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Self-Querying Process (SQP): A Technique for Attaining 

Clarity through Self-Analysis 

 

By  

Duve Nakolisa 

 

 

Abstract 

This paper presents aspects of the author’s innovative Self-Querying Process (SQP), 

which he espouses as a practical technique for attaining clarity through self-analysis. It 

is a complement to his “bevalhabismic theory” (Nakolisa, 2022) which posits that the 

belief-values-habit (BVH) make-up of an individual is the fundamental cause of their 

ability or inability to achieve set goals. The SQP process consists of two self-

administered exercises: the Self-Probing Talk (SPT) and the Guided Question and 

Answer (GQA) session. The SPT talk induces the individual to recall personal issues 

and events given rise to by their BVH framework with a view to analyzing their 

implication for the pursuit of set goals. The GQA exercise methodically narrows the 

clues the individual emerges with from the Self-Probing Talk into two clear options: 

positive (+) or negative (-), thereby reducing otherwise complicated issues of personal 

dilemma into two clear options that enhance the individual’s ability to choose and take a 

definite, success-generating, course of action. 

Keywords: BVH, SQP, Self-Querying Process, SPT, Self-Probing Talk, GQA 

  

 

Introduction 

Let’s begin with an explanation. The Self-Querying Process (SQP) is a 

method of self-analysis I designed to enable anyone faced with a difficult 

problem to rouse and examine their thoughts, feelings, and past choices 

in order to gain the clarity of mind they need to make a quality goal-

driven decision that paves the way for a possible solution. Each SQP 

activity should be an exercise aimed at reaching, from the perspective of 



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the individual employing the method, the best decision regarding a vital 

issue of his or her life. 

The Self-Querying Process is made up of two soul-searching activities:  

 Self-Probing Talk (SPT), and  

 Guided Question and Answer (GQA) exercise. 

The SPT and GQA sessions are explained below. 

The Self-Probing Talk 

The Self-Querying Process (SQP) starts with the Self-Probing Talk 

(SPT). The SPT is a self-examination exercise in which one may or may 

not talk aloud. It appears more effective when one talks quietly to 

oneself, letting the voice of one’s inner being respond to the issue of the 

moment.  

The SPT entails one’s inner self talking to one’s outer self. It could be a 

monologue or a “dialogue” of sorts. The SPT is essentially an exercise 

dominated by the inner self who utters into one’s consciousness truths, 

sometimes disturbing truths, long suppressed and hidden in the mind’s 

bid to make one overlook or forget the unpleasant or unresolved aspects 

of one’s life.  

The SPT function is like turning one’s pant inside out in order to see how 

clean or dirty it really is, what caused the dirt, and what kind of laundry 

is required to clean it. The SPT, if you like, is an auto-dialogue in which 

one engages with oneself to thrash out a critical personal matter.  

An important idea behind the SPT concept is the notion that every 

problem contains the seed of its own solution. In other words, the closest 

solution to everyone’s personal problem lies within them. If the 

individual can dig deep enough into the recesses of their being, speaking 

out relevant data about a given area of their life, there is a huge 

possibility of “unearthing” a useful, relevant or appropriate direction, 

decision or solution.  

A complementary concept behind the SPT is my understanding that 

everyone is largely a reflection of all the choices they have made 

(including their response to other people’s choices) and all the actions 

they have taken or failed to take (including their response to other 

people’s actions and inactions). Most personal problems arise out of 

wrong choices and actions (including one’s responses to other people’s 

wrong choices, actions and inactions).  



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The SPT is an inward exploration in which the individual looks deeply 

inwards and voices out the happenings and intimations of their past as 

they relate to a given current problem. While there is no strict procedural 

formula for the SPT, it should be conducted as an investigative soul-

searching talk. You can sit down and begin to think about the difficult 

challenge staring you in the face. “How did things get this bad?” you 

might audibly ask, and then proceed by reviewing your past and present 

journey in that area of your life, noting key incidences that point to what 

happened, when they happened, where they happened, and how they 

happened? Be analytical, think through scenarios, make necessary 

linkages and observations, and draw tentative conclusions that might give 

you clues regarding the way forward. 

It must be borne in mind that the underlying aim of the SPT talk is to 

take you forward, not backward. Why digging into the past is necessary 

is because it traces the build-up of events that led, directly or indirectly, 

to the crisis of the moment, thereby enlarging the scope of the problem-

solver’s understanding.  

Even if the events recalled during the talk have little connection with the 

past choices and actions of the solution-seeker, the SPT talk will help in 

heightening the moment of crisis and in arousing the person recalling his 

journey to seek new, better, or more promising paths. Unless agitated 

into taking action, many people would rather tarry with their problems as 

long as it has not completely swept them out of their comfort zone.  

One of the finest typesetters I have ever known started his successful 

computer-services business after he was undeservedly sacked from a 

business he had co-founded. It was a big blow and he was about to apply 

to work in another business centre when he implemented the Self-

Probing Talk. Digging into his past jerked him up and propelled him 

towards a clue that changed his life: you may have no money, and no 

office space, but start your own business centre right away! Don’t ask me 

how he did it; digging into his past life, the SPT way, evoked that clue 

which made it possible for him to do it!  

People hardly revisit themselves, they conduct no personal retreats, and 

so produce no new strategies to overcome difficult, and often recurring, 

personal problems. They seem not to know that within their past lie 

useful but often undetected insights into their future. The SPT activity, 

when seriously and soberly conducted, is much more than a talk show. 

The SPT exercise, when fertilized by thoughtful enquiry under the 

guidance of a mind sensitive to useful cues, can give birth to urgent 



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insights that crystallize the right decisions, fresh opportunities, creative 

alternatives, and amazing results. 

Figure 1: Look inwards and talk to yourself 

 

Source: www.clipartmax.com 

The conduct of the SPT exercise may differ from person to person, and 

that’s OK; just make sure your own exercise is conducted in accordance 

with the guidelines stated in this paper.   

The outcome of the SPT exercise should be noted. In fact, if the 

individual involved so prefer, the “talk” may be conducted in writing. 

This will entail sitting down in some quiet corner and pouring down, in 

one or two sessions, one’s evaluative recollection or understanding of 

events. Many people, I believe, will find it easier or more cathartic to talk 

orally than to capture their thoughts in writing.  

Whichever method is adopted, it is crucial to ensure that one is talking to 

oneself and not to someone else and that the talk is conducted when one 

is alone. The Self-Probing Talk, it needs to be stressed, is self-analysis, 

not group analysis. It is one talking to oneself, probing one’s actions and 

inactions, and exploring private and confidential matters. It is important 

to conduct the talk where no one else will hear or distract you. 

Once you are seated or pacing to and fro in your private room, you can 

begin your SPT talk by probing into that area of your life where the issue 

of concern is emanating from. Proceed as your thoughts and emotions 



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may lead you but ensure that you reassess key issues of your life with a 

view to determining where you made choices that hurt the steady and 

unwavering pursuit of specific goals.      

The SPT talk is essentially recalling personal chronicles given rise to by 

one’s beliefs, values and habits (BVH) and analyzing their implication 

for the pursuit of set goals. So, during your SPT exercise, you need to 

ask, among other questions, BVH-specific questions. Questions such as: 

“My belief that advertising is exploiting people’s emotion in order to 

make them buy what they don’t need – how has this belief and my 

refusal to advertise led to the poor sales I’ve been recording?” “Should I 

increase the percentage of my salary that I invest to enable me earn more 

passive income?” “I have had three fiancées and now I’m about to break 

up with the fourth. What is really wrong with my relationship values?” 

It is called the Self-Probing Talk because it is one talking to oneself to 

see where one had made right or wrong decisions or choices. It is not a 

talk about what others had done or failed to do. It is not a blame or buck-

passing game. Yes, others might have contributed to your past failures 

and losses but if you are honest about it, you will discover that you have, 

somehow, contributed, favourably or unfavourably, to nearly every 

situation of your life. Could it not be they cheated you because you were 

careless or trusted too much? Could you have failed if you were 

thoroughly prepared for the business or the competition?  

It might have been sheer hatred that stood those forces against you, but if 

you had reacted tactfully couldn’t things have turned out differently? Oh, 

it is the system; it is all designed to work against someone like me… 

Don’t let this kind of thought bother you, for when you excel, and excel 

irresistibly, systems open to let you pass.  

The SPT activity offers you moments of hard-hitting reflection that 

enables you to gain clarity and locate what you need to do to make a 

success of your life. The biting edge of such self-analysis, especially 

when unnecessary excuses are disallowed, may be very discomforting, 

but let the scalpel of this self-enquiry do its work. How did I get it 

wrong? How did I miss the mark? What personal shortcomings brought 

about the setback? What do I need to do differently to make me succeed, 

regardless of the challenges? These are the kind of questions and issues 

you should sincerely and openly address.  

Other people might have consciously or unconsciously blocked your 

way, and there might have been some unfavourable external factors but 



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none of these must be elevated above your capacity to break through 

every barrier and achieve your goal!  

You will arrive at the destination you envisioned if you let nobody and 

nothing block your way. It is your way! It is your responsibility to 

surmount or circumvent whatever is on your way to make things happen 

for you. And should the task be daunting, should the way be repeatedly 

blocked, well, you must do what you can to out-manouevre the obstacle. 

And if need be, pave a new way for yourself. By all legal and innovative 

means, succeed!  

You must be merciless, but without wallowing in self-pity, while 

analyzing your situation. Find out where you made mistakes in the past 

and locate what you must do right to make you succeed. Don’t deny your 

mistakes; you must realize that if you had not made a mistake you might 

not have mis-stepped. Accept your mistakes without feeling sorry for 

yourself, but be determined not to repeat those mistakes or make other 

careless choices in the future.  

Avoid agonizing over what someone has done to frustrate or stop you! 

Don’t rub the balm of self-pity and soothe your aching ego by blaming 

others. This will not help you to get to where you are going. It is your 

life, it is your quest. Focus on where you are going, and don’t forget that 

realizing your desired goal is what matters most.   

This is why the Self-Probing Talk is about you looking inward to gain 

clarity, to re-strategize, and take winning steps towards the future. 

Everyone can do this but, just as earlier noted with respect to the BVH 

Evaluation, there might be some people who might need expert guidance 

to carry out this process with significant beneficial results.  

Don’t forget, the Self-Probing Talk is not a pointless reflection: its 

ultimate aim is to produce, through your sober recollections, a useful 

decision-making insight or a clue towards a possible solution or new 

course of action. Unless it led you to harness a helpful clue or clues, the 

Self-Probing Talk should not be deemed to be over. Keep mulling over 

the issues until something epiphanic happens – a revelation or connection 

that illuminates the confusion and points you to a promising way out of 

the problem. But “the way out” must not be an escapist “solution” that 

side-tracks the challenge and steers you toward some pleasant goal-

boycotting path.  

Continue with the SPT exercise until you have some clues regarding the 

way forward or the way out of the problem. The endpoint of the Self-

Probing Talk is the attainment of significant clarity, one that suggests a 



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useful clue – it could be the identification of what might be the problem 

and a possible solution; or it could be an inkling that leads to a change of 

strategy. If this endpoint is not reached, do not move to the Guided 

Question and Answer (GQA) stage. If you do, you are likely to get a 

distorted result, a set of pointless clues that leave you confused regarding 

which step to take. Should this happen, return to the Self-Probing Talk 

stage and do it all over again before continuing with the GQA session.  

There are two ways of repeating the Self-Probing Talk. The first is to 

start “talking” to yourself the way you had earlier done – speaking out 

audibly or inaudibly to yourself in your closet, pouring out your mind on 

paper, or using a recording device to capture your talk.  

The second method of repeating your Self-Probing Talk is to recall your 

earlier “talk” on the same issue and read or listen to it over and over 

again. Proof-readers would tell you that the more they go through a 

manuscript, the more mistakes they are likely to find. A similar reality 

applies here; the more you read or hear your talk’s “message”, the more 

insight you are likely to gain into key aspects of the matter of current 

concern. On one occasion, I had to listen to and reflect upon my SPT talk 

twice before hitting the crucial point that led me to the way forward.  

Note, however, that the method of recalling your earlier “talk” may not 

be adopted unless the following conditions are met:  

i. the initial talk was clearly written or recorded,  

ii. the initial talk was exhaustive enough to make conducting a 

fresh talk unnecessary.   

The Self-Probing Talk is deemed to have been concluded at any given 

time only after one has gotten a helpful clue regarding which cause of 

action to take. 

Before going further, let us note that the SPT is not meant to be used in 

determining the validity of issues of public interest, such as a public 

health advisory, nor should it sidetrack the need for fact-finding research. 

Information is vital. Some of the issues people face can be easily 

resolved if they can avail themselves of available information, and take 

necessary action. Many people, for example, are unemployed because 

they don’t know where their services are needed and, therefore, have not 

gone there or reached out by mail to seek for employment. To dig up 

non-personal hard facts, one would need to conduct objective research. 

Don’t watch your problem; find out what can be done about it, and take 

action!  



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The SPT is basically a vocalized recollection of past experiences aimed 

at generating an optimal goal-driven decision concerning a 

developmental, occupational or social matter of personal relevance.  

Complemented by the GQA session (discussed below), the SPT exercise 

serves as one of the means of weighing how relevant an idea, clue, 

thought or suggestion is in the decision-making process or to the pursuit 

of one’s goal.  

Only for the Willing and Sincere 

As you might have realized by now, the Self-Querying Process can only 

make sense if the person utilizing the tools being proposed here is willing 

to reassess his or her beliefs, values and habits. Willingness and sincerity 

are the primary requirements. Should one be willing and sincere as well 

as repentant, in the sense of being ready to depart from current negative 

beliefs, values and habits, then we have the perfect individual for whom 

this paper was written.  

Issues of beliefs, values and habits can be personal and any meaningful 

change in perspective or behavior would need the cooperation of the 

individual involved. So, for any step of the Self-Querying Process to 

yield result for any individual, he or she must be sincere at every stage of 

the soul-searching procedure. The entire process is predicated on the fact 

that the individual involved in it is desirous of change as well as ready to 

be honest about his or her strengths and shortcomings. 

Specifically, ensure that the Self-Probing Talk (discussed above) and the 

GQA session (discussed below) are applied to your unique situation with 

a delicate sense of destiny. See these steps as self-managed mechanisms 

you can utilize to overcome whatever is hindering you from charting a 

clearer and more focused path for your life.  

The Self-Querying Process is very personal and confidential and can 

deliver great benefits in self-enlightenment for whoever would approach 

this process with a sense of purpose and mission. 

The Guided Question and Answer (GQA) Session 

The second soul-searching step of the Self-Querying Process (SQP) is the 

Guided Question and Answer (GQA) session. While this sort of auto-

analysis may take other forms, the technique I have developed, having 

used it and found it effective in different contexts, is the Guided Question 

and Answer (GQA) method. The main aim of the GQA session is to 

enable the individual to ask personally-relevant, issue-based questions to 

which only Yes or No answers are required. Whatever matter is under 



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consideration, the Yes/No answers are taken as indicators of what could 

be that individual’s right decision, goal or response.  

The GQA session involves a series of questions set by the one who had 

conducted the SPT talk and derived a clue or clues about the way 

forward. At the GQA stage, such a person is required to turn the issues he 

had recollected and reflected upon into guided questions framed within 

the context of whether the issue raised in the question is pro-success or 

anti-success. If the person’s response to his or her own question is Yes, 

the matter raised in the question is deemed to be pro-success or positive 

(+); if No, the matter raised in the question is deemed to be anti-success 

or negative (–).   

In a nutshell, the goal of the GQA session is to use the tool of guided 

questions to generate responses that narrow the many clues the enquirer 

might have emerged with from the Self-Probing Talk (SPT) into two 

clear options: pro-success or anti-success. In a well-conducted session, 

the respondent’s Yes responses would turn out to be pro-success while 

the No responses would most likely be anti-success.   

For the GQA session to be effective, the guidelines that characterize it 

must be strictly adhered to. To make your GQA session generate realistic 

rather than emotive, goal-pointed rather than blurred result, the following 

rules should be observed: 

a. All the questions must arise from and be restricted to the issues raised 

during the Self-Probing Talk (SPT). 

b. Use one format (with or without slight variations) for all the self-

evaluative questions relevant to your specific situation or enquiry. This 

format can be a uniformly-phrased question, such as, “This thing that I 

believe, value, or do (specify), will it take me closer to my goal?” The 

dependent clause (“This thing that I believe, value, or do”) would differ 

from question to question but the independent clause (“will it take me 

closer to my goal?”) should be the same or similar in every question that 

requires a Yes/No response. This will ensure that the questions are 

commonly posed, thus making the Yes or No responses generated 

effective, uniformly-derived pointers to action. 

c. Since the objective of the GQA session is to enable the enquirer to 

determine what is to be done about the matter under consideration, each 

question (such as, “…will it take me closer to my goal?”) should address 

a present or future concern. Questions probing the past (such as “…did it 

take me closer to my dream?”) are NOT allowed during the GQA 

session. But during the Self-Probing Talk exercise, which precedes the 



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GQA stage, one may analyze present and past events in any possible 

manner. However, reference to past events within the dependent clause 

may be allowed as long as the clause completing the sentence ends with 

“…will it (will he/she or will they) take me closer to my goal?” or some 

other permissible uniformly-adopted format of ending the question.       

Success is a Matter of Yes or No 

A lot, quite a lot in success progression or regression, will depend on 

how one answers GQA’s self-evaluative questions. Let’s consider how 

not to answer them. It is important not to be wordy, defensive or 

explanatory in the responses you give. Excuses often hide in thickets of 

words. In football, it usually takes only one effective shot to score a goal 

while many ineffective kicks and passes may lead to no goal. Explaining 

away the failure to score could take words that outnumber all the futile 

kicks and passes put together. Don’t be wordy to avoid making undue 

excuses. 

So, discounting the possibility of a spectrum of values (the afore-

recommended phrasing of the self-evaluative questions having 

effectively ensured that), we may now dichotomize and declare that, as 

far as the pursuit of success is concerned, there are two kinds of beliefs, 

and two kinds of values, and two kinds of habits: positive and negative. 

In considering, therefore, the self-evaluative question, “This thing that I 

believe, value, or do (specify), will it take me closer to my goal?”, your 

answer should be either yes (positive) or no (negative). Success (or 

failure) is a matter of yes or no – a matter of choosing one way or the 

other and acting in the direction of that choice. Anything other than yes 

or no is suspect, cannot be given a positive (+) or negative (–) sign and, 

therefore, may not be a clear pointer or guide to action.  

This is why GQA session questions are phrased in a manner that prompts 

one to say Yes or No. No middle or neutral ground. No provision for “I 

don’t know” answers. No room for equivocation or sitting on the fence.  

The GQA session places you in the court of your own opinion 

demanding neither “Guilty” nor “Not Guilty” plea but simply your Yes 

or No response to vital queries of your visionary quest. If the question is 

properly phrased, a Yes response (assigned a + sign) is goal-oriented and 

pro-success while a No response (assigned a – sign) is explicitly counter-

goal and anti-success:  

Yes = pro-success + – anti-success = No 

 



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Interestingly, the most fundamental things of life are separated into two 

divisions: day and night, male and female, good and evil, life and death. 

To gain clarity in one’s life, one should be able to sort out issues in terms 

of “Yes” or “No”. Equivocation is a sign of indecision, and an indecisive 

person is an unstable person – and unstable people hardly make 

substantial progress in life. That is why it is important to use the GQA 

session to determine what is pointedly right or wrong in one’s success 

journey. 

Rules Governing the Framing of Questions for the Guided Question 

and Answer (GQA) Session 

For the GQA session to generate a reliable, goal-oriented outcome, each 

of the questions requiring a Yes/No response should be posed according 

to the following rules: 

1. All the questions must arise from and be restricted to the issues raised 

during the Self-Probing Talk (SPT). 

2. Each question should be asked in the first person. 

3. Each question should be asked in such a way that a Yes or No answer 

would be given. 

4. A modal verb inverted with the subject, which indicates future time 

(such as “will” or “can”), should be used to form the interrogative 

question. 

5. The independent clause ending with the question mark should be 

uniformly or similarly worded in all the questions. 

Goal-Chasing Fundamentals 

Before we demonstrate how the GQA session can be conducted in 

practice, let us briefly refresh our minds about the basic things we need 

to know regarding setting and realizing personal goals. Knowledge of 

goal-chasing fundamentals should be in place before anyone can derive 

maximum benefit from the GQA session.   

Life is meaningless without a defined sense of purpose to dictate and 

coordinate one’s desires and actions. No one can have a sense of purpose 

without having a set of authentic beliefs, values, and habits (Nakolisa, 

2022). These will stimulate him to envision a desirable future. Then, he 

begins the exciting, highly focused climb towards it. He approaches this 

vision passionately through rungs of short-, medium-, and long-term 

goals.  



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For your goals to be workable, they must be specific, measurable, and 

timed (Doran, 1981). A specific goal usually aims to get one thing 

accomplished, and the goal-setter realizes this objective by ignoring other 

things competing for his attention to focus on getting this one thing done. 

A goal is measured by the specific tasks the goal-setter needs to perform 

before realizing it. Ideally, such tasks are performed sequentially such 

that one accomplished task lays the foundation for and enhances the 

performance of the next scheduled task. And effort should be made to 

perform each task within the time allocated to it. 

Goals, also, are not arbitrarily executed but are realized one by one in an 

ascending order of visionary relevance (Nakolisa, 2006). It is in this 

sense that goals can be said to be ascendant arrows of graded attainments. 

(See Figure 1.1) 

Figure 2: Ascendant arrows of graded attainments 

 

A visionary picture is what drives a goal – it enables every individual to 

see where they are going and supplies them the passion they require to 

keep seeing where they are going, even in their life project’s foggy 

moments and in seasons of personal and social turmoil.  

A vision is an internal force. Everyone’s goals are the steps they take to 

externalize and make real their visionary dream. So, everyone needs their 

vision, and they need their goals. Everyone’s vision is the lubricant of 

their goals. Vision gives goals direction. It helps one ensure that one’s 



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goals are not arbitrary or contradictory but are rather sequential targets or 

results that take one closer to that big thing one wants to achieve in life.  

An Illustrative Story 

We need a real-life scenario to illustrate how the GQA session might be 

conducted by the individual. Below is a true-life story with the real 

names of the individuals mentioned in the story changed. Let’s call it 

Teddy’s Story. 

Teddy’s Story 

 Teddy’s family was holding a meeting to see how he could be helped to start a new 

business or learn a new trade. Sitting quietly in their midst, Teddy (real names withheld) 

was nursing his resentment of some past ventures that looked too promising to fail but 

failed nonetheless.  

Claiming to be better in using his hands than in cramming class notes, Teddy had 

dropped out of secondary school two years before he was due to take his ordinary-level 

examinations. Since then, he had worked as an apprentice motor mechanic, a barber, a 

school-bus driver, a bricklayer, a pub guitarist, a cross-border cannabis smuggler, and a 

quick-fix pimp and match-maker of sorts. During his stint work as a political thug, he 

got his only somewhat appreciable pay when he was compensated for losing two teeth 

in defence of the boss.  

None of the above engagements had financially stabilized Teddy, a regular face in 

rowdy parties where he was hailed by many but trusted by none. Years after many of his 

schoolmates had graduated from the university and climbed the corporate ladder or set 

up successful businesses, Teddy was pressurizing his siblings and aged parents to 

contribute funds to enable him “travel abroad and make money”. 

Exemplification of the Yes/No Responses      

To make the normative value of the Yes/No responses more practical, 

let’s return to Teddy’s story. You will recall that he was in a family 

meeting called to see how his protracted failure to make progress in life 

could be ended.  

Teddy left the meeting asking his family to give him time to think over 

their proposals. Let’s assume he was now tired of his self-engineered 

retardation and had used the Self-Probing Talk to appraise his situation 

more honestly, emerging from the talk with a clearer sense of what he 

should be doing with his life…   

And now, Teddy is ready to use the GQA session to test the clues he 

obtained from the SPT exercise – to find out the best decision he should 

make to move his life forward. 

Let’s assume Teddy, after his SPT session, came up with 10 questions 

and is set to test each of them in terms of whether it is pro-success or 



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anti-success. Each question is framed around issues taken from his 

unique experience, particularly those emerging from his reflections 

during his Self-Probing Talk. 

For illustrative purposes, let’s take it that Teddy seriously considered the 

following questions: 

1. My lack of a sense of purpose or an overriding goal in life, will it take 

me closer to my dream of being a successful person? 

2. My habit of dropping out of worthwhile pursuits and my habit of 

starting a project without finishing it, will it take me closer to my dream 

of being a successful person? 

3. My get-rich-quick attitude and schemes, which had continually put me 

in trouble, will it take me closer to my dream of being a successful 

person? 

4. The kind of choices I made after the failure of each of my past 

businesses, choices that didn’t indicate I had learnt the right lesson, will 

they take me closer to my dream of being a successful person? 

5. Remaining a pimp and a cannabis smoker and smuggler, assuming I 

don’t get caught and jailed like Sneaky Boy, will it take me closer to my 

dream of being a successful person? 

6. My family members have pledged to give me a lump sum of money to 

start life all over again on the condition that I should first serve under a 

successful trader and learn a trade for two years…going to learn a new 

trade, as proposed by my relations, will it take me closer to my dream of 

being a successful person? 

7. Doing music is the one thing that gives me the greatest joy in life and 

the one thing that I can work hard at with a sense of responsibility and 

achieve success, but that’s what my family is not willing to sponsor. 

Doing whatever I can to advance my music career, foregoing every other 

alternative venture my family would prefer to finance, will it take me 

closer to my dream of being a successful person? 

8. What about my plans and hopes of going abroad…? My mum had 

blocked my plans of being sponsored by the family when she said that 

someone who could not be a successful lizard at home should not hope to 

be a crocodile abroad. Maybe my mum is right… Going abroad without 

first correcting those shortcomings that made me to fail repeatedly in the 

past, will it take me closer to my dream of being a successful person? 



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9. Uncle Ray has suggested that I should go back to school and even 

promised to sponsor me. But I feel I’m too old for that and I’ve never 

really been a good student. Taking up Uncle Ray’s generous offer, will it 

take me closer to my dream of being a successful person? 

10. What of returning to my former master, from whose workshop I ran 

away many years ago, to complete my training as a car mechanic…will it 

take me closer to my dream of being a successful person? 

Chart of Teddy’s Yes/No Responses 

Preparing a chart such as the one below is desirable because it makes you 

to state your questions and answers in writing and leaves you with a 

written record of the turning point your GQA session could become. 

Besides, the writing option makes it easy for you to correct your 

questions and bring them in line with the rules governing the framing of 

GQA questions. 

There are people who find writing things down, particularly when it runs 

into a few paragraphs, very stressful. Some others may feel that the effort 

expended in ensuring that their thoughts are properly framed may 

obstruct or derail the free flow of their thoughts. It will be nice if this 

category of persons can choose to overcome their shortcomings and write 

down their questions. Otherwise, they should resort to using the 

recording device in their electronic gadgets to voice out their questions 

and answers, particularly if the questions are not more than five.  

Let’s take a look at what might have emerged as Teddy’s responses – 

responses that indicate an apparent willingness to change for the better. 

Here is the table of his responses to the 10 questions posed above. For the 

sake of brevity, only the direct questions are used below; the preceding 

statements are excluded. And the independent clauses ending with the 

question mark have been reworded to bring them in line with rules 4 and 

5 above. 

Teddy’s Questions and Answers 

 Question Answer Sign 

 

1 My lack of a sense of purpose or an 

overriding goal in life, will it take me 

closer to my vision? No – 

2 My habit of dropping out of worthwhile 

pursuits and starting a project without 

finishing it, will it take me closer to my No – 



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68 
 

vision? 

3 Continuing my get-rich-quick attitude 

and schemes, which had continually put 

me in trouble in the past… will it take 

me closer to my vision? No – 

4 Continuing with the kind of choices I 

made after the failure of each of my 

past businesses, choices that didn’t 

indicate I had learnt the right lesson, 

will it take me closer to my vision? 

 

No 

 

– 

5 Continuing to be a pimp and a cannabis 

smuggler, with the risk of being caught 

and jailed like Sneaky Boy, will that 

take me closer to my vision? No – 

6 My family members have pledged to 

give me a lump sum of money to start 

life all over again on the condition that I 

should first serve under a successful 

trader and learn a trade for two 

years…following this proposed plan, 

will it take me closer to my vision? 

 

 

No 

 

 

 

 

 

 

– 

7 Doing whatever I can to advance my 

music career, foregoing every other 

alternative venture my family would 

prefer to finance, will it take me closer 

to my vision? 

 

 

 

Yes + 

8 Insisting on going abroad without first 

correcting those shortcomings that 

made me to fail repeatedly here at 

home, will it take me closer to my 

vision? No – 

9 Taking up Uncle Ray’s generous offer 

to sponsor my return to secondary 

school decades after I dropped out of 

school, will it take me closer to my 

vision? 

 

 

 

No 

 

 

 

– 

10 

 

What of returning to my former master, 

from whose workshop I ran away many 

years ago, to complete my training and 

become a car mechanic, will it take me 

closer to my vision? 

 

No 

 

 

 

– 

 



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69 
 

In the above illustrative table, you would notice that Teddy gave only one 

positive response, which clearly indicated what step he should take.  

Some charts may be more complicated than this in that they may contain 

more than one positive response, which is not a problem if all the 

positive responses support each other or enhance the emergence of a 

definite goal/decision or point towards a definite course of action.  

If such indicated steps appear contradictory, it is possibly   

i. a sign that the individual had not emerged from the Self-Probing 

Talk with a genuine clue or clues regarding what might be his or 

her decision, goal or direction; or 

ii. an indication that some or all of the questions of the GQA 

session were not properly thought out or phrased.      

The likely solution to (i) above is for the individual involved to return to 

the Self-Probing Talk (SPT) stage and conduct afresh the exercise. Let 

him or her probe deeper into the issues of concern, noting the choices 

made and examining if or how those choices contributed to the eventual 

turn of events. The person probing his past actions should also endeavour 

to locate the extent to which specific beliefs, values and habits have 

positively or negatively contributed to leading or misleading him or her 

to make those choices.  

The solution to (ii) is to revise the questions in order to ensure that each 

of them is framed according to the rules earlier specified. 

Meanwhile, during the process of talking and analyzing issues, the sober 

self-analyst is likely to generate some inner awakening that might light 

up some areas of confusion, doubt or ignorance…and this is when the 

self-analyst should steer his reflection to the search for clues that point 

toward a solution, the right decision, a purposeful goal or a meaningful 

vision.  

As earlier pointed out, the GQA session is a process that should only be 

meaningfully used AFTER one has, at least, gotten a clue regarding what 

decision, goal or vision he or she appears to be leaning towards. The 

series of questions raised during the GQA session is aimed at generating 

answers whose positive or negative slant would authenticate or invalidate 

the clue(s) gotten at the end of the Self-Probing Talk (SPT).  

The SPT is a spontaneous, chronological or non-chronological 

recollection of past events. When the reflection leads to clarification of 

mind-boggling issues or produces an insight into the way out of the 



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problem, viable clues usually emerge. Now, these clues will need to be 

verified during the GQA session. Where a one-track solution is required, 

as in many cases in life, the GQA session becomes a way of helping the 

solution-seeker to choose a course of action, and to choose rightly.    

 

References 

Doran, G. T. (1981). There's a S.M.A.R.T. way to write management's 

goals and objectives. Management Review, 70 (11): 35–36. 

Nakolisa, D. (2006). Ten Key Qualities of Highly Successful People. 

Abuja: Klamidas. 

Nakolisa, D. (2022). Utilizing Beliefs, Values and Habits as Tools for 

Determining Personal Outcomes. Global Online Journal of 

Academic Research (GOJAR),1(1): 7-39. 

https://klamidas.com/gojar-v1n1-2022-01/. 

www.clipartmax.com/middle/m2i8i8b1H7A0H7N4_695px-group-of-

people-talking-clipart-ate6g4rt4-clipart-people-talking/ 

 

 

Author Information: Duve Nakolisa is the General Editor, 

Klamidas Books, Abuja. Email: klamidasbooks@gmail.com. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


