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CALIFORNIA SOCIOLOGY FORUM VOL. 7 

Roles and Impressions within Romantic Relationships and 
Heartbreak 

Taryn Bates 
Department of Sociology 

California State University, Los Angeles 
 
 
EXPLANATION OF SOCIOLOGICAL RELEVANCE 
 
This collection of four poems explores the breakdown of romantic 
relationships that leads to heartbreak through the use of 
metaphorical and allegorical comparison, particularly through 
imagery found in fairytales or mythical and mystical lore. 
Sociology has a keen interest in the dynamics of social 
relationships, which includes how individuals collectively 
navigate romantic connections. Such relationship interactions 
have become key sociological topics, with several sociological 
theories offering insight into ways of understanding interpersonal 
communication and conscious or subconscious negotiations that 
occur. According to role theory, social interactions are greatly 
informed by established norms and presumed or assumed roles. 
Under exchange theory, relationships can be viewed as 
continually weighing pros and cons or as gauging trade-offs of 
costs and benefits, including comparing alternative options when 
deciding to continue a relationship. Impression formation often 
comes into play for one’s overall perception of others and 
impression management is the act of someone trying to endear or 
ingratiate oneself with others when attempting to maintain or even 
strengthen a relationship bond. Role strain occurs when an 
individual within a relationship feels like they are unable to 
uphold that which is expected of them. Romantic relationships 
tend to be even more heightened than average interpersonal 
relationships due to heightened feelings and emotions. Symbolic 
interactionism can emerge as romantic partners try to make 
gestures of love towards one another, but such symbolism does 
not guarantee relational compatibility. 
 
 
 



Creative Works | Poetry | Bates 102 

CALIFORNIA SOCIOLOGY FORUM VOL. 7 

A Fairytale, Ending 
How far I've come, how far you're gone 

Instead of queen, I was your pawn 
 

What once upon a time you swore 
Became a never-ending chore 

 
You live happily, I live ever after 

An unfair tale now ending in disaster 
 

I slept through all the lies it seems 
For this is nothing like my dreams 

 
Between all the words you never wrote, and the ones I never read 

We let too many things ride off and pass us by unsaid 
 

Your noble steed has shrunk in size 
There is no place for me at your side 

 
Your siren voice did play its part 

Alluring out my foolish heart 
 

You fished me out to help me roam 
But interest dissolved like sea foam 

 
Which apple was coated with your spell? 

How blindly for your charms I fell 
 

To the eye your looks did please 
But underneath there hid a beast 

 
Your big blue eyes and winning grin 
Distracting signs of the wolf within 

 
The magic shoe slipped off my foot 

You smashed it to pieces with nary a look 
 

No wonder left in Neverland 
You lost me when you forced my hand 

 
I closed my eyes to kiss you hard 

When I should have been on my guard 
 

I closed my eyes to kiss your cheek 
But should have known a frog was weak  



Creative Works | Poetry | Bates 103 

CALIFORNIA SOCIOLOGY FORUM VOL. 7 

Pinocchio Pawn 
These puppet strings entangle me and confuse my every step 
I try to gather what little strength is left in me,  
but the struggle seems in vain 
Every limb and my very heart are still controlled by you 
Every movement, a memory of submitting to your masterful manipulation 
I feel half alive but hardened to this world 
I can't take a step without feeling  
the remnants of your power tugging me back 
I speak lies - even to myself- without realizing until I see a mirror 
Then my growing nose shows my folly and downfall 
I wish to be real but flesh and blood hurt, too 
Which is worse? 
The pain of being trapped or of breaking free? 
You praised my looks and performance  
but the compliments were just more ways of binding me to you 
Did I play my part well, master? 
Was I everything you whittled me down to be? 
This wooden shell my prison and casket be 
as I rot away, hidden from the world's eye 
They see my painted-on expression of contentment  
but that which controls me remains invisible to them 
I need to sever the ties that hold me to you 

I'm a Real Girl now 
 
 
 

Holy Grail 
A romantic gift asked for in innocence 
Now sits untouched of true experience 

Too many thoughts of use led to idealization 
Cementing its spot on the shelf in realization 

That when you give something worth 
Sometimes perception overshadows its birth 

Naive eyes open wide to what appears 
Seeing something forever tainted by our fears 

 
 
 

AFTERLIFE 
When you ghosted me, 

at first 
I hoped to haunt 

your ever-waking step 
with hell fury 

I'd slip 



Creative Works | Poetry | Bates 104 

CALIFORNIA SOCIOLOGY FORUM VOL. 7 

into 
your dreams 
your things 

your very way of life 
You'd think of me 
with grand regret 

seeing visions 
that you can't reject 

yet knowing  
there would be no belief 
or support from others 

over what you were seeing 
no relief 

The tables would turn 
from the beyond 
the one spurned 

now taunting you 
No heavenly respite 

from the raging storm 
You could not love 

so turned my heart to hate 
The borderlines for favorites 

split at the seams 
to extremes 

Fraying nerves and alliances 
 

But I am not a specter 
I never meant to be menacing 

or unpleasant 
or life draining 
My own fears  

forced meaning 
from apparitions 

projections too fantastical 
for any living being 

to embody 
 

So, it is up to you 
to remember 

to forget 
all your deeds 
and dealings 

Because 
if I haunt you 

I'd have to haunt me, too 


	Roles and Impressions within Romantic Relationships and Heartbreak - Taryn Bates



