufficient to represent the 

real situation.  

Retrieval of informants with accidental sampling technique because not all broken home children are 

willing to be interviewed related to interpersonal communication styles with their best friends. Thus 

researchers need to have emotional closeness so that they are willing to provide information. Thus the 

purposive sampling technique (taking sampling into consideration) can be applied.  



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  In the data collection process, the information provided by informants through interviews was 

sometimes not in-depth and not as expected, this was influenced by the closeness of the researchers to 

the informants and also the honesty factor of the informants.  

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