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©Advance Educational Institute & Research Centre 

Volume 5, October 2018  
www.aeirc-edu.com 

ISSN 2412 - 3188 
 
 

Syeda Farah Batool 27 

 

Original Article                                                                                 DOI: 10.29052/2412-3188.v5.i1.2018.27-37 

Why Am I Not Happy Anymore? 
Syeda Farah Batool 

Ziauddin University, Karachi, Pakistan. 

Corresponding Author Email: farahbatool97@gmail.com 

Received 03/05/2018; Accepted 25/09/2018; Published 10/10/2018  

 

Abstract 

Background: A person needs to be happy to be a functional unit of the society and to add a 

positive and productive contribution on his behalf to the welfare of humanity. There is a very 

close interaction between sex and joy, and no one can escape from the fact that sexual 

interaction is mostly a pleasurable experience. The objective of this study was to determine the 

prevalence of compulsive sexual behavior among youth and to find a relation between 

happiness and sexual activity. Methodology: This cross-sectional survey was conducted in 

Karachi-Pakistan. 300 subjects of both genders participated in this study while Sadaf Stress 

Scale (SSS) was used to evaluate the stress level of the individuals and a section of the 

questionnaire contained questions about the routine activities, sexual needs and its severity. 

Results: Results have shown that the symptoms of hypersexuality are prevalent among the 

youth of ages between 18 to 25 years. While 27% of unmarried subjects have experienced sex 

and 49% reported masturbation or phone sex is found to be the source of happiness. 

Conclusion: Unfortunately, hypersexuality is not yet considered as a psychological 

disorder/issue in many regions of the world which gives rise to brutal and feeble act like 

“Sexual abuse”. It's high time to look into this matter before it’s too late. 

 

Keywords 

Happiness, Sexual activities, Hypersexuality, Pain, Compulsive Behavior 

 

Introduction  

Is SEX a key core of happiness? 

Undoubtedly, strong relationships play a 

vital role in building a strong and stable 

personality of an individual. A person 

cannot serve the society well if his mental 

and/or physical health is not satisfactory. A 

person needs to be happy to be a functional 

unit of the society and to add a positive and 

productive contribution on his behalf to the 

welfare of humanity (P. Alex Linley, 2009). 

 

The most important thing to be a strong 

contender of wellbeing, he/she must feel 

good about him/herself. Euphoria, 

contentment, delight, joy, gratitude and 

pride all refer to one feeling that is 

happiness (P. Alex Linley, 2009).  

 

Who doesn’t want to be happy?  

From the beginning, humans are trying to 

get that one feeling “Happiness”, and they 

mostly do anything to achieve that 

sensation (Diener & Diener, 1996). Here 

the question arises that what exactly this 

feeling is? A psychology researcher Sonja 

Lyubomirsky wrote in her book "The How 

of Happiness" that; "The feeling which 

makes you think that you are a positive 

well-being and makes you realize that your 

life has some meaning and it's worthwhile 

is known as "Happiness" (Lyubomirsky, 

2009). There are so many phenomena that 

count for people's well-being and happiness 

like; 

 

 

 

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Annals of Psychophysiology 
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Syeda Farah Batool 28 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Figure 1: Sources of happiness, (Assisi, 

2018) 

 

Researchers have found that humans need 

to be completely indulged in an activity to 

feel happy (Bradt, 2015). An activity itself 

is not a happy activity or a sad activity, it is 

something in your brain that perceive a 

specific situation in a certain manner. This 

perception may vary from person to person. 

For instance, a situation which makes you 

feel happy can make others sad or feel 

nothing. The relation between the person, 

situations, and circumstances collectively 

leaves an impact on human’s perception 

(Bradt, 2015). Some people might feel 

happy in what they are doing and are 

satisfied with what they have. But the 

existence of those people cannot be 

neglected who feel happy to see others in 

pain (Colino, 2017).  

 

Based on psycho-social behaviors, people 

can be classified into these groups; i.e. 

grateful and satisfied and others are 

unsatisfied and distressed (Baker, 2011). 

Those who are grateful for what they have 

and satisfied with what they are doing can 

live a peaceful life. But unsatisfied and 

distressed members of the society may lead 

to the destruction of his own and others’ 

lives (Baker, 2011). 

 

Jealousy, anger, envy, greed is some of the 

core reasons behind being distressed and 

unsatisfied (Chhikara, 2013). This clan of 

stressed people will need something 

extraordinary or sometimes evil deeds to 

achieve or to be in a satisfying state 

(Kathrym, 2013). Sometimes in severe 

cases, people usually feel happy while 

witnessing someone in distress or to imply 

their power on someone (Baker, 2011). 

People use different ways to gain a 

satisfactory sense. For example: 

 

 

Figure 2: Use of power (Chhikara, 2013) 

 

But the focused criteria of this study is to 

dig deep into the relationship between 

"Sexual activities and Happiness".  

 

There is a very close interaction between 

sex and joy, and no one can escape from the 

fact that sexual interaction is mostly a 

pleasurable experience (Kashdan, 2014). 

Many people have different sexual 

personalities. People might express their 

love and affection through sexual contact 

or they might elucidate their anger and 

hatred by means of sex (Kathrym, 2013).  

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Figure 3: Symptoms of hypersexuality 

(Batool, 2017) 

 

Normally when people have an intense 

sexual interaction with their partners, they 

usually feel relaxed and calm (Batool, 

2017). If a person expresses his love via 

intimate interactions; this could be a 

satisfactory experience for both the 

partners. But if someone wants to impose 

Love  and  
Respect

Appreciation  
and Fame

Achievement 

Money Power
Controlling 

others
Violence 

Bullying 
Sexual or 
emotional 

assault

Masturbation Obsession 
with sex

Excessive 
phone sex

Needs 
multiple 
partner

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Annals of Psychophysiology 
©Advance Educational Institute & Research Centre 

Volume 5, October 2018  
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ISSN 2412 - 3188 
 
 

Syeda Farah Batool 29 

 

his detestation, hate or power this might 

lead to worst experience for either or both 

the partners or only to the victim (Chhikara, 

2013).  

 

In Pakistan, the number of incidents of 

sexual abuse greatly increases during the 

past few years. (Ferozi, 2018). Especially 

with the children and young adults. 

According to a non-government 

organization ‘SAHIL’, approximately 11 

cases of “Rape and Murder” are reported in 

Pakistan every day (Ferozi, 2018).  The rate 

is highest in Punjab i.e. 1089 and in Sindh 

i.e. 490 cases in 2017 (Ferozi, 2018). This 

issue demands a great deal of attention. The 

increasing rate of ‘Sexual Abuse’ in the 

world, especially in Pakistan is an alarming 

situation not only for the authorities but for 

all of us. There can be enormous reasons 

behind this, but an uncontrollable urge to 

have sex, or in other words ‘Hypersexuality 

or Compulsive Sexual behavior’ might be 

the core reason (Freimuth et al.,  2008). 

Hypersexuality is the increased frequency 

of sexual desire or intimacy.  

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Figure 4: Cycle of intimacy  

(Keith & Montgomery, 2008) 

 

But in some cases, the gap between 

resolution and desire is very less, or mostly 

neglectable, which will give rise to an urge 

of sex (Keith & Montgomery, 2008). 

Sometimes this feeling is uncontrollable 

that a person can even abuse others to get 

distressed. Generally, it happens that an 

individual is not happy with one partner, 

especially men as their emotional, physical 

and sexual needs are much different than a 

woman (Assari, 2018). 

 

Sexual abuse is itself a very pitiful act 

rather attempt such feeble sin to make 

others suffer. It is proven through many 

researches that sometimes the cost of your 

happiness is someone else's pain (Kathrym, 

2013). Some people feel happy when they 

impose their power onto others. To cause 

one to suffer from pain could be a great 

source of contentment to another (Brenner, 

2016).  

 

A publicly discussed incident of “Rape and 

Murder” of a 6-year-old girl child, on 4th 

January 2018 (Tribune, 2018), was an 

inspiration behind this study.  

 
Methodology 

A cross-sectional survey was conducted in 

a population of about 300 participants with 

their consent. Some of the data was also 

collected from the male customers in 

prostitution bars with their proper consent. 

But for privacy issues, the source and 

subjects cannot be disclosed.  

 

During this survey, all the participants were 

asked to fill a questionnaire. Subjects were 

then assessed and analyzed based on the 

answers given. These subjects belonged to 

different educational and ethnic groups. 

Married and unmarried, both groups are 

included in this study. An average age 

group of the subjects in this study is 

between 18-25 years, (with few exceptions 

of 26 - 28 years).  

 

To make analysis easier subjects were 

divided into Group: 1 Male and married, 

Group: 2 Male and unmarried. Group: 3 

Desire 

Arousal

Orgasm

Resolution

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Syeda Farah Batool 30 

 

Female and married Group: 4 Female and 

unmarried. Sadaf Stress Scale (SSS) was 

used to check the emotional, traumatic and 

psychological stress whereas Microsoft 

Excel was used to calculate and shaping the 

results into graphical forms. All the 

subjects with severe PTSD and other 

psychological disorders were excluded. To 

avoid biasness and subject manipulation 

most of the questions in the survey were 

kept open-ended. 

 

Results 

Results that were obtained from analyzing 

the data are alarming. When subjects were 

asked to answer the questions following 

responses were obtained. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 
Figure 5: Things that give feelings of happiness 

 

Figure 5 shows the percentage of subjects who mentioned things that make them happy and 

65% of them have reported Sex as a process which can bring happiness. 

 
Figure 6: Prevalence of Stress and pain in study subjects  

 

Figure 6 shows the percentage of the subjects that are suffering from deep pain and stress and 

most of them had a traumatic background of different severities. 

0

10

20

30

40

50

60

70

80

90

Money Love Fame Respect Power Sex Reward

81 79

56

89

67 65

85

P
er

ce
n

ta
ge

s

Yes, 63

No, 43

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Annals of Psychophysiology 
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Volume 5, October 2018  
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Syeda Farah Batool 31 

 

 
Figure 7: Coping strategies with Stress 

 

Figure 7 shows the percentage of the methods or practice subjects used by the subjects of the 

study to cope with the stress and many participants have reported that smoking and 

masturbation as a practice that helps them to de-stress themselves. 

 

 

 
 

Figure 8: Participants who have experienced sex both in married and  

Un-married groups. 

 

When the subjects of both the groups (married and unmarried) were asked about their sexual 

life, an unexpected result was attained. Figure 8 shows the percentage of the participants who 

have experienced sexual intercourse both in married and unmarried groups. 

0

10

20

30

40

50

60

35

47

59

33
29

46
49

37 39

P
er

ce
n

ta
ge

s 

0

10

20

30

40

50

60

70

80

90

100

Sex/Married Sex/Unmarried

95

27

P
er

ce
n

ta
ge

s

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Volume 5, October 2018  
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ISSN 2412 - 3188 
 
 

Syeda Farah Batool 32 

 

 
Figure 9: Subjects who perceive sex as a pleasurable experience.  

 

Figure 9 shows the percentage of the subjects that perceive sex as a pleasurable experience or 

not. There are a few participants who have reported that sometimes this is a pleasurable 

experience and sometimes it’s not. 

 

 
Figure 10: Individuals who had abused someone 

 

The worst part of an individual’s personality has come to life when he abuses someone. Figure 

10 shows the percentage of the participants who have abused someone. 

 

 

 

55

30

15

43

27

30

0 10 20 30 40 50 60

Yes

No

Sometime

Percentages

se
x 

as
 p

le
as

u
ra

b
le

 e
xp

e
ri

e
n

ce
 

Female Male

Yes, 13

No, 87

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Volume 5, October 2018  
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Syeda Farah Batool 33 

 

 
 

Figure 11: Victims of sexual abuse and assault in both male and female 

 

It is hard to confess about a bitter truth of abuse, but facing the reality makes it easier to survive. 

Figure 11 shows the percentage of the victims of sexual abuse and assault in both male and 

female. 
 

 
Figure 12: Signs and symptoms experienced by the victims of abuse. 

 

A person may suffer from a cascade of the symptoms of post-traumatic stress disorder after a 

traumatic event. Figure 12 shows the percentage of the most reported signs and symptoms of 

the victims of sexual abuse. 

 

3

40

0 10 20 30 40 50

Male

Female

Percentages

V
ic

ti
m

s

0

20

40

60

80

100 87
78

69

54
46

37 33
23 19

p
e

rc
e

n
ta

ge
s 

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Volume 5, October 2018  
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ISSN 2412 - 3188 
 
 

Syeda Farah Batool 34 

 

 
 

Figure 13: Abusing someone give happiness 

 

When subjects were asked that abusing someone make you happy? The results were shocking 

27% of males have reported that harassing or abusing someone could be a reason for the 

pleasure of an individual. Figure 13 shows the exact results. 

 

 

 
Figure 14: Perceive pain as a pleasure 

 

Pain of any sort could be the worst experience for an individual, but sometimes pain could be 

a source of satiety especially if it is of others. Figure 14 shows the percentage of the subjects 

who perceives Pain as a pleasure. 

 

There are some distinct mentions other than the statistical analysis. When the subjects were 

asked that ‘how many times in a week one must have sex?' The answers vary from 3 times to 

14 times* a week. When the highest time mentioned subjects were inquired further 37%* of 

them have reported that the frequency, as well as the intensity of the sex, is highly important 

to extract pleasure.  

 

*Note: The results only implicate males of both groups Married and Un-married

27

5

73

95

0 20 40 60 80 100 120

male

female

Percentages

yes No

0

5

10

15

20

25

30

35

40

45

50

Yes No Sometime

36

50

14

P
e

rc
e

n
ta

ge
s

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Syeda Farah Batool 35 

 
 

 

Discussion 

Sex could be a pleasurable experience and 

has many health benefits without a doubt, 

as it is a natural need of living beings to 

make sexual contacts with their mates, 

people feel happy after any sexual activity 

or sexual intercourse (Stuart, 2010). The 

needs of male and female are totally 

different in terms of intensity and frequency 

(Kinsey, 1998.). That might be the reason 

why more men opted for different intimate 

means as compared to women (Kinsey, 

1998.). In figure 5, 65% of the participants 

have mentioned that sex is a source of 

happiness for them and many perceive Sex 

as a pleasurable practice. Unfortunately, the 

excessive urge to have sex or 

hypersexuality is yet not considered as a 

psychological disorder because there is no 

upper limit of having sex. There are no such 

measures through which this condition 

could be diagnosed. Sex can undoubtedly 

be a pleasurable experience if both 

partner’s concern is taken (Assari, 2018). 

But this could be miserable one if one is 

forced to intimate. Figure 6 reveals the ratio 

of stress among the subjects. The high value 

of stress means less satiety and if a person 

doesn't feel satisfied he will seek for more 

(Baker, 2011). In a city like Karachi, which 

is the busiest and one of the most stressful 

city in the world people don't need to look 

up for stress because it stays at their 

doorstep. For youngsters, the biggest terror 

is ‘Exams', for teen its ‘Love' or 

‘Relationships' and for married couples its 

‘Family occupation’ (Harvey, 2004). 

 

On contrary to this there are so many 

reasons to stay happy and grateful for 

example being able to perform daily work, 

got a chance to meet your friend after a long 

time.  So, we all are surrounded with a 

bunch of stresses and plenty of reasons to 

smile, but the choice is ours (Baker, 2011). 

Sometimes reason of contentment has 

shifted to a negative side, and individual 

start to seek joy only in activities like 

drinking, smoking, sex or abuse (Kathrym, 

2013).  

 

Usually, a more depressed person 

experiences bad sex or an unwanted or bad 

sex may lead to depression because it 

stimulates stress cascade in our brain 

(Assari, 2018). According to this study 43% 

subjects were in pain or moderate or severe 

stress and have a traumatic background 

(Figure 6), and when they were asked that 

what they do to relive their stress 

approximately 49% subjects have reported 

by watching porn/masturbation or by 

having sex (Figure 7). Results have 

revealed that about 27% of unmarried 

subjects have experienced sex and about 

13% have tried or did abuse someone 

(Figure 8 & Figure 10 respectively). 

Although in many countries having sexual 

interactions before marriage or live-in 

relationships are common and acceptable 

but in Pakistan, it's still considered as a bad 

thing as the majority of the population are 

Muslims, and in such a country this number 

is alarming! More shocking thing is that a 

considerable number of the participants of 

this study wanted to abuse someone and 

40% of the subjects were abused most of 

them were female (Figure 11). 

 

As after a bad sex you feel stressed (Figure 

12), it shows that 87% have felt stressed 

after being abused, 74% felt helpless after 

the incident and approximately 60% have 

reported anxiety irritability and anger as 

their symptoms. This is a huge number of 

individuals and it is with no doubt that 

stress can lead to massive personality 

issues. 

 

When subjects were inquired that whether 

they perceive pain as a pleasure or not 36% 

were yes and 14% said sometimes (Figure 

14).  Aldous Huxley wrote in his book 

“Brave New World” in 1932, that; “Endless 

pleasure may lead to dystopian societies”. 

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Syeda Farah Batool 36 

 
 

“So, pain must be there to feel the goods 

around us”. But if someone is addicted to 

pain and causes others to suffer is a 

psychological condition (Keith & 

Montgomery, 2008). It is proven that 

psychological health matters a lot to build 

stable and strong relationships (Bradt, 

2015) 

 

Conclusion 

Psychology has become a blooming science 

since past few decades. There are so many 

psychological issues which need to be dealt 

with appropriately. Unfortunately, Pakistan 

is lacking in this issue as there are so many 

social and cultural norms that in captivate 

the people. People usually don't speak up 

for such things which are making the 

situation even worse. Especially a topic like 

SEX or RAPE is such a ‘no' ‘no' word in 

most families. That might be the reason 

why ‘rape' cases are increasing massively. 

Talking to someone is the best therapy to 

relieve stress. We need to build tolerance 

for others and should try to listen to them. 

The symptoms of compulsive sexual 

behavior can be controlled if we try to 

consider as an issue which needs to be 

resolved. 

 

Conflict of Interest 

None. 

 

Acknowledgment 

Hearty gratitude to all the participants and 

my teachers especially Dr. Sadaf Ahmed 

and Mr. Faizan Mirza for supporting me 

throughout the journey. 

 

Funding 

None. 

 

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